Mother's Day Safe Space

[worldshottestmom]

Let's be having it, feel free to share how your mother's day is going/has been. Even if its been rubbish, at least we can have a laugh about it.

Mine started with DS smacking me in the eye winging, followed by him having a tantrum because my DD turned the washing machine on instead of him. Just walked into the living room to find DD pulling all clean washing off the drying rack and spitting crisps onto them.

I did get a nice handmade card off my DS though, which I adore! Going to order some nice food later and hope my washing and eyes make it through the rest of the day unscathed. Happy Mother's Day!

Omg I cannot even articulate how sorry I am for you. To have a disability, still be a dedicated mother and be treated and spoken to like that is utterly disgusting. Sending you the biggest hugs ever 🤗🫂 because that is unacceptable. Im so sorry. I hope it gets better for you but my god i don't know how you put up with that.

I have a DS4 who is autistic and very challenging. Obviously not in the same way as yours, but he's currently on his 5th tantrum of the day and has only just stopped hitting me. I hope it gets easier but idk that it will.

Enjoy your food and chill out in bed, you seriously deserve it ❤️

My kids are 17, 15, and 13 and haven't even said Happy Mothers Day.

DH gave them a talking to, so my 15yo DS went and got a card (no envelope) and my 17yo DD has been scrabbling asking if I want to go shoe shopping and she will contribute, 13yo DD has just avoided me.

I said its not about gifts (even though I gave them ideas weeks ago, even for a gift vouchers so I can get new books! And a gift would be nice) its about just recognition. I would have loved to walk indoors from training this morning (11.30am so not early) to the kids saying "happy Mothers day mum, sit down, we'll make you a cuppa and sort lunch for you). Instead my 13yo shrieked at me when I reminded her they need to do laundry and the 15 & 17yos are now crying saying they didn't mean to make me feel bad.

DH is asleep on the sofa.

You get that big glass of wine down you! Up early and ill on mothers day and cant even see your own mum, how rubbish. Guess it could be worse, but regardless you try and enjoy the rest of the day ❤️ Im gonna order some wine for myself now, you've twisted my arm haha

I think its more when you have (especially adult) children whom you have a good or at least amicable relationship with, youd expect them to at least show a little appreciation for all you have done and do. I know its a person's own choice to have kids, and they didnt ask to be born, its a mothers role to care for her children etc, but its more about being considerate of your mums feelings on a day that is supposed to be showing appreciation for her. Its the least they can do, you know?

As a fellow widowed mum I’m sending you 🥰 and 💐. It’s not easy and the most random things hurt.

Omg what a disaster for you, im so sorry. I dont know why its so hard for so many people to make the effort for the person who gets them through life and cares about them the most. Totally understand the upset at the lack of effort and appreciation.

It really isnt about the gifts as you said, itd just be nice to have those we dedicate our lives to to reciprocate that relationship by making an effort on this day. I so hope things get better for you, try and enjoy it the best you can. Sending hugs 🫂

Earlier this week, autistic DS was violent to a teacher at his specialist school, and used a word that still makes my toes curl up with shame. He doesn’t think he should be punished, but I do, so he went for me physically last night before trying to strangle me and telling me it was “my last day on earth”.

No MD flowers for me then. I’m hoping to sleep through the rest of today with the help of some much-needed diazepam.

Shit. It always is. H doesn’t care enough about anyone but himself to bother with it. The kids shame him into making a token effort but I’m matching his energy from now on. I’ll get a box of chocolates when they arrive since he lied about having ordered them in time, god knows about the card, and that’s it.

I think he’ll be shocked when Father’s Day passes the same way. I’ve successfully trained him into marking birthdays adequately, so this is the next step.

(Don’t say I should leave; there are reasons for staying).

Ive had a lovely set of presents from both teens. DD14 loves to decorate and make handmade cards which is very sweet. My only gripe (and I feel awful saying it) is that DH announces he and his 2 siblings are taking elderly MIL out for a roast this afternoon. So I'm at home cooking a roast for myself and 2 teens. Feel irritated but choosing my battles!

Omg how incredibly upsetting and difficult for you. You should not be subjected to that, but I get it, having a SEN son myself. Only 4 but he is very challenging. I cant imagine how mortified and upset I would be if it was him doing this. I so hope you're able to enjoy the rest of your day somehow, enjoy your rest and I really hope things get better for you in general. Really not nice having to go through that. Big hugs 🫂

How awful, im so sorry. You shouldn't be made to feel like that. My ex was the same but spent the day lecturing me on why its a waste of time effort and money and why I dont deserve it. Hence why hes my ex.

