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Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

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Holluschickie · 04/10/2025 17:48

If ever there was a thread that deserved to be hid...

AnyoneWhoHasAHeart · 04/10/2025 17:49

cardibach · 04/10/2025 17:46

I was the one who picked up ‘they’. It wasn5 to suggest it was a gender issue, but to ask why the passenger was lumped in with the offence. Fairly obviously, I thought.

Well quite. But some people on here never miss an opportunity to turn a thread into a gender debate 🙄.

I might start referring to people as “they” on every thread 😂

Toofficeornot · 04/10/2025 17:49

I know two people who died in road traffic accidents in their teens. I had a fair few scrapes. A young driver wrote his car off and mine crashing into my oarked car just a year ago at 2am. It is so very sad when this happens. Adding the dubai situation, his parents must be in absolute agony. They seemed like good people from what I read. Trying their best with a boy whonreally did nothing wrong except be naieve and doing normal teenage things.

TheNightingalesStarling · 04/10/2025 17:53

AnyoneWhoHasAHeart · 04/10/2025 17:49

Well quite. But some people on here never miss an opportunity to turn a thread into a gender debate 🙄.

I might start referring to people as “they” on every thread 😂

The earliest reports didn't mention the sex of the driver. Its only been later that details about him have been released. "They" was correct this morning.

cardibach · 04/10/2025 17:55

AnyoneWhoHasAHeart · 04/10/2025 17:49

Well quite. But some people on here never miss an opportunity to turn a thread into a gender debate 🙄.

I might start referring to people as “they” on every thread 😂

But you interpreted my obviously ‘why they not he?’ Post as trying to turn it into a gender issue when a poster inadvertently said “they”
So I’m not sure what your point is.

cardibach · 04/10/2025 17:56

TheNightingalesStarling · 04/10/2025 17:53

The earliest reports didn't mention the sex of the driver. Its only been later that details about him have been released. "They" was correct this morning.

Not by the time that happened I don’t think. Plus it was obviously an attempt to put some of the blame on the passenger, not an attempt to be gender neutral.

MissScarletInTheBallroom · 04/10/2025 17:56

Clavinova · 04/10/2025 17:22

Nevertheless, he was more than 'a couple of months' older than the girl as you suggested.

I don't really understand the point you're making. Why do you think a 10 month age gap is a bigger issue than a 2-3 month age gap? If his birthday was in September and hers was in July they'd be in the same school year. Would anyone be talking about the "age gap" in that scenario?

Clavinova · 04/10/2025 18:07

MissScarletInTheBallroom · 04/10/2025 17:56

I don't really understand the point you're making. Why do you think a 10 month age gap is a bigger issue than a 2-3 month age gap? If his birthday was in September and hers was in July they'd be in the same school year. Would anyone be talking about the "age gap" in that scenario?

I don't really understand the point you're making

It's quite obvious, you claimed that the girl was only 'a couple of months' younger than Marcus - I was correcting you. His legal team fudged/lied about the age gap, albeit by months, not years. They obviously made a deliberate decision to do that.

Soontobe60 · 04/10/2025 18:11

Slightyamusedandsilly · 04/10/2025 15:59

Exactly this. It's like the BBC documentary this week never happened.

Women, people of colour, gay/trans people are not safe from the very people supposed to protect them.

Black people in the UK die in police cells. A stop and search could mean death.

Data shows that between 2012 and 2021 there have been 119 deaths in police custody involving restraint. 23 were Black, 86 were White, 5 were Asian and 4 were mixed race.
Black people are around 6 times more likely to die in police custody, assuming constant demographic profiles. That’s pretty stark.
https://www.inquest.org.uk/police-racism-report-2023#:~:text=From%20IOPC%20data%20obtained%20by,and%204%20were%20mixed%20race.

NEW REPORT: Black men seven times more likely to die following police restraint but racism not being addressed

20 February 2023

https://www.inquest.org.uk/police-racism-report-2023#:~:text=From%20IOPC%20data%20obtained%20by,and%204%20were%20mixed%20race.

