Tutor turned up at my house at 9.45pm over a negative Google review – what would you do?

[Booyou123]

Hi everyone

I’m still quite shaken up by this and would appreciate some thoughts and perspectives.

My son attended a private tutor for about a year at the start of Year 5 for the 11 plus exam. After we stopped using her services, I left an honest Google review based on our experience. It wasn’t abusive or offensive, just a negative review.

The tutor was extremely upset by it. She repeatedly called me and my husband, sent so many emotional voice notes and messages, and even contacted my sister-in-law (who also has used her tutoring services) multiple times because she knows her. She told my sister in law that if I don’t take the review down, she’s calling the police as I am violating her business.

The part that has really terrified and shocked me is that she then turned up unannounced at my house at around 9.45pm. She was banging on the door and windows, demanding to speak to me about the review. She was absolutely hysterical, crying and sending me messages begging me to take the review down.

My children were in the house and ran upstairs because they were scared. My son was crying and very frightened, and asked why his teacher was there banging on the door.

I called the police afterwards and was advised to document everything. They couldn’t deploy anyone as they had some major incident in Woolwich, London. They told me that if there were further incidents, the behaviour could potentially amount to harassment.

Since then, she has sent a message apologising for coming to my house, saying she will never do it again and won’t contact me further.

What is bothering me most is that she only knew where we lived because of her professional relationship with our family. I can’t get past the feeling that using a client’s address to turn up at their home over a Google review is a huge breach of professional boundaries, maybe even DBS and goodness knows what else.

Part of me thinks I should just accept the apology and move on. Another part of me feels this was so inappropriate that I should take it further. She’s a woman who runs a professional tutoring company, and she was completely unhinged.

What would you do in my position?

Are you one of those “parents”?

You mention timelines. Was your ds not learning as quickly, or as well as you liked? Was the something that cropped up, his score on a mock?

Well a bad review could destroy her earning ability.
not saying you shouldn’t leave a bad review but I’d guess she is stuffed now to take it so badly

Also just to add you can have the best tutor in the world, your kid can be bright and your kid can still fail. Prepare yourself OP - this one if it happens will be on no one else but your son.

I have seen kids nailing Evwry practise test, be described as bright, do very well in school and still fail - and because of all this the tutor was blamed when they had done a great job.

OP reading your posts which of course are only snippets I really wonder why you felt the need to be vindictive. You told the tutor and were happy after a year. You effectively lied to her about how happy you were with her services for a long time. She was unacceptable but I think you caused this.

She sounds unhinged. I’d definitely be leaving another review though and make sure people know about this behaviour.

I’d also report her to the police. Presumably, she needs a clean DBS if she wants to keep running her business and working with children. The police having a word with her should shut her right up. Or it will help to paint an ongoing picture of problematic behaviour that may ultimately lead to something that will ping on her DBS. She doesn’t sound like someone who should be working with children frankly.

Whether you’re right or not with your criticism of her work, this isn’t safe or acceptable behaviour.

The best thing she could do for her business would be to respond to the review saying sorry that was your experience and she will take all your feedback on board and make changes to ensure a better experience for future customers. What she did was totally out of order and even possibly insane.

Is she chavvy OP? She sounds it. Tbh I would call the police and see if you could report her. She shouldn’t be anywhere near children.

Police only need 2 harassing calls/texts/whatever for a harassment notice to be applied. As this person has actually visited your home Id be afraid of her repeating an attack, or doing similar to another non positive reviewer? I would in all honesty, probably discuss this more with police.

Like I said, (for those who have not read the entire thread) I approached her directly first via email
and phone. I have also detailed our experience in a google review, which I am entitled to do. I don’t believe I deserve someone banging on doors and windows at our house, that is not acceptable.

I don’t need to go into the details of what exactly happened, and what my concerns are. If you feel like you’re on this thread and you need more detail to reply, then I’m afraid you’ll be disappointed.

Omg what is wrong with you? Is she chavvy? Jeez.

There are some horrible people around. Totally devoid of empathy.