Good on you for not pandering to him in retaliation. He doesnt deserve your effort.

I hope youre able to get some joy out of the rest of the day, and dont pay any mind to your H, if you're able to, for the day.

Sending hugs 🫂 cos I know its shit.

Thats so sweet, really lovely of them to make you some cards and get presents, how thoughtful. I would also be miffed hes taking his mum out but not you. He should absolutely celebrate his mum, but he should celebrate you as well. You have a very mature approach to it, which I admire. Enjoy the rest of your day, bet you make a banging roast and its way better than wherever theyre going anyway lol.

I had a card with a lovely message from DD and a box of chocolates. She's 22. Nothing from DS who's 19 and at uni.

His name is on the card from DD but I'd have thought he could have at least sent a text.

I'm quite hurt and disappointed if I'm honest. He's very non communicative generally, takes days to respond to messages I send while he's at uni. He does sometimes respond to messages with a heart emoji so I guess he does care.

I have two teenagers now, boy who is 18 and girl who is 15. My son bought me some lovely pjs and vase and some lovely fake flowers as as he said”
so you don’t kill them mum !” lol 😂 I’m not very good at keeping plants/ flowers alive! they are beautiful and already have pride of place in my lounge. My daughter secretly rang her grandparents last week asking to borrow some money and has booked me and her a night away for a girlie night in Liverpool ! Feeling very loved 🥰 right now x

My children are superstars. My 5yr old came in first this morning wishing me happy Mother's Day and giving me a big cuddle along with my 1yr old. My 9yr old got up and made me pancakes by himself, and my 16yr old carried it in for breakfast in bed with a coffee, some yogurt and fruit. My 13yr old wrote out some gift vouchers for me, and my 11yr old gave me a miniature rose. I also got a Lego set. They are all truly wonderful.

However, today is the last of my 'firsts' without my lovely Mum. I lost her last April, and miss her with my whole being. I'm trying to keep my spirits up, but just want to have a good cry.

That's terribly sad 😔 I wish I could fix it for you

Fine in terms of my children they have showered me with homemade gifts and cards and husband has spoilt me and is very in tune. But I pine foe my mum who died nearly 6 years ago suddenly when I was heavily pregnant with my first baby

First mothers day without my children (divorced) although they popped round with exH for an hour. All pretty tense.

Thank you ❤️

I’m mostly eating halva and hibernating in the attic where the computer is, officially working but mostly reading fanfics. The kids are adorable and I’ll get a card from them when they remember!

I can see why your ex is an ex!

Busy morning I've heard from all of mine had flowers and thoughtful gifts, I will get the cards later. I've wrapped the presents grandson chose for dd and made the party food he wanted to surprise her with when they all arrive later. Hope I get chance of a long soak in the bath once they leave.

Today is my first mother's day as a mum. My partner is at work all day and won't be home till the morning. All I can think about is my own mum who died a long, long time ago.

Eurgh, this is the thread for me! Three children with ex husband and currently 39 weeks and 3 days pregnant with fourth (that 3 days makes all the difference!).

Ex did nothing for the kids for me even though I’ve done him so many favours the last few months. I’ve had them every weekend the last three weeks. We do 50/50 custody so usually two weekends each a month. Every parents evening etc.

Then there’s current dp! I severely scolded my hand this week so one hand has been out of action. All I wanted was for him to take the kids downstairs this morning and let me have a coffee in bed and for the kitchen to not look like a bomb has dropped on it when I came downstairs. It’s a struggle to clean it one handed with no marigolds! He did the coffee part but left all the kids bothering me upstairs while he drunk his tea in peace. Came downstairs. Kitchen is a state, kids want breakfast and I can’t clean it with the state of my hand. He announces he’s going to visit his mum and Nan 50 minutes away to take them Mother’s Day presents. I’ve spent the day refereeing arguments while trying to make sure the house is presentable as baby could come any day now while one handed. I’m sure he’s had a leisurely chat and tea with his Nan though!

Toddler greatly prefers dad to me at the moment ( I hope) so I feel like a fraud and a failure for anything mother's day-related.

Can you text him to pick up gloves on the way home? 2 pairs. He's going to need them once baby is here. Time for some domestic practice me thinks as he obviously has no clue. There is no way he is getting away with doing nothing from now on. You are going to have to be firm and state the bleeding obvious.
I am currently one handed. You need to help me prep for our baby. Buck up buttercup.

I’m getting my plans in place. I’ve put up with more than I ever should have 😊