Say here what you can’t say in real life - Christmas edition

[Rainallnight]

If you have someone in your life who is driving you mad or making you brim with rage this Christmas, tell them here!

Get it off your chest in a safe space so you can turn around, smile, and offer them a sherry.

NB - this isn’t AIBU. All gripes are correct and permitted.

I will start.

SIL, I am furious that we have driven hundreds of miles with small DC to spend Christmas in your part of the country, including hosting YOUR mother for the duration, only to find that you are not spending Christmas Day with us, AND that you have not yet deigned to pin down a day to even visit. Furious, I tell you.

Narcissistic, abusive mother in another country,
I would like you to die already, so you don't request a phone call from me every day, also for me to take my inheritance, leave my husband and finally become a recluse, before it's me who isn't going to live long enough to do what I want to do.
You had 17 years of wallowing around, being left alone in a massive family apartment.
It's my turn now.

How the Mumsnet thumbs up means agree only. Sometimes I just want to like someones post. Same goes for the clap hands emoji, sometimes I want to applaud an opinion instead of saying thanks. Sorry Mumsnet. You're all seriously awesome though!!

I really, really, absolutely do not want to go visiting the extended family on Christmas Day. Completely understand that “that’s what you do” but I’m a month post hysterectomy, don’t have the kids this year and would genuinely prefer to spend the day either by myself or with the immediate lot. The idea of having to go over and then be at the mercy of the designated driver for coming home while 20 odd people are squished into a little 3 bed is the last thing I want to fucking do. Just because I’m single doesn’t mean you need to make me revert back to being a child and have you tell me what I will be doing 🙃

Stop blackmailing me into coming down for Christmas. I can't. I have a depressed DP who is on new meds and he won't come and I can't leave him on his own. We have a young baby and an older DD that doesn't want to go. Just understand that things aren't as simple for me! I also don't want to hear about how my cunt mother is doing all fucking Christmas, I DO NOT CARE.

No, it does not make it difficult to manage money just because we have been paid 10-days early and no, it does not make January "a long month", it is exactly the same length as six other months in the year.
Just budget properly and don't think that just because your salary hit your account early you have to spend it straight away.
It should not be a surprise, the company has been doing it this way for all of the decades you have worked here.*

• Retired now but my god, the same tossers said the same thing year after year.......... after year.😖

Just to add.
If you really CAN'T manage being paid a few days early when you are fully aware that you can't reel in your spending year after year, do you really think you are the correct person to manage projects costing up to half a £mill?????

Why on earth are you putting your partner & kids through that? What the hell for?

To the people shopping in the artisanal cheese shop: I agree it is a delightful shop and worthy of leisurely attention and sampling. But not this week. This week is the time to have already made up your mind about which cheeses and how much you need, to go in there with your card at the ready, give your order, pay and leave. Why are so many of you behaving like this is your first encounter with cheese, and there isn’t a long queue outside in the December gloom?

I will not organise my time off over Christmas around your brother and his feckless lot. His dithering and inability to stick to a plan is not just tiresome, it’s bloody rude. I will crack on and do the things I want to do with my own children and go from there.

Gosh, why do you even do it to yourself? He honestly doesn’t sound worth it.

You and others like you are in no obligation to have relationships with these wastes of space you know?

I would feel honoured if anyone felt they could share that with me, I’m sure many others would feel the same ❤️

Don’t let the nasty vocal minority make you feel you have to hide that part of who you are.

MIL it’s time to give up now. Give up on trying to ruin my marriage. Give up on trying to make your son into your husband. Give up on telling yourself you’re a good person. You’re not a good person, you never have been and you never will be. You have ruined the lives of your children and you are now ruining the lines of your children in law. You sicken me.

Son, I can’t put myself in your shoes but losing your dad this year must be destroying you. You’re so young to be going through this and it’s been a horrible year. We weren’t together anymore but I miss him terribly too and I’m finding it harder and harder each day to keep things together, I’m really struggling. I’m sorry we haven’t put the tree up, or done Christmassy things like we normally would, and that everything is so last minute but I just don’t know how to deal with this and I’ve never felt anything like it before. I want to be a good mum but I don’t know how to be your only parent forever

In laws, I don’t want to see you at Christmas, or ever again really, you are the most selfish couple of fuckwits and if I had my time again I don’t know that I’d have married your son due to the strain you have all put on our marriage.

