Hen weekend …guests can’t wear white except bride ….bit silly ?

[luluxxx]

We are going to Spain next month for 4 nights for a hen do.
We have been sent a message in the WhatsApp group that no white allowed except bride.
At first I thought she meant no white outfits for the night outfits (which is totally fine ) but she’s said no white at all.
No white vests /trainers /bikinis/cover ups /linen trousers etc etc
Now most of my vests I wear under jackets are white and my trainers are white.
Shes specified no white at all
So I’m gonna have to rethink loads of outfits as a lot of skirts for day time match with a white vest.
My linen trousers for pool days are also white etc
Do you think this is a bit ott?
I mean trainers …I only own white trainers 🙈

A bit OTT?! This is completely ridiculous and no way would I comply. Are there any other bizarre and "compulsory" rules?

girl just ignore it. If your trainers are white (as many are) just wear them. Tell whoever imposed the rule that’s your not buying loads of new stuff because of a rule someone made up, tell them to grow up frankly.

I would be wearing my white trainers. You are going out of your way enough as it is. The rest, fine, wouldn't bother me too much (although would think bit OTT)

It’s ridiculous. Personally I would ignore it but I suspect that the kind of person who specifies this is so immature and shallow that they would actually throw a tantrum and “break friends” if they did. You could also send a note saying the only shoes you have are white, apologies in advance, though you’re happy to abide by the rest of the dress code, and see how that goes down?

Ascot or a wedding are short events - a day or so - and usually require only one outfit, @sweetpickle2 - they do not involve dictating a dress code for several days.

Good god! These are cringe levels of self-absorption and entitlement (to other peoples' attention/care/interest/time!).

Tell her how you feel so she uninvites you.

“Sorry ladies but I will be wearing white trainers, unless someone is going to pay for some new ones for me!”

I was going to say, try your best to go with it and it makes things fun for the bride. Then ive realised its the bride herself setting the rules 🤣🤣 thats very self absorbed! Run!! 🤣

100% I’m so glad I’m old sometimes!!

I’m in my 50s and for my hen - which I organised - we went for a meal, club then a few friends who were out of town or just fancied it, stayed at mine. Two of my close friends did the ‘extras add ins’ which were a surprise.
My DH went to a seaside town and had a laugh w his mates - football, beer, curry etc.

To add, I wouldn’t be buying new clothes for this do. Wear your trainers and vest tops!

I wouldn’t go if the bride was clearly less than interested in people just having a nice time, a just wanted some people as photo props. Fair enough if she wants to wear white dresses in the evenings and wants to be the only one, but no white at all the whole time??

I couldn't have put it better!

it’s ridiculous. the rule should only apply on the actual wedding day. I would wear what you want or not go.

I'm so fucking glad I was young in the 70's and 80's when hen parties meant a night at the pub or sometimes going out for a pizza. No rules, no hysteria and no social media.

I have to pity her future DP.

If this is what she does to friends she's had for ages and who've all paid for their own travel, I can't see her being accommodating enough to make the compromises necessary for a marriage to work.

When she gets round to the post-divorce tiktok extravaganza, be sure to get the dress code before shelling out more ££

I would just respond saying sorry, I only have white trainers so you’ll have to deal with those. Unless you want to buy me some new ones?

Hiding in a corner and wearing your white trainers, one hopes.😁

Trainers I can understand but surely you have tops in multiple colors and not just white. Vest tops are also pretty cheap to buy if you need to get a new one.

shoes is harder but can you wear sandals or other shoes instead.

Yeah, if you're a bridesmaid you must have some idea what she's like so you shouldn't have asked about trainers. How many people are going? I bet the wedding will be a lot of fun too.

I hope the bride realises that what matters is the wedding. And not the party. By all means have fun but this level of details and requirements suggests she is focusing on the party too much.

DD1 is getting married in July and I am so glad that she is not indulging in any of the ridiculous demands that so many brides put on their friends and family.
She has given her bridesmaids a colour to go and pick their own dresses because they are all different shapes and sizes (DD2 got one on Vinted for under £4) and she wants them all to be comfortable in what they are wearing.
The hen do will be a pottery painting session, probably followed by pizza or pasta in one of her favourite student friendly restaurants.
The wedding meal is a catering van and they are hiring a church hall for the reception.
It's their wedding and they want to do it their way whilst not expecting their guests to go to great expense.

Social media has so much to answer for. I just cannot imagine being friends with anyone this self absorbed.

It is definitely OTT, but hen dos in general are OTT now a days!

It would be fine if it were just the outfits for the evenings as a lot of hen dos with do certain themes on an evening, bride in white, everyone else in black etc. but to say no white whatsoever even trainers is absurd and a unacceptable request. I am the same as you, I only own white trainers, I have a lot of white tops.

How close of a friend is she to you? I’m going to assume quite close if you’re going on her abroad hendo. Just be honest with her.

Take a couple of Poundland carrier bags to wear over your white trainers and tie them round the ankles with some string. That'll make your outfit colourful.