How socially-acceptable was smacking children in the 70s/80s/90s?

[WickedLabubus]

I was born mid eighties. As a child, my siblings and I were smacked quite a bit (as in once-twice a week) by our dad. It was always on the bum and only if we had done something naughty. However, it was painful and usually left a mark. This happened for most of my childhood and didn’t stop until moved away for university in the 00s.

If its relevant, I grew up in a working class northern town. I’d say that 50% of my friends in primary and secondary school were also smacked at home.

These days, I work adjacent to safeguarding, where smacking and the like are taken very seriously. Thankfully, it doesn’t seem as common these days.

it has got me thinking though, was my childhood abnormal or has smacking just become drastically unacceptable in a very short space of time?

I'm glad you said you'd never do it yourself. The harm it does is the normalising of hitting, the idea that if a parent loses control of their child they might hit and (frequently) that this is somehow the child's fault.

Agree. What's the point of teaching a child that no one's allowed to touch their butt without their consent, and then proceed to do so and cause pain?

It was always my Mum that hit us. If one of us had done something wrong, she would slap any of us nearby. My Dad never hit

Think a lot of people confuse 'smacking' with beating. They're not the same by a long way.

I was smacked now and again. I know this sounds cliche but really, I'm fine and I know my parents loved me. They genuinely were a product of their own slightly shitty upbringing, I don't hold it against them whatsoever. I did have to adjust my own thinking as a parent though.

In 2013, I witnessed an upper-middle class friend of my cousin smack her 3yo daughter, having taken them out of a Christening. I'd taken my own baby out as he was crying and I did find that shocking. I admit I didn't challenge it, which I'm ashamed of.

It's hard though, isn't it? I saw a dad smack his misbehaving pre-schooler in a supermarket. I decided that as it was (sort of) legal in England, there was probably no point in reporting it.

I think I'm OK about my own parents smacking me. The trouble is, their example left me with few alternatives for tackling persistent bad behaviour from my own DC.

To be clear, I don't agree with smacking, but I struggle with my own DC's behaviour at times and wish I had a good example to follow.