I really don't want to read your boastful round robin letter that you write every year particularly as I will be spending Boxing Day with you and you will tell me all the details of your life but not ask me how I'm doing . . . .

DH could you please cheer up, stop pretending you are ill (again) and make an effort to make Christmas pleasant for the rest of us.

I'm a few weeks in to somehow starting up a kind of lovers situation with someone I've admired for years because he's semi famous/well known. We talk everyday, met to have mind-blowing sex and I'm sure I'm falling in love with him.

Merry Christmas one and all!

Is it Jeremy Kyle?

SIL & BIL I can’t face listening to your extreme health anxieties all through the Christmas festivities whilst you stuff yourselves with every unhealthy piece of food available, drink yourself stupid whilst puffing on a fag as you do most other days of the year.

MIL, you really are the most vindictive person I’ve ever had the misfortune to meet. I am pleased that I won’t see you over Christmas and new year. When you’re old and alone, I hope you take a long hard look at how you’ve treated people who could have cared about you.

To the family that visited Santa today and moaned that you had to wait and are going to put a complaint in as we were running 5 minutes late -we all do our best but you weren't the last - that was the family with the severely disabled little boy and his siblings who were an absolute credit to their parents and an absolute joy to meet and made up for your nasty behaviour. I hope they have a magical Christmas x

Mum I love you and it’s kind you “worry about me”, but stressing how me being tired and having no time to myself and always being busy at work and at home doing it all and how I need to have some time out and offering to babysit “whenever, as long as I’m free I’m happy to” doesn’t count when you double book so I have to cancel my plans. Nor does it count when you say “we’re happy with beans on toast on Christmas Day so you can chill out and play with the kids, we’re just looking forward to seeing you” and “take time off at work and don’t agree to see everyone, just chill out” then say we can’t have curry, and you’ll only eat turkey or chicken, and we can’t do gammon and chips as you’re expecting us to come to you for that two days later. Next year I have to learn from these past christmases (and the rest of the year!) and stick to my boundaries.

@FamingolosForDays
100% feel the hurt of first time not seeing the Xmas morning wake up joy.

Ex-DH, I hope you make an effort for them and don’t leave it to your poor Mum who is doing everything for everyone, including cleaning your room now you have moved back there. The heart attacks and multiple stents should have been a clue that she needs rest and not waking up super early to make the kids pack lunches the one day a fortnight you take them to school.

Ex-MIL, I wish I could invite you to my Christmas celebrations without it being an invitation for the rest of the alcohol stealing, super fussy, 4x helping eating lot that will complain if I haven’t made a specific thing after cooking multiple rounds of food (and paying for it) for 25 people. Bring your own FUCKING DRINK like I asked you to do as the ONLY contribution to the day.

if there was any way to kidnap her for the day I would at this point and she might get to sit down for more than 10 minutes.

I’m finding your greeting of “don’t lose any more weight” upsetting. No hello, no lovely to see you first. 2 years ago I overhauled my diet and lifestyle and I lost 5st. I have maintained my weightloss successfully for over a year and now have a healthy BMI.
JUST STOP COMMENTING!!

Can't wait to give my kids their gifts from you in our own house when you absolutely could have made the effort to come over and see them open them rather than handing them over to us weeks ago. Like you do every year in advance of every birthday and Christmas instead of seeing them on the actual day itself or very close to it. Do not understand why, when you actually don't really have any other plans, you don't want to see your grandchildren opening their gifts?? Exchange them like a normal bloody family. I'm sick of buying gifts and people (because his sister does it too and without a thank you either) taking them to their own houses to open separately. It's fucking weird. Also, maybe try buying gifts which my kids would like rather than ones based on what your other grandchildren are interested in. You would probably know what they liked if you made more effort to be part of their lives.