When is this nightmare going to end?

[HaychEss]

RANT INCOMING… My baby is 5 months now and it has been hell since day one, not even exaggerating. My family and my husbands family have said that she is one of the most challenging babies they have known. Nothing works. It feels like she is just crying all the time and her sleep is also crappy. I feel bad for complaining because I once prayed for a healthy baby and now I feel like I can’t cope. It’s like everyone is getting on with their lives and I’m just stuck with a crying baby. I think I search ‘when do babies sleep through the night’ every other day! Tell me it gets better! What can i do to help baby settle and play better?

If you haven't already then switching to the big pram instead of the bassinet can help them be happier when out and about as can see.

I just lay flat in it when asleep - check you have kne that does thjs

Sorry you are going through this! I experienced the same, it was hell. I gave DD baby Optibac and it made such a difference. I think she had been uncomfortable.

I'm so sorry you're going through this, it sounds like one of mine, it was absolutely horrendous and she was politely described by everyone as "a challenging baby". I felt like I really missed out on the lovely baby experience that a lot of mums have where they could go for pram walks and go to baby groups...my DD just screamed the whole time. As a few have mentioned, it turned out to be CMPA for us and things improved a lot with special formula (and gentle sleep training a few months later). On the plus side, she was the best toddler and has been an absolute delight ever since.

on of my daughters was like that from birth til 2.5 years old, she cried n cried!
She only slept like 1 hour every day/night, then at 2.5 years old she didn’t cry as much but still didn’t sleep!

Have you considered weaning her and giving her a bit of solid food? She might be hungry, and some babies are ready for it earlier than others. I weaned DS at 5 months, he was massive and breastfed with CMPA and nothing filled him up.

DD was tiny and screamed from day 1 until she was 7 months. Even the HV said what an unhappy baby she was. I remember being the only mum walking her round the cafe as the other babies sat contentedly in their mum’s laps - the moment I sat down the screaming would start. She was refluxy but really she turned a corner when she could start doing things for herself and playing (7/8 months) - some babies hate being babies!

Either way there should be a big improvement in the next 3 months or so. It’s tough.

Hi OP,

You have my absolute sympathy. My eldest was exactly the same. We took her to all sorts of specialists to try and work out what was wrong with her. Paid a bloody fortune.

We often got sympathetic comments, including one child minder who said she had a baby who was a screamer and she’d had to ask the parents to split the care with another child minder because she couldn’t cope with it every day!

Her screams became like a screensaver in my brain. Even if she wasn’t screaming, I still heard it ringing around my head.

In the end, when she hit 6 months and started crawling and eating solid food she started getting much better.

Cut to 18 months old and she was the happiest toddler you’ve ever met. She never cried and no one believed me how awful she was as a baby!

Second cranialsacral therapy as another PP has said. Not expensive either but a game changer.

I had a crying, non sleeping reflux baby. It was hell. Everything terrifies him. I stopped going out, except to the park outside my house where I could run home if he cried and close the curtains and make everything dark and quiet to calm him down. Couldn’t do anything of the things other mums could. It was really miserable. I have hardly any happy memories of him as a baby. I do feel a bit cheated out of that experience.

i get it. It will get better.

My son was constantly crying, hated having the curtains open, and barely slept for more than 20 minutes at a time, for 6 weeks. I luckily knew a baby craniosacral therapist (very similar to cranial osteopathy) and took him for a session.

He fell asleep on the way home and didn't wake for 12 hours. It was like a miracle. He had one more session, but really, that single session sorted it. He wasn't a good sleeper til 5 months, but I could cope with that, without all the constant crying.

My son was like this. Wouldn't be put down, cried a lot, woke up every hour throughout the night for a feed. He slept through for the first time at 8 months. My 2nd baby (girl) was the opposite. It's so hard, esp the sleep deprivation. But it does get better, I promise. Mine are adults now, but I still remember how tired I was during those months! I reckon by summer your life will be totally different, just hang on in there.

Like others have said, look into cranial osteopathy. It's really gentle, they barely touch their head. It was a game changer for us. DC changed overnight.

Another vote for cranial osteopathy, it worked a miracle for my son. In the meantime hope you get some respite x

Sending big hugs!! It's so hard when you're tired and under external pressure to stay positive and I hope things improve for you.
From what I have read, babies who cry excessively can have neurodevelopmental issues. My son was difficult with sleep and feeding and he is 15 now and diagnosed with ADHD and Autism. This is not as scary as it sounds!! You can't have him assessed until he starts school but as he gets older it might be worth keeping a diary of developmental milestones and behaviours that are perhaps different to what is expected at his age. There's loads of reference material out there so have a Google and arm yourself with knowledge.

My friend had a baby like this and she was advised to take her to an osteopath. She did. Whatever they did it worked and her daughter was like a different child after one session.

Can here to say this. My son screamed and I mean screamed for 9 hours a day. Barely slept. It was a milk protein allergy.
my GP was amazing and spotted it quickly. (She had 2 kids with the same thing.)
Much love to you. Tough days.

