I hurt my baby co sleeping

[Bumpyroads]

Baby is a terrible sleeper, we co sleep and I feel very sleep deprived.
I have always talked in my sleep however last night I had a nightmare and got very angry in my sleep.
We were co sleeping and baby was sleeping in the crook of my arm.
I bit him in my sleep hard on his eyebrow, I woke up immediately to him crying I thought I had bitten his eye and immediately started shouting at my husband to turn on the light. Im so upset about it he has red teeth marks which will probably leave a bruise.
Not sure I can tell anyone in real life so posting here

You are going to have to stop cosleeping as this is a really dangerous situation. You could cause significant harm if your dreams are this disturbing. What if you tried to strangle him?I also think you need to make a gp appointment and be honest about your situation.

Backs up the many reasons you should not co sleep . Unconscious people are unpredictable. Mine have all been bad sleepers but i had a cot next to me and just had to deal with it . Better to be safe then do something so mad as bite a baby .

There is no point beating yourself up about it. Be cautious with bites. If you think it needs medical attention go and have baby checked. I think they can easily get infected.

I have very occasionally had times where I've done funny things in my sleep (think waking up with my head at the foot end of the bed or having rearranged things on my bedside table). Because of this I never coslept with my daughter when she was a baby as I couldn't be confident that I might not put her in harm's way. You might want to consider stopping co sleeping.

Have you taken baby to be checked out?
I agree with pp, sort out a different sleeping arrangement for tonight.

That must've been scary OP.

You'll need to get him checked out and obviously stop co sleeping now.

Hope he's ok

The skin is not broken do you still think it needs checking?
Co sleeping was the only way we were getting any sleep it will be very hard to stop at this point. Im not sure what to do im worried if I stop I will end up falling asleep while feeding him sitting up which could be even more dangerous.
I really am that tired im wondering if its even normal. Baby is 11 month and has always woken several times a night.
I have spoken to the health visitor and there is not really much support that can be offered as he's just really hard work.

Lesson learned
Back in a cot and sleep train
as for falling asleep while feeding, mitigate this by feeding standing up or in a really uncomfortable seat

We had to hold my 2nd baby all through the night in shifts for a year, then we were able to feel safe co sleeping, but co sleeping is more like 2 beds pressed together, plenty space and separate single duvets are best. Then as soon as possible get toddler/ young child into own single bed and you can either sleep on floor until they sleep or you can room share. If baby skin not broken the bruise will heal, however you can not do this again! So change the set up today.

I co sleep so I am not against co sleeping when done correctly however, you are not a safe person for the baby to sleep with. My DP has outbursts like yours so he sleeps in the spare room and never with the baby. You need to protect the baby, next time you might do some serious damage though biting his eyebrow is bad enough.

Can you get your partner to help more, ie: they co-sleep some times so you can get a full night's sleep on the sofa or spare room.

Having such vivid nightmares like this is a sign of clinical exhaustion so dealing with the underlying challenges will help prevent re-occurence.

Ignore the seamers on co-sleeping. Many many people cosleep for a variety of reasons. In Japan for example, they have lower rates of SIDS and generally improved medical outcomes for babies and co-sleeping is absolutely the standard. It's not inherently dangerous unless you are a drinker or drug user and not saying on the thread.

If you are, you don't need to tell us, but also don't co-sleep because that is dangerous.

What? Do you have a sleep disorder, op? That's not normal at all.

This kind of activity when asleep is a contraindication for co-sleeping unfortunately. You really can't continue to co sleep with him.

At 11 months old, you can work on getting baby into his own cot or cotbed, both you and your husband can work on it so you aren't both sleep deprived.

Omg. Baby in cot. No other option.

Sorry but you sound like a person who has never actually experienced this. All this advice doesn't work in real life for some people. I tried doing with my second and was so exhausted I fell off the uncomfortable chair and he fell on the floor - my muscles literally gave out with exhaustion. He was more harmed from me trying to do this advice than he was being cuddled to sleep in the bed.

If you get baby checked out you will for sure be referred to social services. I'm not saying you shouldn't get him checked out if you think he needs it but be prepared if you do. Don't feel bad about co sleeping it's perfectly natural. It's just that now you know you can't do it again. Could you get a cot right by the bed instead?

I think more normal than you'd guess. People just don't talk about it. My partner sleep talks whole conversations sometimes, I've lashed out before or sleepwalked and done strange things. Walked naked into housemate's room at uni which was awkward. Woken with odd bruises where I've obviously gone walkabout in the night and bumped into things.

get a floor bed and snuggle them to sleep then roll away. But don’t stay there all night if you do things like that in your sleep it’s not safe x

With respect OP, you are going to have to sacrifice your sleep for the safety of your baby. No one here is going to advocate for you to continue cosleeping when you have had a dangerous situation arise. It doesn't matter that it wasn't your fault. If you continue to do something, knowing there is a risk from previous experience, it does then become your fault.

Let the baby sleep next to you in a cot.

I never slept with my children, as infants, because I worried I might roll over on them, they might fall off, they could be suffocated etc. So, even without biting them, I knew there were dangers.

Sleep train. Cold turkey CIO if needed.

I actually just think I am exhausted. Like right now I feel like I could nap for hours and still not feel rested its a horrible almost drunk feeling.
Which is why giving up the co sleeping also scares me as I have no idea how I will cope with even less sleep.
I actually have a member of the health visiting team coming round tomorrow for a "talking session" i think she is one of their nurses. This is supposed to be just to get things of my chest as they know i have a very unsettled baby. I have no idea whether to tell her or not because im scared she will think im not safe.

Well co sleeping is not recommended.

Your baby needs to sleep in a cot. This is very dangerous. Co sleeping is the easy option and unfortunately you're going to have to do it the hard (and safe) way.

Currently you’re not safe. But that isn’t your fault and it is their job to help you and find strategies to make this situation better.
It’s not a case of ‘she’s now not safe sp the baby is removed’. That’s in nobody’s interest. It’s more ‘this situation isn’t safe, what support is needed’

If you have a partner, he needs to do night feeds too for a start.

If it makes you feel better, my husband punched my toddler whilst co sleeping and having a nightmare . And I’m a social worker 😬

Sounds like you are on your knees, sending hugs

Yes but this lady is clearly not compatible with co sleeping. She bit her baby so hard it’s left a mark on his face. She simply cannot co sleep with him again. I’m not running co sleeping down but this is a unique situation.