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Original poster

Am I making myself look silly socialising with younger colleagues at lunch?

154 replies

Needtoughlove · 10/04/2026 07:04

I am wondering about age differences in the office and what your take is on it.

I work in a team of 9 women. 3 of us are 45 and over and the remaining women ages range from 23 to 26.

I get on well with everyone. The two older ladies take their lunches at their desks whereas the younger ladies tend to go out to lunch.

I will sometimes go out for lunch with the group. It is not a clique group and is very much open to whoever wants to go. They are all getting mortgages and settling down and we talk about all sorts. I do have children in their 20’s so sometimes feel old when I reference something they are doing but I wouldn’t say uncomfortable.

I had a meeting with one of the other older ladies and we were just chatting and it was referenced that they was an age disparity in the office. I said that I didn’t really feel it and she said “well that’s because you are always trying to be down with the kids”. I pulled her up on it straight away and she assured me that no one had said anything but from her perspective, she felt it strange that I wanted to hang out with the 20 somethings. I assured her that they were colleagues and it was just nice to get out of the office at lunch but now I wonder if I am making myself look silly.

It has me overthinking now. Are they just asking me along as they are nice people and don’t want to leave anyone out? Should I graciously bow out and take myself off for a walk.

OP posts:
impartialusername · 10/04/2026 20:51

I’ve often made friends with older women I work with in their 50’s when I’ve been in my 20s-30’s and socialised with them that’s pretty normal I would think? I don’t think you should care what anyone else thinks of it!

Greyhoundsmittenlady · 10/04/2026 22:51

Needtoughlove · 10/04/2026 07:04

I am wondering about age differences in the office and what your take is on it.

I work in a team of 9 women. 3 of us are 45 and over and the remaining women ages range from 23 to 26.

I get on well with everyone. The two older ladies take their lunches at their desks whereas the younger ladies tend to go out to lunch.

I will sometimes go out for lunch with the group. It is not a clique group and is very much open to whoever wants to go. They are all getting mortgages and settling down and we talk about all sorts. I do have children in their 20’s so sometimes feel old when I reference something they are doing but I wouldn’t say uncomfortable.

I had a meeting with one of the other older ladies and we were just chatting and it was referenced that they was an age disparity in the office. I said that I didn’t really feel it and she said “well that’s because you are always trying to be down with the kids”. I pulled her up on it straight away and she assured me that no one had said anything but from her perspective, she felt it strange that I wanted to hang out with the 20 somethings. I assured her that they were colleagues and it was just nice to get out of the office at lunch but now I wonder if I am making myself look silly.

It has me overthinking now. Are they just asking me along as they are nice people and don’t want to leave anyone out? Should I graciously bow out and take myself off for a walk.

It's an admirable quality if get on with people of all ages. Don't change

tofumad · 10/04/2026 23:56

I'm the oldest in my office. I feel that I get in with everyone and have a bit of craic with them. I never worry that they are laughing at me, not with me. Age isn't everything.

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Heidi0307a12 · 11/04/2026 01:39

Absolutely not! This is a 'them' problem not a 'you' problem... this other older woman is speaking her OWN mind, not that of the younger one's... you do whatever you want, and remember... they're all just work colleagues, they're not your friends.

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