Normal stuff you wish you could do

[Darkdiamond]

Mine is wear jeans. I have the flattest, most rectangular shaped bottom and every pair of jeans (or any trousers actually) I have ever tried on look horrendous from behind. I have found jeans that look good everywhere but when I turn around its a different story. I just could not feel confident in jeans unless I jave a long top on over the top. I would love nothing more than to just throw on a t shirt and jeans because I just love that look but it looks awful!

The second is drive anywhere beyond my few tried and tested routes. I have been driving the same few routes for years and I cannot deviate from them. When I try its like I have been punched in the face: I can't think properly, all of the signs completely overwhelm me, I become so anxious my heart hammers in my chest and I make really rash and dangerous decisions out of panic. I go into immediate flight, fright or freeze mode and it feels like I am being made to.solve a really difficult calculation while someone is hitting me around the face. When I try to push myself out of my comfort zone (and I have) it usually results in people beeping at me and me pulling over to burst into tears. My tried and tested routes are completely fine and I am safe, careful and attentive on the road.

Anyway, those are two regular, run of the mill things that I feel like I cannot do.

What are yours?

God, I can’t go a few hours without doing that 😄

Back pack/travel without crippling fear of toilet anxiety. I only really go on holiday to very well established areas, I don’t go off the beaten track, I would NEVER go on a long distance coach. I watch Race Across The World with envy, but it feels me with anxiety.

Stand in a static position.
I’m hypermobile and have to constantly adjust my stance while standing as my muscles just aren’t stable enough and standing is quite painful for my back, shoulders, hips and ankles.
You’d think standing still for 5 minutes was a normal, easy thing, but for me that can take a day to recover from.
I’ve been one very adept at subtly leaning against things or unsubtly just sitting down mid-conversation.

Put make up on
DIY
have a normal routine (3 autistic and dyspraxic children)
I would love to be able to work, it would be a break.

Be able to attend family events, but we dont usually get invited.

So many already mentioned

Ride a bike

Eat what I wanted

Drive (can’t drive for medical reasons). I was never a confident driver but it was enough to do my local-ish driving, but now I can’t drive and not sure I will again, it’s a pain.

Play a musical instrument

That'll do for now 😂

My main one is to make a phonecall!! No idea why I get such anxiety about it but I will avoid at all costs. Genuinely have to give myself a talking to if there's no other option.

I prefer texting or messaging people rather than phoning them up. I used to be on the phone a lot , but that’s another thing that is easier to do by other means for so many things now.

To look normal in a group photograph rather than a potato with infinite chins. I always think I looked okay in the mirror too.

Drive without thinking everyone is going to pull out on me at junctions (ever since it did happen at a certain junction).

To not blush profusely when speaking in meetings at work. I also have hyper hydrosis which is horrendous.

Oh I have toilet anxiety too. I can’t go anywhere if I don’t know where the toilets are.

This though I can drive but not great at parking been watching how to park on instagram videos and think yeah I’m going out to find two cars and have a go at that but then chicken out

Swim really well.
Paint like an artist
Play the piano well.

Long distance coaches usually have a loo.

Kneel on the floor. I just saw Maureen Lipman do it during an interview and shes 13 years older than me. Arthritic knee prevents it. See also
Get up from the floor
Sit on the floor
Sit on anything low
Walk comfortably up hills
Dance, jump, do anything high impact.

Ride a bike.

Maybe adhd - I can’t remember the last time I didn’t let peas boil over. My impatience makes me put them on high heat and then my distractability makes me walk away. Every bloody time.

Not interrupt
Not spend all my money
Like things just a bit
Not be impulsive and book flights randomly
Say no to people
Obey rules
and my biggest one, be on time!

Why not set the timer on your phone?

Did you do metalwork and woodworking at school? I did in Year 7 and also learned how to change a plug in Physics.

Wondered if they’ve stopped teaching these things as it gives you confidence to use tools.

You don’t need to let peas boil in a pan. Boil the kettle, pour water over the frozen peas, cover with something and leave.

If you boil the kettle first would that help? Small amount of water, the pan would come back to the boil almost straight away

You can also cook peas in the microwave.

Sit comfortably
walk distances
stand for periods of time

I'd love to sleep through the night and wake up refreshed.

And not feel abject terror on high things (bridges, hills, buildings, theme park rides- even six rungs up a ladder). It irks me that people can stride confidently along cliffs admiring views and I have to get my sons or partner to take pictures to show me how stunning it all is.

Keep my house clean. It's not actually dirty, but it never looks spotless like other people seem to manage.

@Strawberrycheesecake7 and all others who are dsypraxic and wishing they could drive. I’m dsypraxic and I can drive. I’m 52 now and passed at 27 after 6 tests. I have a theory though. I don’t think me and many people like me should be able to drive. We deeply struggle and I think it’s a blessing most of us don’t pass. I did and struggled for decades forcing myself to drive places and feeling super anxious, always getting lost, always feeling like I was having near misses, and just generally being super shit at driving, and feeling like an idiot. Got diagnosed at 47 and it all made sense. I’m now way way kinder to myself, I drive a new smart car (cos it’s easy to park and get around) and I literally only drive round my area within a few miles. I just refuse to put myself under that level of stress anymore. Life is too short! That diagnosis gave me the permission to say ‘enough’ and that I wasn’t stupid - my brain just works differently. Can’t tell u the relief i felt.