Not dry january. But less booze in general. Anyone else?

[Frouby]

I am posting this thread because I really want to reduce the amount of alcohol I drink.

I was going to do dry January but think that is too much for me. And when I do drink again I will revert back to bad habits.

On a normal week I would have 1 or 2 g and ts mon to thurs. Bottle of wine on a friday. Then either a couple of beers or a couple of g and ts on a Saturday night. Nothing on sunday.

Over Christmas (which started for us mid December as we had a holiday) I have drank every day. Never been drunk drunk but 4 or 5 drinks every day.

I feel fat, bloated and lethargic. I want to cut my drinking down to a couple of nights a week. Friday and Saturday. Or thursday and friday. DP also drinks most days (more than me too) and we both need to address our relationship with alcohol.

I didn't drink last night and won't tonight either. And I feel 100% better already. We get married in May and I want to lose weight and improve my health.

Does anyone else want to join this thread for support? I know there is the dry January thread but I will be drinking (probably) 2 days a week so dont want to post on there and knock any penguins off the ice.

Currently drinking ginger ale with loads of ice and contemplating a shower and a cupp of tea later with the last of the Christmas cake (diet starts tomorrow) 😁

Welcome Ilovejumpers. 4 days AF is fab! Have you been up in the night piddling? I was for about 4 days. I feel so much better for AF days. And feel much more in control of everything.

Athena whippets are lovely lovely dogs. As long as you don't mind a pokey boned sofa companion 😂😂. And have high sideboards. She is a terrible food theif. In fact she nicks drinks too. Including g and t, baileys and coffee. She isn't a wine fan tho.

Having a drink tonight tho. Had a fab weeks work so think I deserve it. My lovely ndn bought me a new gin glass and haven't had chance to use it yet. It's too nice for tonic and lime.

Another welcome to ilovejumpers. I think we all know how you feel about having no off-switch - but four days is definitely good. I get to about two days then find a spurious reason to drink - though given that it was every single night, even going a couple of days between drinks now feels like major progress. I am hoping to get through half term AF, though that might be several bridges too far.

Frouby: you did make me laugh with tales of your food thief. Ours used to counter-surf - hook a paw on the edge of the worktop and glide along, hoovering up anything within jaw range. One once ate some poor fisherman's sandwiches while he was minding his own business at the side of a river...

Owww half term AF is a challenge, good on you for it! I’m a bit annoyed it’s half term, it’s normally an excuse for a free for all NO school run, BUT I’m really pleased with how well this week has gone and want to continue but there are many meet ups that WILL involve a drink. So, this weekend I’m planning on no wine tomorrow, I’m not sure how well this will go as one child away and my DP comes home on Friday eve, it’s normally a boozey catch up. Saturday I’m planning on A bottle of wine, same Sunday as we have friends round for lunch. If I can stick to this I’ll be chuffed as normally Fri, Sat, Sun are a couple at the pub then a bottle at home. Massive reduction if I can pull it off. Have a good eve y’all, wet or dry .

The acronym I was talking about is HALT. Hungry, angry, lonely, tired. All the triggers to pop a cork. Think em through before you go for it a read.

I had one measured shot of scotch on Wednesday and 2 last night - so three units of alcohol in three days - very pleased.
Frouby your girl is lovely.
Athena - half term and reducing alcohol sounds like a tough ask!

Welcome ilove

Afternoon all

Had 3 35ml gins last night. Feel ok today tho. And although I did want the 4th I switched to water.

Tonight is likely to be wet. It's our curry night and I have wine in the fridge. Happy weekend everyone and hope it's as wet or as dry as you would like.

Ilovejumpers: yes, the HALT thing is true. I have put a big notice up in my gin cupboard (though there is no gin in there at the mo, because I am determined not to buy any more for fear of drinking it), saying "Richer, thinnner, happier, prettier". These are all the things I will be if I drink less. Not that it always helps...

Fiveshelties: 3 units in 3 days is splendid. If you only had 7 in 7 days, you'd be massively within ok guidelines.

Frouby: the switch to water after the third is impressive. That's where I struggle. Glad to know you are measuring it too. I have a little 35ml measuring glass thingy so I have to be honest now.

DP came last night, which led to pretty much a bottle of wine each (possibly a bit less). Needless to say, I fell asleep beautifully at 10 PM, and woke up at 2 AM with horrendous beer-fear, headache, etc, etc. Was properly awake for a good two hours, then sort of dozed fitfully, so have spent the day feeling horrendous. Had a small taste of wine this eve (35ml) while cooking, as DC1 is home for the weekend and wanted a glass as well - though stopped there and had some of my Becks Blue instead (a good discovery - it does taste like the real thing, which I haven't had for about 25 years!!)

