Things I haven’t said out loud this week

[YorkieTheRabbit]

I politely told you last week that I didn’t want to involved, I haven’t changed my mind.
You’ve sidelined your dad for over a decade , in favour of your mum.
Are you really surprised that he’s moved on with his life rather than being hung on the back of the door for you?
You can’t expect him to change his Christmas plans because yours have gone wrong. You’re an adult, act like one, the world doesn’t revolve around you.

Fucking nasty hoity toity bitch lecturing a kid who has enough to deal with on the basis that they have to live with you.

Go on fuck up your child’s education some more why don’t you by choosing a path so horribly clearly unsuitable.

Knobhead.

Mum, I really don't need you to tell me that my teenage son is being an annoying teenager because I split up with his dad on friendly terms years ago whereas you dragged us through decades of parental fights and neglect. I gave you a chance to apologize which you didn't want to take, so now just fuck off.

Me too (and my dad) as confirmed by my psychiatrist

To my boss: No, I don’t appreciate that you sent me a Christmas gift to say thank you. Having that drop through my door was unwelcome and brought back bad memories. I know you meant well but that’s not why you have access to my address on the HR system FGS!

Also, stop copying me, it’s making you look silly and people are laughing at you behind your back.

Your girlfriend is a brassy, self-centred, know-it-all and she gets on my nerves. You are far too nice and give in to her to keep the peace too often. I wish you weren’t moving in with her but at least you have the sense to keep your finances separate.

Oh god. I didn’t mean for this to be taken out of context
thanks to all the posters for their kind wishes
I was scared for my dc that they would be disappointed by uni applications

To one of my dearest friends:
Your “witty, eccentric harmless” husband of nearly 30 years is a sexual predator. Do you know? How can you not know - particularly when he has suddenly changed jobs at least twice.

Following repeatedly pawing me a year ago under the table & in lines at a formal function, where I politely took his hands off me to avoid a scene, the situation is escalating.

He repeatedly touches my body any chance he gets, he tries to actually kiss me on the lips when we greet.
My DH knows this and obviously hates it - I tell him everything.
We do not know what to do. He is superficially charming but we are realising that he is a schemer, a letch, and frankly disgusting.
Our families are so tightly linked along with 2 others - 17 people in all. His wife’s world will be blown apart if this comes out & he knows this.

Dear friend, what should I do? We dread seeing him and yet we love you.

Your family is a fucking mess. You haven’t all seen each other since last Christmas and now I have to see you all on 3 separate occasions, over my Christmas break because you can’t get it together to organise one afternoon. You are all so self-centred, you will not co-operate or negotiate and you all want it your own way so no family get together, all 3 siblings separately because if i don’t let you see my children I am the bad guy.

Another one from me :

I really don’t want you to be there when I give relation and DC gifts but it looks like I haven’t got a choice. There’s an extra gift I don’t want calling attention to in any case but fundamentally you’ll have a face on because how dare I give thoughtful gifts that are superior to yours? The audacity of me!

Grow the fuck up! You are an adult and a parent, stop arguing with a sen kid for fucks sake, it’s pathetic.
And stop comparing your life to your friends, accept how things are and try to make the best of it.

That is so lovely and I feel similar about mine - if you can't say it out loud, write it in a card when you/she is leaving. I know my MiL would treasure that (and pass it round all her friends).

I’m not stupid, I know the reason you haven’t invited us is because you don’t want to be around my disabled son.

I really don’t like you. You are perfectly old enough to know that it isn’t ok to be rude and abrupt. Just button it, or do you think that you are without any faults? I realise that we had difficult childhoods and that we are in many ways similar. I suspect that some of your attitudes and behaviours stem from anxiety, but do you have no self reflection? No awareness?

I feel tense whenever I have to communicate with you. It baffles me that you think it’s helpful to be aggressively critical of me. I have never, ever criticised you.

After our parents die, I want nothing to do with you.

Not next year @OneTipsyDreamer there’s no need for all that palaver again.

You're fucking weird. You care more about the family image than anything and are letting kids socialise with a child sex offender.

Why do you keep sending us gifts but won't reply to messages? Why do you still keep watching our social media?

Why are you so surprised that we are cross with you? You were so far out of order and have zero ability for self-reflection.

I know you're jealous of me. Maybe if you weren't such a self centred lazy slob gobshite you could have a nice life.

No we haven’t made arrangements for you to visit. Do you ever think to ask yourselves why?

It may be a ‘dead name’ to you but it’s the only name I’ve ever called you. You may want to erase your identity but you don’t realise that our past is the only link we have. It’s hurtful for me to pretend that you’re a whole new person and all my memories are null and void.

Saying you wanted to be supportive was empty performative words that made you feel good about yourself. Moaning about your daughter wasn’t supportive. Moaning about money wasn’t supportive. Asking me to stand there while you buy pyjamas wasn’t supportive. You could have sent a thoughtful gift. You could have asked me what I wanted. You could have listened.

I don't know why you insist on the same rituals every year when it makes all of us so miserable. You are clearly very unwell, and are in denial about your health, even when the medical evidence has been so clearly laid out. Everything you do is so selfish and self centered, can't you think of someone else, even very briefly? Your behaviour has resulted in me hating Christmas for years, I loath every minute of it

If you haven't made any resolutions there are a few I can suggest on your behalf as there are a lot of ways you can improve.

I told you I won’t drink shots and yet you bought me a shot and got cross I wouldn’t drink it. FUCK OFF

Our dad has been with his wife for fifteen years. I know she's not our mum but she's a nice woman and she loves him. Your refusal to have Nothing To Do With It to the point you couldn't even manage a polite "hope she gets better soon" after a serious operation makes you look like an arse. It was sort of excusable in your early twenties (although she has a son who's even younger than you who's been a hundred times more mature) but now you're in your mid thirties it comes across as pathetic.

I think you miss talking to me, but you’ve fenced yourself in with offended ness. You have turned into your mother.

Do I have to do EVERYTHING?????????????????