The psychology behind peoples WhatsApp settings

[lovenotwar149]

SoI have WhatsApp and you can see my 'last seen' etc
I have a few contacts that have hidden this so when I msg them I cannot see when they were last online nor do the ticks go blue when they have read my message. The only time I see 'online' with these contacts is if they reply to my message and start typing when I am messaging them.

Why do you think ppl have their 'last seen' hidden? I find it suspicious tbh

There are but not to turn off individual read receipts. They are on or off for everyone or nobody. Trust me I've tried 😆.

My phone is for my convenience and not others. I prefer to read messages and respond in my own time. I also prioritise answering messages and who/when I need to answer. It's simply a way of managing expectations.

I might have my phone in my hand messing around for ages and still not choose to respond to messages because I don't feel like it.

I've had contacts who commented on my Last Seen: "You were up late last night" or "You got up early" or "I see you had a lie-in this morning"
It felt really intrusive and uncomfortable and weird for me.

Why do you think ppl have their 'last seen' hidden? I find it suspicious tbh

I have my ‘last seen hidden’.

I also have my read receipts off.

I hate when people expect me to reply to messages instantly, or people knowing if I’m online then why am I not responding straight away. I suffer with ill health (both physically and mentally) some times I just don’t want to reply to messages right away.

I don’t give a fuck if people find it suspicious.

Same.
Or I read a message and want to think about it before replying (in maybe a few minutes, or maybe at the end of the day). Going off a couple of friends (who are great but have a very different WhatsApp approach to me) they’d question why their message was read but not responded to right away.

You'd hate me OP, I don't even have my whatsapp notifications turned on- so I only see new messages when I choose to go into the app and look.

I have my ticks turned off because otherwise people are overly invested on whether you're online or not, as this thread demonstrates.

I can understand why. It stops people being like you saw my post at 10:41, it is now 10:34 why haven't you responded.

Uhhhh that is weird.

I always lock down my privacy on every app as much as possible. Just seems like common sense to me. I find it more weird that anyone else would find that weird.

I think you need to learn the difference between secrecy and privacy.

I also think you need to ask yourself why you feel you need/want to know exactly when all your friends are online or using specific messaging apps? Why do you feel it’s any of your business? What difference does it make to you? That level of nosiness / obsession would be a red flag to me.

I actually haven’t disabled my ‘last seen’ setting on WhatsApp myself, but I certainly would disable it if I had the kinds of contexts who looked at it all the time to keep tabs on when I was online or not.

I have mine hidden cos I am self employed and sometime I don’t have time to answer or deal with that specific client at that time. I might however have time in a moment to deal with a quick questions so I don’t want someone thinking i am ignoring them

I am the same as a PP. Only my partner can see my last seen. I am really suffering from being constantly harassed online and in person. People do actually start harassing you if you don't answer. It really fucks me off. I am busy! Or if I'm not busy, I just don't have the interest or bandwidth to answer. It's often banal shit anyway or asking me for favours.

However, even with it off people will still ask if you've seen it etc. Just fuck off!

It’s for people who say stuff like. Why didn’t you reply? What do you mean you were busy, I saw you online?

I have it set that way because I just chose that setting when I initially downloaded it.

I'll sometimes check to see if a message has been received if it's something time sensitive but I don't get the obsession with last seens. I've had friends in the past take them incredibly seriously and spend time watching their partners statuses.

I just see it as, if someone wanted to reply to you they would. People get busy, or have other things on their mind, even if they've been online and not responded, it's not always a personal slight, they might just have stuff going on. Or maybe they don't want to respond, which is something outside of your control anyway.

....ballsed it up... hang on...

I have mine hidden. Sometimes I just glance at a message when I'm in the middle of something else (eg work) so I can't reply right away. I don't want people sitting waiting for a reply, thinking I've seen the message and am deliberately not responding. I don't need that pressure. People don't need to be aware of when I happen to glance at my phone.

Just google it?! Can nobody do anything for themselves?

I disabled last online because I didn't want to see when other people were last online. Pathetic as it is, I found it bad for my mental health as there were some occasions where it gave away the fact that I was being excluded from a group.

this. nothing suss just this.

suspicious and a red flag 😂

mine is hidden to everyone but my husband and children.

personally I find messaging has become so obtrusive over the years, people take offence if you read and don’t reply or if you’ve been online to for example message someone something but not opened their message. Quite frankly I don’t need the pressure of others sending follow up messages or questioning how I use my time.

@minipie

She's dead keen on 'O'.

Agree with this, if I read my mils message and don’t respond straightaway she gets so offended.

If I don’t respond to one of my friends messages straight after reading it she sends me another to ask why I haven’t responded! Yet she can go days without responding to mine!

I haven’t read the thread but I hide mine because there are people who get angsty about how long it takes you to reply. I have a busy life with lots going on and the last thing I need is to feel policed about how I use my own phone in my own time.

You're asking the wrong question. When it comes to the psychology behind peoples WhatsApp settings, the more interesting question is why do people feel the need to know when other people have been online.

I thought it was quite outdated to have your last seen available. I’ve had mine off for years and I really don’t need to know when other people last checked their messages and don’t expect immediate responses, etc.