If you notice your friend has lost some weight…

[XGiveMeStrengthX]

Friendly reminder folks:

Your comments will be very likely to make your friend feel judged.

It’s bloody hard shifting significant amounts of weight and takes calorie restriction along with consistent exercise. This is regardless of whether they have used weight-loss drugs.

So, be a supportive friend.
You really don’t need to comment unless invited.
If they don’t ask for your opinion, then keep it to yourself.
It’s rude to talk about other people’s weight loss or gain for that matter.

Thanks 🙏

For those that are happy to mention and bring up weight loss, do you also tell people when you've noticed their weight gain???

I’m sorry you were bullied about how you looked. I think the same goes for extremely thin women too sadly.
I agree that a quiet general comment about looking well is much preferable.

No op thanks for your advice but no. When I know my friends are actively trying to.lose weight I will.congratula te them.and tell them they loo k great. If I don't know why they have lost them they would not meet the friend definition for me

so you can keep your advice

Or ask someone who looks a bit pregnant when they’re expecting, if they haven’t told you?

Agree.
Unless they've told you, in which case it's fine to comment positively along the lines of "you look well" .
Never say "you've lost weight, you look better for it" and even worse comment on it without being asked.
I dont understand why peolle think "have you lost weight?" is any different to saying "you've put on loads of weight".

You're the one being defensive if that's how you have interpreted my words.

I'm posting as the recipient of these kinds of comments, having lost a quarter of myself in 2025.

Yes absolutely everyone is running round shouting oi fatty.

that's the issue with passive aggressive question s, they are just silly

So your friends aren’t allowed to have private thoughts…. Do you ask to see their medical records too?

I lost three stone and it was very noticeable. I didn't tell anyone I was on Mounjaro. Most people commented that 'I looked really well' rather than comment outright that I had lost weight. One friend of 40 years said nothing. Not one single word. I was surprised because we are close friends.

Well quite.
You do you OP.
didn’t bother me in the slightest when people commented on my weight loss. I actually appreciated them acknowledging the effort I’d made.
Some people were a bit more roundabout the houses & would say ‘you’re looking really well etc’ Maybe it’s a more tactful way of bringing up the topic

I dont understand your post.

I dont share everything with my friends. If I was losing weight due to illness for example, I might not share that. It doesnt mean they arent my friends, it just means I'm my own person.

Maybe that friend doesn’t think your weight is the important thing about you or any of their business?

I’ve had this recently too. I’ve lost 3st in 18 months, not all intentionally and I am frequently getting
‘Ooh haven’t you lost weight?’ As if I hadn’t noticed 🙄 most then ask if it’s intentional which is a little bit late to ask as if I turn around and tell you im terribly sick they’d be embarrassed. I don’t know why people can’t mind their own business unless of course I was frequently on a diet and discussing in the office you shouldn’t really comment. I shall shall start telling those same women’Oooh isn’t your hair greying’

Real friends talk to each other about personal stuff. If that offends you, you’re acquaintances, not friends.

I've lost 3 stones over the past 8 months.

I am totally fucking sick of the fact people (often relative strangers) feel able to comment about this and ask whether or not I've cheated by using WLI.

FWIW I have friends who have found WLI gave them totally appetite suppression and easy weight loss, others who have seen lots and lots of complications (mostly pancreatitis) professionally and are very anti-, and friends who took them but still struggled to regulate their food intake enough to lose weight.

I wouldn’t comment, as I wouldn’t on any other medical or bodily issue you had. I would find it a bit embarrassing and I’d be embarrassed for you too.

My friends were very careful to say something like ‘You’re looking really well/great’ and the k would say ‘I’ve lost a bit of weight’ and that gave them the green light to talk about it. I don’t mind, I actually quite like it being noticed. I’d lost 5 stone so it would feel a bit disingenuous if none of my good friends said anything, as it was extremely obvious!

Real friendship isn’t just about honesty or curiosity; it’s about empathy. It’s pausing for half a second and thinking, “Would this put them on the spot? Would this hurt or embarrass them?” Even well-meant questions can feel invasive if they ignore how the other person might feel.

It’s about looking beyond your own urge to ask and considering someone else’s comfort first. That kind of sensitivity is what makes people feel safe around you… and it’s usually the difference between a casual friend and a real one.

Why so defensive? You sound positively angry at the thought of not having the right to talk about your friend’s body weight. I wonder what that’s about?

I’ve recently been diagnosed with Graves’ disease, I’ve lost about 2 - 3 stone, the amount of people (women) who have said to me “your on Mounjaro arent you” makes me so frustrated, feel like I have to explain my illness to people

.

I asked because this happened to me @Charlenedickens

I was doing temp work and walked into the morning meeting on my 1st shift. Someone I'd worked vaguely with 10yrs previous jumped and said 'OMG JDM, we used to work at XYZ, whow- you've put on so much weight!'

This was infront of an entire room of people I was to work with that day. I'd been fairly thin the 1st time we'd met but 10yrs on, I'd only recently lost my 3rd pregnancy and was still carry baby weight.

This is making me giggle though as DH has lost 9 stone and we went to a wedding recently where he hadn’t seen a few people since losing weight.

One of his mates saw him, and exclaimed loudly ‘Fucking hell, where’s the rest of you?’ I wonder if men have the same thought process though!

Oh god @JDM625 that’s horrendous. What is WRONG with people?!

Mmm speak for yourself op

I bloody love all the comments I’m getting on how good I look, I looked tired and boated when I was fat I was well aware of that and I openly tell people I’m using jabs

I don’t need the well done you remarks (it’s easy peasy on the jabs in my experience)

any snide judgment I annoy them by telling them yes I’m cheating just to annoy them even more 😁 I enjoy that too