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Original poster

Do you have sex in the house with your DH when kids around?

150 replies

Bigfatglasses · 30/12/2025 05:33

We did when the kids were very little but haven’t done for years. I remember walking in on my parents at it in their bedroom when I was about 6 and DH did on his parents too when he was 10 or 11. As a result, we never have done - only when kids out or we on a kid-free weekend away. I am told this is not normal? Normal to me though - but my kids are all away at uni now so we are making up for lost time!

OP posts:
Aghhhhhhhhhh · 30/12/2025 21:10

We have a lock on our bedroom door. Wait til the younger ones are asleep, teenager has headphones surgically glued to their head 24/7
No way are we abstaining from sex. As long as you are quiet and discrete and wait until theyre asleep etc its fine.

BuntyBeaufort · 30/12/2025 21:13

In the sitting room with the tv on and a chair wedged under the door handle.

ForTheForseeable · 30/12/2025 21:15

When they're asleep yes of course?

GiddyRobin · 30/12/2025 21:18

Yep, when they're asleep of a morning and when they're in bed of a night. We both WFH and lunch breaks work fine too when the kids are in school (have on occasion managed it when they're home, too), but we've never had any issue with morning and evening.

Fuelledbylatte · 30/12/2025 21:19

It’s actually pretty impossible at present. DCs aged 13,16&20 do roam around the house after their bedtime.

Nipping to chat to their sibling, get a charger, a drink, desperately needing a chat about a relationship or friendship..the evenings are rarely quiet. I’m so knackered that I am zoned out by 9.30pm so DH takes advantage of having a couple of hours gaming.

Early mornings are a no go because we have never fancied it before the first coffee, by which time kids are up and dog needs walking.

Im sure it will all be easier in a few years time.

Hartflow · 30/12/2025 21:22

No, we don't need to, we both wfh so we do it when the dcs are at school.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz · 30/12/2025 21:23

Slackbladder22 · 30/12/2025 20:15

Exposing them? We have sex in our bedroom with the door closed. Usually when they are fast asleep. No one is being ‘exposed’. As I’ve said they’ve never walked in

Show quote history

You said you walked in on your own parents… and it’s not hog deal if children see their parents have sex.

pp is right that it could be classed as abuse to expose children to sex. Obviously if it’s a pure accident, then you can’t flagellate yourself or you’ll make it worse. But making no effort to prevent is problematic.

Not trying to come across as sanctimonious here, but children shouldn’t be exposed to adults having sex.

Anon501178 · 30/12/2025 21:27

Not when they're awake...have done it a couple if times whilst they watched TV before but feels too weird.....always just sitting on tenterhooks waiting for a call of 'Mummy' or worrying they will burst in the door, need help with something etc.
Might be easier when older but then would worry even more in a way as there would be no hiding what we are doing!

Dollybantree · 30/12/2025 21:27

Yes, if we didn’t we’d never have sex.

We’ve four of the blighters!

Get a lock for your bedroom door and try not to make too much noise. The odd time one has tried to come in the bedroom whilst we’re enflagrante we shout “we’re having a nap”! That usually gets rid of them but I’m sure they’re not fooled.

It’s healthy for them to know mum and dad still shag - as long as they don’t have to see any evidence of it!

Girlof6 · 30/12/2025 21:28

We have 6 kids ranging from 3-16 and we definitely do have sex with the kids around! Just wait till the younger ones are asleep, and the older ones are in thier rooms… we are never kid free, ever, so we wouldn’t have a sex life if we didn’t. So no I don’t think it’s normal to only do it when they arnt around

Ilovelurchers · 30/12/2025 21:29

Yes, had sex with daughter's dad when we were still together, and have had sex with the two long term partner's I've had since we split, all with daughter in the house.

I explained to her about sex when she was old enough to understand it, so if she chose to walk into my bedroom without knocking (which she never did) she would have known the risk she was taking.

I don't walk into her room without knocking either, and haven't since she was about 8 or so.

Privacy is something we both take seriously and always have - it's important for successful cohabitation in my opinion, no matter what the relationship!

momamia12 · 30/12/2025 21:36

Once you dc reach 9/10 having a shop a 10 minute walk away is super handy, my dc loved being given pocket money to buy sweets or an ice cream! Don’t think they ever had any idea why. Or better still sign them up for church choir - 2 hour choir practice plus 2 hours on a Sunday morning, lots of potential thereBlush

Slowdownyouredoingfine · 30/12/2025 21:51

Yes, we have sex when our daughter is asleep in the house… otherwise she wouldn’t have 2 siblings 🤣

TheMauveBeaker · 30/12/2025 21:52

We had a lock on our door from when the DC were very young - thinking ahead 😂. It was never questioned as it had always been there.