Appreciate this is not practical advice but it might be helpful to know that my dd1 was a total nightmare on the sleep front. At one point I was so tired I literally couldn't string a coherent sentence together. On the other hand, she was a completely delightful teen. While my friends' kids turned bonkers for several years, she was utterly charming. Parenting is very much swings and roundabouts. Maybe this is just your most challenging period - everyone has them, just at different points.

Oh blimey,I had a baby just the same. She's 23 now and just had a baby of her own. It was such hard work,it completely put me off having another. At the time,It felt I was the only person in the world to have a baby that cried from the moment she woke up. I just had to ride it out but it was absolute torture at the time. Just sending you lots of love but you will get through it. Just hang in there.

Yes, swings and roundabouts. My middle son was very similar, never slept, screamed night and day, but became a sweet and easy little toddler. Youngest was a dream baby, slept well, no trouble, but his toddler years were a nightmare. Everything can change.

One of mine was like this and a friend bought me round “classic fm music for babies”’on cd (afew years back now!) you can probably download it
the music really helped get my daughter to sleep and I’d absolutely give it a whirl, along with black out blinds and getting them in their own room as soon as possible.

Dd2 was like this. Turned out to be reflux. Throw in whooping cough at 5 weeks old which caused issues and sleepless nights for the best part of a year - ex who did zero to help - fun times! She’s 13 now though and a delight. You’ll get through it. Push at the gp’s there is a reason for constant crying. Reflux or cmpa the most obvious. Dd1 was also a cryer when awake but at least she slept ok at night. Both settled a lot once on to solid food although dd2 puree made her worse. Blw helped

Came here to say this...
I had the same experience with my second baby. He was crying as I handed him to the cranial osteopath. The CO took hold of baby, baby gave a big sigh and stopped crying. Took only two sessions for the problem to be completely resolved.
It might be expensive but SO worth it.

For those who don't really know the theory behind cranial osteopathy - during the vaginally birth process, bones in the skull can become misaligned, and cause baby ongoing pain/discomfort. CO gently realigns them ...

Good luck OP!

One of mine was like this. Cried all day and all night. By the time he fell asleep from exhaustion, I was too wired to get to sleep myself. When I did finally get to sleep, he would wake up. I literally wanted to die.

Turns out he had reflux and cows milk protein intolerance. I relented and gave him a dummy which helped soothe him. Doctors prescribed a prescription milk and baby Gaviscon.
I also tried various things such as cranial osteopathy, baby swing, white noise - all helped.

You need to go to GP, perhaps with a family member and insist that they investigate the cause. People used to say to me “babies cry, that’s what they do” but it is not normal for a baby to be crying this much for this long.

Best of luck - it will pass!!

OP it's super tough when you have an unhappy baby 24/7.
Firstly have you ruled out all areas of discomfort? A friends baby was born with arm over their head and wouldn't ever sleep. A cranial osteopath sorted it out within a couple sessions. My first DC had CMPA and reflux, it was only finding the right milk (we had to try a few as well so not a quick result!) and using reflux medicine that helped. I was also fobbed off by several GPs, including one at out of hours that if I'd listened would of put my baby in ICU at the time.
Another baby I know had genuine colic and did just cry loads for the first 3 months, but that stage should pass by 5 months.
So if you haven't already been to the GP a trip for a good once over would be worth it.

It could be sensory, some babies can be super sensitive to clothes/perfumes/sounds.
It could just be that unfortunately you have a velcro unhappy baby, they do come out the womb with their own preferences and the only way to communicate is to cry! It's really difficult to be sleep deprived, mentally overwhelmed and have others commenting on how your baby behaves. Is your husband stepping up to support you? Can you leave baby with family to get little breaks? Are you BF or formula?
It will get better OP, we can't tell you when though which doesn't help you.
Get yourself out walking, might not stop the crying but it will help your nervous system.

Edited to say: as much as you shouldn't have to do this in 2026! Take someone else to the GP and get them to show concern as that can help them understand it's not typical baby behaviour.

Haha this is exactly the same as me. First baby absolute nightmare which plunged me into a pit of depression, but perfectly behaved toddler. Second one - absolute delight of a baby, turned into raging threenager 🤣

I have a child who whinged, cried and didn’t sleep well. It was horrific. The only way we could cope was for my husband to do the night walking around with him (and bottles) because I just couldn’t take it 24/7. He didn’t have colic etc. He just was a poor sleeper. He’s 16 and still a bad sleeper now but he’s an adorable, healthy boy. I suspect he has ADHD which makes him sort of hyper and I think he couldn’t convey that in words as a baby. Basically, he was bored! Even now, it’s half term and he’s been up since 6.30 so he could revise. Basically m it’s not necessarily that there’s anything wrong with your baby, it might just be his personality.

I’m so sorry that you are going through it. It’s awful. Our first child slept through the night at six weeks and then our second came along! We couldn’t face having any more babies after that. It will get better but it is very difficult at the time.