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What are you up to today if you have chronic illness? Thread 4

1000 replies

MewithME · 11/12/2025 16:43

Link to last thread 🧵 https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/_chat/5438353-what-are-you-up-to-today-if-you-have-chronic-illness-thread-3

This is the bumper Christmas issue with the added challenge of all the work Xmas brings and feelings it might bring up...but we're here. Highs and lows. 🌲🌲😴🤕🤗

What are you up to today if you have chronic illness? Thread 3 | Mumsnet

Link to last thread. [[https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/_chat/5406424-what-are-you-up-to-today-if-you-have-chronic-illness-part-2 https://www.mumsnet.c...

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/_chat/5438353-what-are-you-up-to-today-if-you-have-chronic-illness-thread-3

OP posts:
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18
MewithME · 22/12/2025 11:04

Aw, that sounds awful, @Orangesandlemons77 .
Are you peri too? That can trigger anxiety and happen at night. Christmas is a lot when you have extended family to look after. Mine is the easiest possible with just me and DS and it's still a lot!

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Orangesandlemons77 · 22/12/2025 11:36

MewithME · 22/12/2025 11:04

Aw, that sounds awful, @Orangesandlemons77 .
Are you peri too? That can trigger anxiety and happen at night. Christmas is a lot when you have extended family to look after. Mine is the easiest possible with just me and DS and it's still a lot!

Yes, peri here too; I'm on HRT though. Not sure it makes much difference. I'll be glad when this week is over. MIL sleeping in the lounge over Christmas is stressing me out too. Having a spare room would be better. Anyway it is what it is, it will not be forever thankfully.

Forgot some relatives presents we saw at the weekend, so scrabbling to send their kids something via Amazon. I seem to not cope with simple things these days. Oh well.

Things would be a lot easier if family did not all send presents, also to adults, e.g. from cousins, DH's siblings etc, it all is quite overwhelming. I'm leaving him to deal with most of it, it is his side of the family after all. On mine they are lucky if they get a card!

MewithME · 22/12/2025 11:54

@Orangesandlemons77 i have told a few people not to bother this year. Not to be a Grinch but we women (usually) are running round like headless chickens making Jeff Bezos richer and loads of these gifts are not wanted or needed.

Look after yourself. Flowers

OP posts:
katystar · 22/12/2025 12:29

I’m finally home, lots of fluids and 4 bags of blood. Managed to fall down the stairs this morning so feeling battered and bruised! I’m working and trying to get Xmas sorted but just want to go to bed.

Tryonemoretime · 22/12/2025 13:19

So sorry, @katystar. Hope you feel better soon 😪

MewithME · 22/12/2025 13:30

Oh @katystar that's no good! Hope you have someone to look after you ❤️

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FurForksSake · 22/12/2025 14:07

Oh @katystar please be careful with yourself, if you need to be off sick please do it. I hope you are feeling ok.

ForLoveNotMoney · 22/12/2025 14:23

Oh @katystarI hope you feel better from the blood and fluids and aren’t too battered from the fall ❤️

I had an epic morning! Did a bug food shop, went out for breakfast, mooched round a couple of shops, unloaded the shopping, done two loads of washing and sorted the outside lights which had fallen down on one side.
Had a call from the hospital to offer me the 30th December for my infliximab which I was not happy about as it’s due no later than 25th and would mean I’d have to increase my prednisolone back up to 40mg for another week. Anyway, managed to wangle a Christmas Eve appointment so can drop my pred to 30mg as planned Wednesday and get my infusion. So all in all today has been a really good day!

Sat down for the rest of the day now!

Stonewallslemon · 22/12/2025 16:33

Hello everyone
im trying again to join this thread after somehow failing a while ago, anyway, good wishes to all of you.

i have severe RA and am currently not well; booked for hospital treatment after Christmas. I can relate to so much of what so many of you experience and say!
what has prompted me to write today is an experience I had this morning.

i went, fairly early, to a fruit and veg wholesaler to buy fresh stuff. It was, as I had expected, much busier than normal. What I hadn’t expected was to be cannoned into from behind and knocked to my knees by a child of around I’d say six. His mum apologised and pulled him away. Somewhat shocked I muttered to myself or so I thought ‘ I should think so’ . I’m quite sure neither mum nor child heard me.
A man, unconnected to mum and child but next to me however did hear absolutely laid into me verbally for being unkind to a child until I said with as much dignity as I could muster that I have RA and the collision had really hurt. He then couldn’t apologise enough.
i just left, came home and have cried since.

i know I have a largely hidden disability but something about today has clearly hit a lot of unarticulated or even unknown nerve endings. I feel obscurely both guilty and very much invisible. I suppose I wonder if any of this resonates with others.

Anyway thanks for reading and also for this very valuable thread.

FurForksSake · 22/12/2025 16:36

I’m so sorry that happened @Stonewallslemon and I’d have had a similar reaction. It’s so hard when people just aren’t careful. I often have my stick or crutches as people then give me a little more space. I do hope you can do something nice for yourself. You were not in the wrong at all.