Snippit · 30/12/2025 22:11

Like yourself our daughter no longer lives with us so really made up for lost time, it’s fabulous.

We currently have a spanner in the works, MIL had what’s called an unfit discharge from hospital with pneumonia, she had no care plan and they were going to take her home, she’s currently bedridden, staying with us since 18/12 😳.

Our bedroom backs onto her room and the bed is very creaky, so no nooky 😢. I’ve decided to set the sofa bed up in the bedroom furthest from her room and told her hubby is snoring so I’m going in there, a little fib, we need some sexy time, 😝

Fruitcakewithcheese · 30/12/2025 22:15

Yes. It's natural it's not something shameful. We obviously shut the door and don't have noisy sex if they are in the house.

PetuniaT · 30/12/2025 22:27

WhoamItoday11 · 30/12/2025 06:39

Get a good door lock.

or KY jelly on the outside handle to your bedroom door so they can't get in when they hear any noises

Notmyreality · 30/12/2025 22:32

Do you have sex in the house with your DH when kids around?

I usually ask them to leave the room first..

Weekmindedfool · 30/12/2025 22:37

We do. Kids are 11 and 13 and we do it downstairs once they’ve gone to bed. DH is wfh also so we can do it during the day when they are school also. Sometimes we even have a risky quickie during the day when they are home in their rooms glued to their screens. Our house is old and we
can hear when they move and start to come down the stairs..

falalalalaaaah · 30/12/2025 22:39

Lamentingalways · 30/12/2025 20:05

There was a thread on here yesterday (got deleted) where people were basically saying a step child (think they were 14) hearing his Dad and step mum having sex basically amounted to child abuse. I couldn’t believe it. Isn’t it a really natural thing to do? I mean I would be quiet (not difficult 😂) and lock the door but if it was overheard then it’s just a really natural conversation to have with teenagers, they might not like it but it’s a part of life isn’t it? Younger children wouldn’t have a clue about any noisy bed creaks etc and as long as they didn’t see it I can’t personally see why it would be an issue.

The dad and step mum in the post yesterday were disgusting.
Being discreet and your children hearing the odd bedspring is normal.
Going Upstairs in the middle of the day and having loud/scream the house down sex knowing full well that a CHILD can hear you is a classified as no contact sexual abuse.
I spent my childhood listening to my mum shag anything that would have her and it traumatised me. Does that make me a sensitive little snowflake or should my mum have had enough self control that she didn’t expose her child to her sex life.
Thank god that the world has moved on enough to start classifying people like her as abusive, it 100% is!

FlipFlopVibe · 30/12/2025 22:49

Lamentingalways · 30/12/2025 20:05

There was a thread on here yesterday (got deleted) where people were basically saying a step child (think they were 14) hearing his Dad and step mum having sex basically amounted to child abuse. I couldn’t believe it. Isn’t it a really natural thing to do? I mean I would be quiet (not difficult 😂) and lock the door but if it was overheard then it’s just a really natural conversation to have with teenagers, they might not like it but it’s a part of life isn’t it? Younger children wouldn’t have a clue about any noisy bed creaks etc and as long as they didn’t see it I can’t personally see why it would be an issue.

Would you have sex in front of a blind child, on account of them not being able to see it? No you wouldn’t (I hope), it’s inappropriate and there’s laws around exposing children to sexual acts

CandiedPrincess · 30/12/2025 22:53

Yep, when they're in bed asleep. Can't imagine any reason not to.

MsSmartShoes · 30/12/2025 22:56

Just put a lock on the door.

TeenLifeMum · 30/12/2025 22:59

Yes, 3 teens in the house and we can easily slip off, lock the door and they don’t notice. I make sure they’ve got food and are occupied.

Diamondsbutnoknickers · 30/12/2025 23:06

We have always had a "if the door is closed, knock" policy and try to be quiet and when the children are sleeping/busy. Never outside our room if they are home.

I've posted about it before. My parents used to have loud sex and/or sex everywhere in the house (including on my bed). They'd also insist on having sex in the shower which was on a very thin wall next to my bedroom and once in a tent we were all sharing. I lost count of the amount of times I heard/walked in on them.

It is absolutely disgusting and they should be ashamed of it.

The irony is that we werent allowed in their room and would never have dared gone in uninvited so it's not like they didnt have privacy.

It really messed me up sex wise and I have a lot of hang ups and anxiety about it even now. I'm really angry with them.