How can I deal with my adult daughter refusing to wear a seatbelt?

[IdaSpare]

Please help, I'm at the end of my tether, my 21 year old daughter who will not wear a seatbelt either driving or as a passenger. She was always brought up to wear it and everyone else in the family always wears one. I think it's a sensory thing as she has always been very difficult about changing clothes or dealing with zips and labels etc but if she is going to drive a car, she has to wear it. It's quite unusual for me to be in a car with her anymore but every time recently I have been, I've had to tell her to put it on. I know she goes straight back to not wearing one when I'm not there. I've resorted to threatening to call the police on her myself but short of taking her keys off her I don't know what to do. I'm hoping I can show her this and she can realise how reckless and stupid she's being. Please, if any of you have any pearls of wisdom to share about dealing with a stubborn, know it all daughter, I'd be so grateful.

...err, no she isn't...

Probably hasn't seen some of these videos to be honest. I'm pushing 40 and these were out when I was young. I can't remember the last time I saw a car safety advert on TV. So at 20 something theres every chance she hasnt seen some of the darker ones. We used to have police come to school and do presentations and displays, and we went to visit a fire station to watch a graphic reconstruction of a car accident, I doubt these things happen any more either.

My post stated “she’s endangering her own life”, im
sorry your friend witnessed that, but the facts remain that resources will not allow “markers” on a national level for people not wearing their seatbelts. I also think that seatbelt or not, your friend witnessed many awful incidents. Not just down to seatbelts.

….err, yes she is!

WHY IS ANYONE ARGUING THAT NO SEATBELT IS FINE????

Jesus Christ.

A pp suggested that it wasn't that dangerous to not have a seat belt on.

So I said, if it's not dangerous then don't bother strapping in your own kid s

someone else then said their child would sit perfectly still .. as though them wriggling around whilst driving is the issue... so I reminded them the issue of not wearing seatbelt is more to do with what happens in the event of an accident

And now you decide to mention that no child would sit perfectly still so it's a pointless comparison???

The point is, and always was, and always will be.... WEAR A SEATBELT!

People are so fucking stupid.

Oh, so if she sits in the back seat and crushes and kills the person in the front seat... Thats only her life that's endangered...?

Or if she flies out if the windscreen and hits someone else and injures/klls them because a 70kg object flies into them at 50mph.... That's only her in danger?

Stop being so fucking stupid.

Watch the "she knew her killer" video posted earlier....

A different seatbelt ad.

I think you need to accept that she’s a grown adult and isn’t always going to do things the way you want her to. Yes, she’s being a fool, and of course you can make her belt up in your car, but in her own car you really can’t expect to dictate to her. I get why you’re worried of course, but she’s 21 and this isn’t really your business. Adults are allowed to choose the risks they take.

If it is valid. It won’t be. Daughter’s choices invalidates it.

Has she seen videos of the consequences of not wearing one?

People can refuse to take her as a passenger unless she wears her belt, then - exactly as the OP says she does.

The OP is complaining about her not wearing a belt as a driver, in the car the DD owns, pays for and drives herself.

I once got pulled over at that age by the police and got a fine.

I still didn't listen as I thought the policenan was very harsh so I rebelled against it.

Months later I was pulled over by a different police officer. He was very fair with me. This officer didn't fine me, but he did tell me a horror story if a young girl who died in a fatality. This was a true story that This officer was involved in as he had to tell her parents that she ended up through the windscreen 100s of yards down the road she was travelling and tragically died instantly.

EVERYONE PLEASE USE YOUR SEATBELTS. IT REALLY DOES SAVE LIFES.

If its a sensory thing, could you get her one of these? https://www.lambland.co.uk/product/genuine-sheepskin-seat-belt-cover/?www.lambland.co.uk/products/hides-rugs/&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=18005234864&gclid=Cj0KCQjwio_RBhDMARIsAJPveNOTc1MxgE5WMdJC1FVdxzrfrRYnhFCQEHwFBEhDwmFyuao7OSvartAaAgHoEALw_wcB We got my DGM one when she had a PICC line in and it made sitting with the seatbelt on much more comfortable for her.

Exactly! Comprehension on MN is abysmal!!

Yes people are fucking stupid, some of them don’t even read the OPs posts on MN threads.

More dangerous than many thing such as???

This
I don't accept "don't the police have better things to do"
Road deaths creep up year by year and it is a policing issue
I had ny car marked for a few years after I got mu number plates stolen outside my house
Would be pulled over by the police every few months to verify it was me

You might not accept it, but I dont believe they’ve got sufficient resources.

Remind her that Princess Diana would probably be alive if she had worn a seat belt.
The only person who survived that crash was the only one wearing a seat belt.

Road deaths are not creeping up at all, they're largely flat.

Many things are more dangerous than this, drink driving and use of mobile phones which I see day in, day out.

Tell her that if she crashes she will be sent through the windscreen and be severely injured or killed.

If she can't wear a seatbelt she isn't a safe driver. She shouldn't travel in a car, ever. This is true of a significant number of people it's insane how "essential" driving is treated as being.

This I'm rural and there was a young man ( mid 00s ) who had suffered life changing injuries in a crash through dangerous driving.
He was part of "the slow down boys " charity.
Where young people caught joyriding/ speeding etc would spend the day with him
He was amazing ... he would draw them In

Let them brag about their cars.
Their speed
Bravado
He would them take them into his bedroom /bathroom
Ask them to sit in the hoist /bath chair
Ask then how they would feel if they were naked being washed by a carer
As that was his reality
The silence
They would become v subdued after that
I wish they would bring the scheme back

They are going up year after year in Northern Ireland