ForLoveNotMoney · 22/12/2025 16:39

I feel completely invisible too @Stonewallslemonx

Stonewallslemon · 22/12/2025 16:42

Ah thanks FurforksSake - love that name!

Thank you too ForLoveNotMoney - it stinks doesn’t it.

MewithME · 22/12/2025 17:13

@Stonewallslemon what on earth is wrong with people? Did nobody help you up? That man should be utterly ashamed of himself. I'm sorry.

I fell the other week. A chair went out from under me and I ended up on my bum. So embarrassing. I wasn't even hurt . It just hurt to get up and it was the icing on the cake after a difficult day. I cried too out of frustration and embarrassment and shock.

Be kind to yourself. Flowers

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Stonewallslemon · 22/12/2025 17:24

@MewithME I’m so sorry to hear this. It’s the shock and embarrassment I think, I at least felt this way. Also I think another and very public reminder of physical and as it turns out , emotional vulnerability..

Thankyou for your kindness and good wishes to all.

Tryonemoretime · 22/12/2025 17:46

Today I discovered I'm old. Was kneeling by the flowerbed trying to do some weeding. Stood up to say "Hi" to my lovely son in law, tottered backwards, and if it hadn't been for the wall, I'd have fallen over backwards. I've not done much weeding this year because of blasted Long Covid, the borders are a mess and gardeners are like gold dust where we live!

Songlines · 22/12/2025 18:18

I realise that I've fallen so many times over the years that I no longer feel any kind of shame or embarrassment. I just lie there for a minute or so and think 'FFS, not again ' before trying to get to my feet, which is never dignified! I face planted a radiator two weeks ago and sported a lovely black eye and dressing on my cheek for a few days.
I hate that my body lets me down like that and that I live in constant fear of falling. At the same time, I try to keep moving as that's the only way to keep the muscles around my joints in any sort of condition. It's all such a literal and metaphorical balancing act.
However, yesterday I marked the Solstice out in the open with friends and today I've collected the turkey, visited a friend in hospital, iced the cake, put the giblets in the slow cooker to make stock for the gravy, made a shepherd's pie for Christmas Eve and written three Christmas cards. I'm done in and slumped on the sofa with a glass of wine.
But I did it, I borrowed some of tomorrow's spoons and did it.

FurForksSake · 22/12/2025 18:28

I did some gentle crafting today, and completed it! I had to take a few breaks but it’s done and that is amazing for me.

What are you up to today if you have chronic illness? Thread 4
FuzzyPuffling · 22/12/2025 19:13

I have nothing erudite or witty to say, but am standing in solidarity with all those who have fallen or been knocked over. I feel i would have given the 6 year old in the supermarket a proper " headteacher-style" lecture. Probably because I'm feeling like that today.

We are not invisible.

ForLoveNotMoney · 23/12/2025 10:27

Well I did so much yesterday! Paid for it a bit today as couldn’t wake up and feel very tired and pained. Aiming for a quiet day today with some baking and going to see our pony who has been kindly looked after by my friend for the last month! I owe her a lot

Swanhilde · 23/12/2025 10:32

Sainsbury's was busy but could have been worse. Took my flip stick so sat down a lot! But we weren't home til 9pm, so another late night for me 😴

Consequently I slept deeply and didn't wake up til 9am. The food delivery is coming soon so have tidied the kitchen to make way for that. And then that's everything except for the turkey which we'll collect tomorrow morning 🦃

I'm currently in bed with a cuppa, where I will spend the rest of the day with my knitting. Just one glove to go for my mum 🧶

Take care everyone 💕

Orangesandlemons77 · 23/12/2025 10:42

I randomly managed to get an online delivery slot for tomorrow so buying lots of stuff and hoping it arrives ok. Food etc. It's more expensive ready made but I can't face doing it from scratch.

No turkeys available online though, DH will have to get one elsewhere.

Strangely uplifted by the idea of it being the solstice last week and turning a corner with the dark days. Still got jan and Feb to go but soon Spring will be here.

Orangesandlemons77 · 23/12/2025 10:43

I'm currently in bed with a cuppa, where I will spend the rest of the day with my knitting

It always makes me feel better to read stuff like that! Have a good day

FuzzyPuffling · 23/12/2025 10:49

I've finished wrapping presents, made our dinner ( as I never feel like doing it later) had a shower and hair wash and am contemplating doing a Christmas card for my neighbour who never speaks to me. Yes/no?

TodayIsatrickyone · 23/12/2025 11:46

Do it @FuzzyPuffling Kill them with kindness so they have to say hello! I have a neighbour like that and I always say a big cheery hello and then smile to myself as she looks at the ground and mutters hello back begrudgingly 😂

Argh my DD isn’t well with what looks like flu! What crap timing!

FuzzyPuffling · 23/12/2025 12:11

I've done it...card through NDN'S door. In the words of Raymond Briggs, "Happy Blooming Christmas"! 😁

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