Neighbours are getting on my nerves already

[OneGreyBiscuit]

Had new neighbours in on Friday. They're privately renting and was told by landlord that it was a woman and her son, didn't sound too bad so I thought. Already it's people constantly going there (9am this morning), talking loudly. Now the son has been outside for the last hour bouncing a basketball and throwing it in a bin. I've just had to shut my bathroom window and can still hear it. I'm thinking they've only been there two days and I've had enough already. What would you do?

The thing is they're not the sort of people who you would think are going to be a nightmare, and I'm not saying they are. But these things niggle at me. I don't know if I seem a soft touch or something or maybe they hear a lot of noise from this house too. The trouble is the walls are so thin, I've even heard her sneeze. Just wish houses were built a bit better. Not that would've stopped the basketball episode the other night though. And my point with that was he's not even at school so why couldn't he have had his little session in the day. Idk maybe I'm just too sensitive to others noise?

And maybe they're not sensitive enough.

Truthfully, this is why I bought a detached house. I lived in a terraced house for years, had these problems and then moved to a semi. Had these problems.

Now, even with a detached, I have problems but at least they're not through a wall.

I wouldn't let people gaslight you about kids and balls, though. It is a problem, for many, but I find that people try to make it about those that are annoyed instead of those that are being annoying.

You were quick to mention that you knew the LL upthread. I frequently visit a LL forum where snitching neighbours are discussed with contempt. LLs are warned not to get involved in interpersonal disputes unless someobe is overtly breaking their lease. LLs who are unwise enough to do this can be accused of harassing their tenants and this is a legal minefield. A wise LL will tell you this and advise you that you must settle the matter between yourselves. LLs are only concerned where the matter might damage their property or involve the appearance of statutory bodies such as police or the LA.

Noise cancelling headphones could be your friend. Play the radio or TV when you are indoors.

I had a woman move in next door (rental) with a non stop yappy Pomeranian dog. It drove the whole neighbourhood crazy as in the Summer she'd leave it outside in the garden and go off to work for 8 hours. In the end she moved as everyone hated her and she'd been accosted by other neighbours in the street about her dog from hell. If she hadn't had the dog, she would have been a great neighbour as she was very nice, pleasant, friendly, chatty, etc.

Speak to a community mediation organisation who offer free mediation and coaching services. Google can provide contact details and most offer coaching services over Zoom. They can help you explore why you feel so upset by this behaviour and develop strategies to distract, refocus and take your mind off your neighbours behaviour.

Oh come on give them a break. They are excited about being in their new home and who doesn't have visitors over when they first move in.
For all you know the boy didn't have a garden in their last place so is enjoying being outside while the mum sorts out indoors .
Cut them some slack show some kindness and they could end up being the best neighbours you ever had!

Get lost. You have no idea how much noise a basketball being bounced and thrown into a wheelie bin makes. It's horrendous.

My neighbours children run around the house squealing at 11pm. The walls are paper thin.

Harsh. Just saying it might not always be like this. It might be the excitement of moving somewhere new.

Give it time and then guess what....talk to them politely.....might be the end of the nuisance.

Not harsh. You re being ridiculous.

Point is Hugh unless you are lucky enough to live in the middle of nowhere you are going to have noise from neighbours admittedly some noise is more annoying than other noise - I have all my windows open today and can hear the kids next door playing music it's fine - no problem at all.

But unless the OP is going to confront the neighbours (politely) it's not going to change.

So he either has to do that or put up with it and I was merely saying he should give it some time.
X

My neighbours have primary school age children. They make noise so I put up with it. I don't need to go to sleep early but that level of noise at 11pm is not acceptable.

The ones the other side used to kick footballs against the fence all day long and it was horrendous. The fence became so battered it had to e replaced and the endless noise ended.

What can anyone on here do to help you? Nothing.

Please go say hello. Explain about the noise and work out what can be done. You need to be flexible. 9am is not early, yes annoying but not early.

So, see if they can delay until a little later or gift them some artifical grass to put on the concrete so it reduces the noise.

Go out and join in.

Whatever you do, this is not illegal.

As regards music or noise from the street - it depends what and how loud.
It's a street. You don't need to be standing outside my house facetiming loudly at 7 am (this morning). You don't need to be putting glass bottles in your recycling in at midnight or 5 am.

The bouncing basketball or football against the fence isn't just noise, it's vibration too.

Go round and have a word - you'd get something thrown at you probably.

Unfortunately if the walls are so thin that you can hear your neighbour sneeze then this isn't really your neighbour's fault.

Agree that the ball bouncing at 9pm is annoying. However, can you not speak with the neighbour politely and explain that you need to be in bed by 9pm for work so would appreciate no ball bouncing after 8pm. Surely a considerate neighbour would be happy to comply with such a request. I know I would if I knew you had to be up super early for work.

What did he/his parents say when you asked if their son wouldn't mind bouncing the ball elsewhere, or at a different time, as the noise was disturbing you?

I've not said anything yet. I'm hoping the 9pm was a one off. I can't really say anything about any daytime noise unless it's relentless. If it happens again I will explain about needing to go to bed early for my work hours and hope she understands. I won't be rude or confrontational.

Surely if you hate neighbours all you can do is move. I can hear dc playing, dogs parking, a trimmer, chat etc It’s normal

It was 9pm. He's not a young child, I would guess between 14 to 16, so it's not like when they're small and you let them out early because they're complaining about getting outside.

I don't hate them at all. I don't know them to hate them.

Ok change hate for another word. You clearly are annoyed by neighbour noise so having neighbours will result in an issue.

Sorry I'm 51 years of age, I don't have the energy for basketball.

That is too late and antisocial

All our neighbours and our own kids have basket balls. We all also havr visitors at 9am or earluer, or sometimes late and sometimes a bunch of people over in our repective gardens.

These are all just normal life things.

If you want it quiet then move to a detached cottage in the country.

Don't judge people's usual behaviour on how they behave while moving home. It's very normal to have a lot more visitors and to be busy and leave children a little more to their own devices when you're in the middle of one of the most stressful life events. If they're noisy on an ongoing basis then review and think about a quiet word.

These comments about move into the middle of a field are not helpful or practical. I live in a housing association house, on which I've spent £2000 to carpet, that'll have to be ripped up if I get a swap and I don't want to swap as they're not as bad as that. As I've stated I just have a rant on here to let off steam. If I win the lottery, I would love to move to such a place as you're describing as I'm sure many people would.