Hope you are all doing ok...

Well I had a couple of glasses of wine last night. There is actually over 1/3 of the bottle left. Wtf is wrong with me lol.

And I felt headachey this morning which is pretty unfair considering the amount I drank.

I might possibly finish it off tonight. Possibly.

Hi all,

I've now done 30 days booze free this year which makes me rather proud. Training for a half marathon is definitely focussing the mind - when that's over there'll be much less incentive.

Might drink tonight though as I've done a long run today and DH is away for a week after tonight. Much easier not to drink when he's away.

Going to read the thread now and see how you're all doing. This bloody weather doesn't help, does it?

Saturday night and only two glasses of wine. Didn't start till 9.30 pm so that was a help.
Friday night was a meal out with the girls though, so a jug of wine and two G&Ts.
Probably have some wine tonight too but AF then till Friday 🤞🏼

That's fab growingboys. You must be chuffed to bits. And the stopping after a couple is impressive orin. That was the hardest bit for me initially too.

I did finish the wine last night. 2 small glasses. So only 4 AF nights last week but I drank the same as last week.

Another strange thing I have noticed. My period arrived Thurs. It was a bit of a surprise as I haven't had horrendous cramps and haven't been in a vile mood. It was due but I usually know 2 days before. And for the first time in years I really wanted chocolate. I presume it's because I have reduced the amount of sugar I have been consuming by reducing alcohol.

Afternoon all,

Funny you should mention chocolate, Frouby, as I have just bought some after not having any in the house for ages. My periods have also gone weird (started another one 8 days after finishing the previous one , but sort of vaguely thought mine are trying to synch with DDs...)

Anyway. Growingboys, that is fantastic. I am definitely not in that league, but as I keep saying, any improvement is better than nothing.

Oren: I am going to try to do the same as you, but will possibly not succeed. Maybe we need to keep nudging one another...

Weird evening last night. I went to the theatre with a friend, M. Ended up driving there, as I missed the train. When I got there, M had another friend with her. She had warned me beforehand that her friend "A, a mad alcoholic" would be there. I'd thought not much of it beforehand - but said A was already pissed when I got there. In the interval, she was doing the over-excited drunk talking thing (which, in my sober state, I recognised as something I have undoubtedly done before now ). That kind of talking where you feel as if you're really clever and funny and invincible. She was also giving off alcoholic fumes, which scared me a bit (in case I have done the same).

Anyway, after the play, A suggested going to the pub. M was happy to go; I said I would just go for a short while as I had quite a long drive and wanted to get home.

So I ended up sitting there in the pub while M had a couple of glasses of wine and A became progressively more incoherent. By the end of it, she was staggering around and declaring undying love for me. It was so weird, being the non-drinking one. I can't remember when that last happened.

Sorry - that's a bit rambly. I was also feeling very sorry for myself due to problems with DP and one of the DC, so I would like to say I was very virtuous and had a cup of tea when I got home. In fact, I had a small (60ml) whiskey. But I did then stop.

I think it told me two things. 1. I was really quite jealous of my friends being able to drink when I was stuck with driving and Diet Coke. I so badly wanted to join them!! 2. I just hope to God that I have never come across in the way that A did. She actually seemed like a really nice person, but evidently really needed alcohol. I very much had the sense that she was probably struggling with MH problems, and trying to suppress them by drinking. I know how this works (or doesn't work), and I really do have to make every possible effort not to go down that route.

I am going to start keeping a proper diary, as all the days seem to merge into one.

o well. All good resolutions etc. They do not account for RL, etc. Not counting, now.as it would be too depressing...

Athena tomorrow is a new day.

We'll do it together tomorrow x

Oreo, thank you. I so, so needed to hear that. Have written off tonight...x

Oreo? Sorry. Can't type either...x

Ah Athena. If resolutions were easy we wouldn't bother making them. Maybe try a glass of water between drinks to reduce the hangover a little?

Tomorrow is another day.

I definetly have less tolerance for Dp being slightly drunk when I am sober. In fact he is bloody annoying.

Frouby. Thank you. Tonight is bad on many fronts, which would be threads in themselves, and which would probably involve LTB. But you are bright spark in all of that...

