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Original poster

Speeding teen driver - DS a passenger WWYD

270 replies

DeadMansBones · 11/10/2025 13:10

My DS was out with friends last night, DS is 17 driver of the car is 18. I get a notification via life360 app that the car is driving at 102 mph and 67 risky incidents. The route driven was down back roads that are unlit and dangerous. WWYD?

OP posts:
Beamur · 11/10/2025 13:15

I'd be sitting him down and showing him that information and ask him to explain what was going on. Calmly.
Does he know you track his phone? Not judging - just asking.

slet · 11/10/2025 13:16

I would not allow him to get a lift from friends again. Teenage boys are notorious for dangerous driving and the rate of a fatal crash increases when they have peers in the car. It’s so bad there are even proposals to change the law when it comes to passengers. No way would he be allowed in that car with that driver again.

Original poster
DeadMansBones · 11/10/2025 13:17

Yes they have to enter a code on their phone for the app to work so they are aware. It's more just to check location if needed but these driving details came through as a notification on my phone. The driving part is all a bit new to me as they are all only just starting to pass their tests.

OP posts:
ClaredeBear · 11/10/2025 13:19

I’ve got to agree with PP on this as it’s not a situation whereby he can correct mistakes. He’s in danger and more to the point (and I appreciate he’s not the driver) by participating he’s encouraging this and endangering the lives of others.

Luxio · 11/10/2025 13:20

Honestly I would be discussing it with the child's parents and potentially reporting it to the police. It's not just his own life and his passengers he put at risk but all those using the roads. If this teenager has just recently passed he needs a huge reality check before he kills someone.

Beamur · 11/10/2025 13:20

I agree with the other poster that this is the kind of behaviour that ends up with people being killed, so I think you are right to be very alarmed.
But it would be more effective for him to realise that - I would want to hear his version of events first. But I would not want him in the car with that friend again - but you might find that hard to enforce.

Original poster
DeadMansBones · 11/10/2025 13:20

I have spoken to him and he just said he didn't notice how fast they were going but at that speed you must notice.

OP posts:
RedRosesParmaViolets · 11/10/2025 13:20

As others have said look into stats for teen deaths
. Point blank absolute not .

RedRosesParmaViolets · 11/10/2025 13:22

Op what do you expect him to say?
Just show him the stats id also be contacting the other parents to make sure they are awre

FutureMarchionessOfVidal · 11/10/2025 13:26

This young driver is a danger to himself & his passengers & other road users. (I am using ‘his’ by default- of course it may be a female.)

I would definitely tell his parents (assuming he lives with them). Have to say I would also consider calling the police and discussing with them. I really don’t think this person should be driving at all.

If your son isn’t willing to look at reality it is a bit difficult to know what to say to him. But I would look up recent fatal crashes involving young drivers & show him the coverage. I would also collect him myself in future and not allow him to get a lift with someone who poses a real risk to his life.

What a complete tit of a driver.

Thatmoves · 11/10/2025 13:28

He should not have even been in the car, given his friend was a new driver and your son is 17

Thatmoves · 11/10/2025 13:29

I would be contacting the friend’s parents, who will almost be certainly be paying for his insurance

Zippedydodah · 11/10/2025 13:30

Thatmoves · 11/10/2025 13:28

He should not have even been in the car, given his friend was a new driver and your son is 17

Precisely.
If your DS was ‘unaware of the speed’ as he says, then your DS’s ability to judge the safety of being driven by an idiot is sadly absent.

HotTiredDog · 11/10/2025 13:30

Definitely tell the driver’s parents, please.
Reminds me of a recent event where a recently-passed driver / child removed the insurance co’s black box from their car. They then drove at excess speed on local roads & had an accident where one of their passengers was injured & another car was badly damaged (as well as their own).
Needless to say, the child has had their licence revoked & criminal charges are believed to be imminent. They are of course unlikely to be able to afford insurance in future. Plus there is a humongous bill on its way to the child (more accurately their parents).

TwoTuesday · 11/10/2025 13:32

My son had a friend like this. He lost his licence for undertaking an unmarked police car at speed and being over the alcohol limit. He got banned for 2 years and will have to retake his driving test.
So hopefully your son's friend will get caught before he hurts someone. I would let the other person's parents know and not allow your son in his car in the meantime. It is such a scary time when they first start driving.

Bobiverse · 11/10/2025 13:33

He 100% knew how fast they were going, not the exact figure by he absolutely knew they were flying down that road.

I’m a mum of 2 boys. I’m considered one of the more relaxed parents amongst their friends but I have a very strict role here; they are not getting in a car with other teenaged boys. It’s just not happening.

The statistics for accident with teenage boy drivers are so awful, there are discussion on removing their right to drive with a passenger and making laws around it. If your teenage boy is going to die, the odds are that he will die in a car accident with other teenaged boys.

That could all be hypothetical… but now you know that, for him, it isn’t. Because you’ve seen how his mate is driving, and how he went along with it and is pretending he didn’t know.

Time to be a parent. And tell the other boy’s parents too.

doreuol · 11/10/2025 13:37

My teenagers were banned from going in cars with other friends driving . It just didn’t happen.

Original poster
DeadMansBones · 11/10/2025 13:37

I don't know the other boys parents at all or I would be very tempted to tell them. It's so bloody scary to think what could happen

OP posts:
MILLYmo0se · 11/10/2025 13:39

So he claims not to have realised the driver was far exceeding the speed limits and risk assessment for the roads they were on........ Obviously he was aware and loving it, but taking it at face value what is he saying about getting in a car with that driver again?

doreuol · 11/10/2025 13:39

DeadMansBones · 11/10/2025 13:37

I don't know the other boys parents at all or I would be very tempted to tell them. It's so bloody scary to think what could happen

I would find out by some means ie SM . The parents need to know!

Thatmoves · 11/10/2025 13:39

DeadMansBones · 11/10/2025 13:37

I don't know the other boys parents at all or I would be very tempted to tell them. It's so bloody scary to think what could happen

So this is a new friend?

you know the friend’s name, from school? Where there is a will there’s a way

you could contact school and say you are trying to get hold of these parents and could the school could please ask the parents if they are happy for the school to share their contact with you or something to that effect

Thatmoves · 11/10/2025 13:40

doreuol · 11/10/2025 13:39

I would find out by some means ie SM . The parents need to know!

Show quote history

This would be my sole objective in the OP’s shoes

Luxio · 11/10/2025 13:41

DeadMansBones · 11/10/2025 13:37

I don't know the other boys parents at all or I would be very tempted to tell them. It's so bloody scary to think what could happen

If you don't know his parents then definitely report it to the police. He will do it again and next time he might not be so lucky in getting away without killing himself, his passengers or other motorists.

tripleginandtonic · 11/10/2025 13:42

It's on him. He needs to learn how to say no and not get in the car.

BridasShieldWall · 11/10/2025 13:43

What do you think would get through to him? My son is learning to drive and many of his friends have passed their tests. He has been in cars with them, getting lifts to rugby and going out. We’ve had chats about the dangers and I trust the kids he is going out with and it’s not driving late at night, I feel it’s more likely to happen when the roads are clearer. We live close to a town and rural areas and the back roads driven fast and at night are lethal. Is your son learning to drive? I find it hard to believe he didn’t realise the speed they were going in addition to the 67 risky incidents. It’s madness and only a matter of time before they have an accident. Was anyone else in the car and do you know the driver?
It sounds like a group of boys egging each other on,

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