Should I advise my friend?

[FunPartyIdeas]

I don't know whether it's any of my business but...
I have an ex-colleague who is now a friend. She is younger than me - 30 (I'm mid 40s).
She is currently online dating and met a man last weekend for the first time f2f for the day. He is 34 ish. She has already told me she wants to marry him pretty much!
Anyway, she messaged me this morning to say he has come over from his place (about 1 hr away) to stay at her flat. He was there last night and slept in the living room.
Perhaps I'm being old but I worry about inviting a virtual stranger into her home? She has no parents to guide her.
Should I say anything?

But you’ll not be doing what you wish someone else had done for you because some people on the internet might be offended?

The poster whose advice you’ve decided to take. 🤷‍♀️

What would you say to her?

I'm 46 and categorically know they are!
Do you have a lot of dating experience? Perhaps you got lucky?

Many, many men are, yes. I would say most would take advantage of a situation.
Just ask the thousands of women who have been assaulted and / or raped by men they know.

Yes it is your business you are her friend and from what you say she might be slightly naive at best.
Point out your concerns to her explaining that you only have her best interests at heart.
X

Thank you. I feel she is and she has looked to me for advice in the past. I just want to word it in the right way. I care about her a lot x

I would just say that. “I don’t want to over step but was worried about you having a man stay over that you so recently met.”

Then let the conversation flow. You don’t need to convince her, just let her know you think it can be risky and that she’s important to you and you felt it would be remiss not to mention it.

Thank you. That's the sort of thing I was considering saying x

I think you should trust yourself, OP. It’s your gut. Better safe than sorry.

If a friend tried to lecture me, give unsolicited advice or judged my choices during dating, they wouldn’t be a friend for long.

If she asks for advice it’s different. You’re overly invested in this woman’s relationships and need to mind your business.

Nowhere did anybody say anything about a lecture. But I do think she doesn't necessarily understand risk here. She is pretty new to dating too.

She had a nice date, he stayed over and it all went well.

I don’t think at this point you saying anything is going to have even the tiniest impact. She’s probably my just very excited about seeing him again and she will barely even register what you’re saying.

If you do intend to say something, I think it maybe it should be in person (do you ever meet in person? ) and in the general course of a chat about him rather than an almost intervention style message.

As I say though - she has just met a man she’s really liked and had a successful date where he did stay over and anything untoward happened - so if you say something now, she won’t even hear it.

Side issue - she doesn’t sound a very nice or Christian person if she’d blame you for not saying something if a man assaulted her.