Am sorry to hear things are shitty. You can tell us about it. We might say ltb but you don't have to if you don't want to. The wine dealing would make it very difficult for me to ltb I know.

and lots of for tomorrow morning.

Frouby, I know it is not in the spirit of MN, but your message made me feel a bit teary and grateful for your kindness. The problem with Wine Dealer DP is that he was my best friend for many years before we got together (I had designs on him far sooner, needless to say). He is also the only person I have ever loved who is not related to me by blood. But he is difficult, a loner, won't commit (not because he want to shag around, which he patently doesn't, but because he actually likes lots of things about being single. He has never lied or tried to deceive me about this. Needless to say, I thought I would change his mind, but haven't, in any meaningful sense). All that said, he is lovely, kind, generous, all the things that XH wasn't. If he were another straightforward arse, it would be easy to leave him (another poster on another thread said, rightly, that life is too short to waste on unsatisfactory men). But there is so much good about him that it is very hard.

As for the Baby DC (now a teenager). Well. Teenagers. What can I say? I find this all the harder as I was a very boring and compliant teenager. My others have been ok, but they were murderous when younger...

I think teens are either angels or devils! I have dd who is 13 and now we are past puberty is pretty much an angel at the moment. But boys are starting to be mentioned and that is when the fun begins.

I have numerous nieces and nephews and all were either angels or devils. But even the devilish ones come good again eventually.

I know what you mean about your dp. To be fair, if I were ever to become single again I wouldn't want the whole living as a couple thing. Living seperately but in a meaningful relationship sounds much better to me and my sense of independence. But it's frustrating when you are the one that wants more and everything else is good other than what you actually want.

If I were in your situation I would be asking myself if I could be happy as it is. Or whether I would be more unhappy alone. But with the potential to meet someone else. And that is never going to be an easy decision to make.

Had a good morning so far. Productive workwise and just nipped up to the allotment. Planted 3 blueberries and 3 rhubarb crowns.

Hello Frouby. Glad you had a productive morning. It is pouring here...

Relationships. Sigh. Teenagers likewise. I do know many who have 'come good' after a difficult few years, so I am hoping. As for the Wine Dealer: I will hang in there, for the time being at least. I wouldn't even want to live with anyone again, so I need to remind myself of this.

All my resolutions have been blown away this week. An old friend rang to say he was coming to visit family, so we had lunch which was long and involved copious amounts of wine. I am feeling fragile now. So that was Sunday night and Monday lunchtime. I am very cross with myself. I thought I could do better than this. I think I am going to have to try to take things day by day, rather than aiming for whole weeks. I can also feel gloom descending on me, and I am sure it is related to having slipped back down a big fat snake, alcohol-wise.

I also need to keep reading this thread. I really need it.

How is everyone else?

Drinking hot choc like it's going out of fashion!

Beck's Blue here...

I am ok today. Not even thought about alcohol.

I don't want to brag but I really am finding it easier each week. It was so fucking difficult at first. From about 3pm 5pm I was desperate for a drink. And I mean desperate. Having 2 or 3 naice soft drinks with ice just to get me through to 8pm.

I feel physically and mentally stronger. And I have much more energy. Today I got up at 6am, did a couple of hours work. Shampood and scrubbed the 2 massive sofas. Decided to do the stairs as well then thought fuck it might as well do the upstairs carpets too. So cleaned them as well. And blitzed downstairs.

Normally I would do the sofa one day, then the stairs and then the bedrooms.

I cleaned the fridge AND freezer yesterday. And went to the allotment. Did a few hpurs work in the morning. Took ds to his swimming lesson in the afternoon.

It doesn't sound much but it is half term, I would usually just do normal housework in half term. Not the big jobs and certainly not more than 1.

I didn't realise just how much the alcohol was impacting me.

Dp has also done 5 consecutive days AF. He says he feels worse for it but he is sleeping a lot better and looks better already.

Whatever your motivation for wanting to cut down it's definetly been worth it for me so far. I suspect it will get harder again at some point. Am already anxious about summer. We love sitting outside with a glass of something nice. But I am just focusing on each day and each day in relation to that week.

So my week starts Monday. I tell myself I can drink 2 nights this week. I know I will be drinking on a friday. But the other day doesn't matter. But once it's gone it's gone. It really helps me as I am not saying I can't.

I also set an unofficial limit of 1 bottle of wine and 3 g and ts for the week. That's helping too. Last week I did drink 3 days as I had 2 small glasses of wine left but allowed myself as it was from my allowance.

And it's been much easier than dry January and at least this year I have stuck to it beyond January!