Yes and no. I occasionally have to respond to some fairly batshit reviews, where clients had unrealistic expectations. (Different industry). It’s often an opportunity to respond publicly and advertise your services. If I were the tutor I would go with a version of, thank you for taking time to leave feedback, it has been a pleasure to tutor Jack for the last year and I am sorry that you think - specific complaint. As I explained…. And … wishing Jack all the best for his exam.

That is surely a better approach than going round people’s houses.

@Booyou123

Hmmm, now people are asking you awkward questions, you're refusing to give any answers. It seems there may be more to this than meets the eye. (And as some posters have said, I would LOVE to hear the tutor's version of events!)

I wish the tutor all the best, but dread to think what awful reviews await her online if your son fails his exams. I think she should start seeking legal advice.

!

Where would be the point of an online review forum if nobody felt able to leave a bad review?

So you're so sure in the righteousness of what you did, why make the thread?

People here are asking the questions because on the face of it your behaviour doesn't appear reasonable to everyone.

You’re perfectly within your rights to leave a negative review, and at the time I presume you felt safe to do so. I would take this further OP, she’s dangerous.

The whole point in reviews is that people can leave both positive and negative reviews. Whenever I see a business owner react seething to a bad review I don't use that service or visit that establishment, I can overlook the odd bad review. It says a lot about them not being able to accept criticism and how they actually behave towards their customers if they are ranting and raving (I have seen this several times). If there is 1 bad review amongst 30× 5 star reviews you know that person probably was either v fussy or the business was having a bad day. If you see that 10 plus people left similar reviews well there is a reason for that not just awkward customers. 1 review won't ruin a business, her reaction is utterly batshit.

BUT if I was wanting to use a tutor I'd like to hear about this incident and take a vv wide birth. I'd give a further factual review just to warn other parent's. She is utterly unhinged and I wouldn't want her anywhere near my children.

You have already reported her so if she tries it again she is likely to find herself arrested. Block her phone number and on all social media accounts.

Since when is a negative review hate speech ? What a ridiculous statement.

This is bonkers. OP leaves a negative (but according to her, which is all we have to go on, "factual") review, tutor reacts wildly inappropriately, loses her shit and frightens OP's children - and people's response is to tick off the OP for leaving the review, assuming she was unfair or unreasonable.

This makes me curious - what on Earth is the point of a review site at all, if customers are only allowed to leave positive ones and any negative ones are taken as inherently wrong or unfair?

The OP said that there were other, positive reviews on the site. So it will be up to readers to balance the positive with the negative as they see fit, and she won't have single-handedly destroyed the woman's business. As long as her comments were a fair description of her experience and didn't say anything untrue or misleading, why should they not be made? The point of a review site is to give potential customers information to work with, not to act as uncritical free advertising for businesses no matter what they're like.

Weird.

I don’t think it matters why the OP wrote the review, what it said etc, the bottom line is the tutor shouldn’t have shown up to her house!

I would suggest that banging on someone's doors and windows at 9.45pm, knowing young children are in the house, is a tad more than "stress"
She sounds dangerous imho and if she does it again it needs 999 call

One negative review wouldn't ruin a business and OP leaving one negative review, isn't trying to destroy someone's business

what an unhappy miserable person you are to cause this much upset and distress whaaaat? OP has been harassed/ had someone coming to her house and she's the one causing upset and distress?

My parents were very poor so they prioritised getting us dc into a grammar school because they understood the value of a good education and everyone of us passed the 11 plus.
Every weekend a few months before the exam was due they made us complete practise test papers.
I'm proud of what they did for us.
Tbf though we were all clever and had bright families but my dm and aunts and uncles had all passed for the grammar but weren't allowed to go ( abusive df).
There's nothing to stop poor families getting there bright dc into a grammar school, they don't need a tutor just engaged parents who can use the Internet to access practise papers.

Did you read the reviews others posted before hiring her to tutor your child?

👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

for the sake of “warning” other parents , someone’s life could have been destroyed

she might have visited you yesterday @Booyou123 to beg you to take it down or she would be ruined financially, MH wise etc

she messed up, have some empathy take the review down and give her a chance

Her behaviour is totally unacceptable. If she doesn't contact you again, I would leave it. If you take it further (how?) you run the risk of escalation. Hopefully with the police involvement she has backed off permanently. Do you have a ring doorbell/cctv? I would be cautious about your home security for a good while!