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Original poster

How to survive this meal ?

119 replies

crisikrinkles · 03/12/2025 09:57

Today is my partners dads birthday.
We are going out for a meal at 2pm
i have just been to the dentist and I have a tooth abscess.
i haven’t slept in 3 days really
The pain is horrendous
I have been given antibiotics and then I need a root canal once this has gone.

My partner only sees his dad once a year and I missed the last meet up due to work so my partner says I have to be there.

i can’t eat,I barely can open my mouth.
My partner says “just try”
I have been struggling with mash
As soon as I open my mouth

I’ve said il go and won’t eat,il have a soft drink.
My partner says that looks ridiculous but what can I do?
im in agony

OP posts:
Fupoffyagrasshole · 04/12/2025 10:03

op what are you doing!! tell your partner to fuck off and leave you alone to recover!

he can go to his dads overnight and you need to rest!

Moggies3 · 04/12/2025 10:10

Are you frightened of your Partner OP?

BrentfordForever · 04/12/2025 11:11

bigboykitty · 04/12/2025 08:29

I don't think it matters what anyone says to you. Everyone is telling you to respect the fact that you're ill and not to fall in with the expectations of your bullying partner, but you seem determined to do just that.

This 10000000%

OP are you actually asking for more advice? 😂

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General health
Zempy · 04/12/2025 12:31

You are allowing yourself to be bullied. Or do you quite enjoy being a martyr?

Original poster
crisikrinkles · 04/12/2025 12:36

Oh I’m sorry everyone I know sometimes I’m a bit of a wet wipe.
I know what I want to do,I’ve just been conditioned to think I’m always in the wrong …so when I hear others opinions I feel less guilty (if that makes sense )
Ive said I’m not staying overnight.

OP posts:
diddl · 04/12/2025 13:54

bigboykitty · 04/12/2025 08:29

I don't think it matters what anyone says to you. Everyone is telling you to respect the fact that you're ill and not to fall in with the expectations of your bullying partner, but you seem determined to do just that.

Unfortunately it does seem to be that way doesn't it?

You didn't have to go yesterday, you don't have to go tomorrow or Sunday.

Even if you weren't ill!

Your partner & his dad both sound bullying in their own way.

Why do you have to laugh when it isn't funny?

Original poster
crisikrinkles · 04/12/2025 21:35

I’m not going at the weekend.
I told him and he’s spent all night being horrible.
s
Doesn’t want to be in the same room as me.
Says I know he doesn’t see his dad much and that how would I feel if I could only see my dad once a week.
I asked him to just come to bed and he went on one saying “no I’m not,I don’t want to be in the same room as you,I have to lie to my dad and say you have plans as toothache wouldn’t stop anyone “

OP posts:
echt · 04/12/2025 21:48

What a twat. I'm sending vibes to bring on a dental abscess for your partner.

Fdsew · 04/12/2025 22:16

You are clearly in a highly abusive relationship with a very nasty man.

It doesn't sound like you have children.
Please don't.
He will get a lot worse, and any children will have an awful childhood.

He doesn't care about you.
He's just an abusive controlling prick.

Get away asap.

EddyNeddy · 04/12/2025 22:25

crisikrinkles · 04/12/2025 21:35

I’m not going at the weekend.
I told him and he’s spent all night being horrible.
s
Doesn’t want to be in the same room as me.
Says I know he doesn’t see his dad much and that how would I feel if I could only see my dad once a week.
I asked him to just come to bed and he went on one saying “no I’m not,I don’t want to be in the same room as you,I have to lie to my dad and say you have plans as toothache wouldn’t stop anyone “

Why are you so deferential? It’s 2025. This man is not your master.

blankcanvas3 · 04/12/2025 22:45

God he sounds awful. You need to stand up for yourself, you didn’t need to go out for lunch, you don’t need to laugh at all of his jokes and you certainly don’t need to go away this weekend if you don’t want to.

Your partner is bullying you. You should really reconsider this relationship

KnickerlessParsons · 04/12/2025 22:51

For the pain, try Difflam mouth wash. It really helped DH when he had an ulcer.

Original poster
crisikrinkles · 04/12/2025 22:59

Thanks il try that.
Hopefuly Santa will bring him a tooth abscess
He is not always insensitive but his bedside manner leaves a lot to be desired
Thanks everyone
it’s a little early but hope everyone has a lovely Christmas

OP posts:
Moggies3 · 04/12/2025 23:17

fgs your updates are ridiculous
I was feeling sorry for you but you seem determined to accept his coercive and abusive behaviour, his father trained him well.....
Hopefully Santa will give you a kick up the arse to go into 2026 single after kicking both of them to the kerb

Hayley1256 · 04/12/2025 23:21

Nuromol is the best pain relief for toothache. Feel better soon OP

LittleBitofBread · 05/12/2025 08:21

crisikrinkles · 04/12/2025 21:35

I’m not going at the weekend.
I told him and he’s spent all night being horrible.
s
Doesn’t want to be in the same room as me.
Says I know he doesn’t see his dad much and that how would I feel if I could only see my dad once a week.
I asked him to just come to bed and he went on one saying “no I’m not,I don’t want to be in the same room as you,I have to lie to my dad and say you have plans as toothache wouldn’t stop anyone “

He's an abuser and he's also dim. how would I feel if I could only see my dad once a week doesn't make sense; it's HIS dad not yours Confused

Fupoffyagrasshole · 05/12/2025 08:45

No idea why you need to be there to facilitate him meeting up with his dad? Is he unable to do anything alone.

you need to dump this guy - he’s controlling as
fuck

IAmKerplunk · 05/12/2025 12:39

It’s 2025 and his dad only lives in Spain - why do they only see each other once a year?

Besides that - your p and his dad both sound uncaring twats so I would be considering how much I want to be in their lives.

LittleBitofBread · 05/12/2025 13:04

IAmKerplunk · 05/12/2025 12:39

It’s 2025 and his dad only lives in Spain - why do they only see each other once a year?

Besides that - your p and his dad both sound uncaring twats so I would be considering how much I want to be in their lives.

It’s 2025 and his dad only lives in Spain - why do they only see each other once a year?
Maybe it's a good excuse for his son not to see him more often? He sounds a nightmare (an d yes I know it seems to have rubbed off on the son as well).

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