Do 99% of men think about someone else while DTD?

[Salsa2026]

Just that really. Lots of people, here and in general say things like, “all men fantasise about other women during sex at the very least sometimes”. And when I say all I really mean the vast majority, as there can always be an exception to everything.

If it’s true I think it’s quite grim tbh and makes me glad I’m not in a relationship. I’d want a man to be all about me 🤣

I have no reason to think that and it didn’t play out like that at all - it was a very secure relationship

he was a lovely man 😍😍

But then you’d both be two very similar looking women and he likes you both? 😂 🫤

Yeah I didn't read your comment as you telling yourself that you had literally/ objectively the best ever arse etc. Or that he thought that. More that they were his favourite ever.
I don't think that my DP thinks I have the best body in the world (he's mental if he does!) but I still think I'm his favourite person in the world, physically, mentally, emotionally.

I’d only feel that way if I felt the man wasn’t that into me. But then I think I could avoid that kind of situation, where he is settling…. then again, so many on this thread are saying, ‘but he could just be lying and you wouldn’t know’.

Yes not at all - yes they were his favourites because they were connected to me! Objectively defo not the best ever

yes and we had the being each others number one fan - I really miss it - I feel lucky to have experienced that kind of love - and it’s set the benchmark going forward now he’s not here anymore 😇

Is there a such thing as an ‘objectively’ perfect body though? Some men want athletes, some Christina Hendricks. And there are obviously other body types between and around that.

Him not being “into you” says nothing about your worth - I think you’d do better to separate them - it would be his tough luck to not see all that you are - but hey ho horses for courses

I defo think you sounds like you are lacking some self love 🥰

My husband thought MO Mowlem was very sexy!! Even just before she died

it’s because she was so sexually free - he found that very sexy

it’s like pp said - you are their favourites not the best objectively

If it makes you feel insecure then that's a whole other issue.

Have you not been in a long term relationship? Because that strong physical attraction ebs and flows as you go through various stages of life with a person, for both of you, at different times. It's unrealistic to think it will be constant like that for 20+ years. Love is what bonds you together through all of that, wanting to be WITH the person, not just the sex, but sharing all the parts of your life with them. Which is why it's more than just roommates as well.

It sounds like you need to work through some things if you want a long term relationship. Or you happily remain single/ dating - only you can truly answer which of those it is.

Had to Google Mo Molam. That’s an unusual crush. Did she face a reputation as being sexually free? Thought she was an MP.

She was - she was instrumental in getting the Good Friday agreement

he found out somewhere about her sexuality

I’m gonna Google it!

you can be an MP and like sex too 😂😂 esp if Tory you need a fetish 😂😂

She's a bloody legend. One of my heroes

Found this

Agony Aunt" Role: In 2004, she became an "agony aunt" for Zoo, a weekly "lads'" magazine, where she discussed sex and relationships, joking at the time that her personal sexual preferences were not relevant to her ability to listen to and advise young men.
Advocacy: While her personal sexuality was heterosexual, she was a strong supporter of lesbian and gay rights, helping to break down barriers in Northern Ireland and supporting Stonewall. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5]

Love is what bonds you together through all of that, wanting to be WITH the person, not just the sex, but sharing all the parts of your life with them. Which is why it's more than just roommates as well.

I'll say it again - not because I disagree with you. But there are women on here (and men) who are in sexless marriages and who consider sex the most important part of their relationship and that without it they do just feel like roommates.

Did I say that....no! I said that he will have done at some point.

Dig deeper and you are sure to find a lot grossed.

Oh I’m so glad to hear

he really loved and respected women and thought she was amazing

along with Helen Mirren 😍😍

Only time I ever imagined someone else when I was having sex with my partner ,was when I was going completely off of him & he didn’t do it for me anymore 🤷🏻‍♀️.
It’s diff thinking about somebody else when you’re having me time .

I think meat and women fantasise all the time - whether alone or not

Men not meat! 😂😂

Lol I was going to say, I'm all about lifting women up (teaching OP to love herself and to appreciate Mo Mowlam) but we can do that without resorting to calling men meat 😂

I have every confidence that I’m my partners number 1, 2, 3, 4 and 5 etc.

I’d be very surprised to learn that he’s thinking of other people while he’s literally inside of me.

But on a wider scale, I’m not offended that he probably still finds other women attractive, or has a cursory glance at other women.

He might be happy and committed to me, but the man still has eyes.

You can disagree
You don't know though

😂😂😂

Right I’m off to bed…alone!!!

night night all

happy debating

A sexless marriage (i.e. am issue that has gone on for a long time for no real reason and where there is no end/ resolution) is very different to the ebs and flows of sex in an otherwise healthy relationship. E.g. when stressed or after childbirth/ miscarriage etc.

I can understand why those threads go the way they do.