People with really loud voices, what causes it?

[basoon]

Is it upbringing? Some sort of biological thing with vocal cords? We all know the experience of being in a cafe or restaurant and one person's voice just dominates the whole space. I have a very loud friend. Sometimes I'm embarrassed to be with her. She is aware, to some extent, but seems unable to do anything about it. Is there anyone here who knows they have a loud voice but can't modulate it?

I think many of them are - and because they've never been told to quieten down by their parents or because we're too polite or too scared in the UK to tell a stranger to pipe down, they just continue.

@Ruthietuthiethis is very true. I find it bizarre how loud people from US are. I find it very difficult to be around. I worked there for a period in hospitality and it was an issue in reverse. Everyone constantly telling me to speak up. I never encountered that issue before but it was a busy loud environment where I had to talk over others to be heard. It was a massive relief to land on home soil and be able to speak comfortably again.

Fuck knows but there were 2 lots of women in Next today
Jesus their loudness was oppressive

Youngest of 5 kids- I had to talk loudly to be heard. I’ve tried being quieter but just can’t manage it.

I'm fifth of six and my DH is fifth of nine, neither of us have loud voices.

My mum was one of 5 children - none of her brothers and sisters had loud voices 🤷‍♀️

So, she is partly deaf or neurodivergent.
Likely partly deaf, as ND usually is louder in louder environments, because there is too much noise estimulation and the brain struggles to differenciate between their own voice and the background.
You could suggest to have a trip to Specsavers for a hearing test.

I wish there was a socially acceptable way of asking people to be quieter without sounding rude and obnoxious yourself. I had a student training with me and we were in a quiet environment and I said its important to be quiet here, and he kept asking questions in a booming voice. I replied quietly but he didn't pick up on it and I was getting stressed out and my colleague was shooting him dagger looks, but I couldn't think of how to tell him to shut up without sounding rude. Im sure he didn't realise and I am sorry now I didn't say it more directly. He was young and needed guidance.

By far the worst I’ve heard lately was an all female group of fairly young women on a train - all evidently fairly well-oiled already, mid afternoon.

I speak very loudly and am not deaf, I’m aware of it so try to remember to volume adjust, but sometimes have to be reminded. I’ve been told I’m shouting and I genuinely am not, might just be speaking slightly more forcefully. If I shout my husband tells me it hurts his ears. My dad is loud, as was his mum and so is my sister. My mum is not! I have a friend who is so softly spoken I have to practically lip read to hear her. My hearing tests (had them for work) always say I have good hearing, so I don’t know what it is that I cannot hear my own volume. Strangely I hate music and struggle to pick out peoples voices when music is on in the background so maybe that’s a cause. Maybe I don’t have the wiring to differentiate between talking and background noise. I really hate that I am loud also.

Definitely and it runs in families too, hence some families speak loudly. For those who suggest it's performative that makes sense too it's often part of the mask NDs wear

It's difficult. I suppose the best I can think of (although still awkward with somebody who is clearly not a small child) would be to keep stressing that it's strictly 'indoor voices' only - i.e. emphasising the kind of voice that everybody is required to use rather than outright saying that HIS voice is unacceptable.

He probably wouldn't/couldn't change it anyway, mind. It seems ridiculous to have to tell people (other than very little kids) that they aren't allowed somewhere just because they can't stop shouting!

They probably don't know how to. Like the person who mentioned the loud colleague who has a loud voice and regularly bumps into doorframes..that's part of being neuro diverse too. Always clumsy. I've been so since I was in my baby walker but not officially diagnosed in my 50s

I have sympathy because im naturally very quiet, it requires a lot of concentration and effort to try and speak louder, and feels like im shouting, so I can imagine the reverse is true for people who naturally have higher volume.