MissScarletInTheBallroom · 04/10/2025 18:14

Clavinova · 04/10/2025 18:07

I don't really understand the point you're making

It's quite obvious, you claimed that the girl was only 'a couple of months' younger than Marcus - I was correcting you. His legal team fudged/lied about the age gap, albeit by months, not years. They obviously made a deliberate decision to do that.

There's no need to fudge. There is no meaningful age gap here.

Clavinova · 04/10/2025 18:19

MissScarletInTheBallroom · 04/10/2025 18:14

There's no need to fudge. There is no meaningful age gap here.

His legal team obviously thought there was good reason.

powershowerforanhour · 04/10/2025 18:27

Soontobe60 · 04/10/2025 18:11

Data shows that between 2012 and 2021 there have been 119 deaths in police custody involving restraint. 23 were Black, 86 were White, 5 were Asian and 4 were mixed race.
Black people are around 6 times more likely to die in police custody, assuming constant demographic profiles. That’s pretty stark.
https://www.inquest.org.uk/police-racism-report-2023#:~:text=From%20IOPC%20data%20obtained%20by,and%204%20were%20mixed%20race.

But there are more than twice as many people who identify as Asian/British Asian in UK as there are Black people. So are the cops going particularly gently on Asian people?
Or is this "assuming constant demographic profiles" a false assumption?

wizzbitt · 04/10/2025 18:31

People on here desperately trying to justify their unconscious bias and outright racism. God forbid any black, male young adult gets in a car as a passenger after midnight. Clearly involved in criminal behaviour 🙄

Functioningdisaster · 04/10/2025 19:04

OneBadKitty · 04/10/2025 14:07

Don't know why so many here are painting him as an innocent victim. He broke the law in Dubai, for which he claimed ignorance of but that's not likely, the strict laws about sex and alcohol are well publicised, and he was accompanying a friend who has broken the law here too. He had no driving licence, no insurance, was driving dangerously and failed to stop for the police. It's not likely he was just an innocent passenger and not privy to his friend's illegal driving. He sounds reckless at best.

He didn't deserve to die and it's sad for his family. It is however very lucky that no innocent members of the public were killed in the smash because we'd be looking at a whole different ball game then.

The driver deserves no sympathy whatsoever!

Because what happened to him in Dubai was due to the mother of the daughter hated the fact a person of colour had sex with her daughter and as such waited till she left the country and then phoned the police. The actions here were racist and as such damaged a boy that hadn't been in trouble previously.

He wasn't the one driving . He was a passenger.

If he wasn't black I suspect neither situation would have happened to him.

Your comments are so ignorant.

Lampzade · 04/10/2025 19:08

wizzbitt · 04/10/2025 18:31

People on here desperately trying to justify their unconscious bias and outright racism. God forbid any black, male young adult gets in a car as a passenger after midnight. Clearly involved in criminal behaviour 🙄

Absolutely .
It is disgusting

SpudsAndCarrots · 04/10/2025 19:09

Nanny0gg · 04/10/2025 16:49

He wasn't a 'criminal' when she reported him for what would go totally unremarked in this country

Laws on age of consent follow the higher out of the country of residence and the country the act takes place in. Just like someone can't come to the UK from a country where the age of consent is 14 and argue that a 17 year old could have sex with them because its legal in their country.

nomas · 04/10/2025 19:22

Functioningdisaster · 04/10/2025 19:04

Because what happened to him in Dubai was due to the mother of the daughter hated the fact a person of colour had sex with her daughter and as such waited till she left the country and then phoned the police. The actions here were racist and as such damaged a boy that hadn't been in trouble previously.

He wasn't the one driving . He was a passenger.

If he wasn't black I suspect neither situation would have happened to him.

Your comments are so ignorant.

Because what happened to him in Dubai was due to the mother of the daughter hated the fact a person of colour had sex with her daughter and as such waited till she left the country and then phoned the police. The actions here were racist and as such damaged a boy that hadn't been in trouble previously.

This is an assumption and totally made up. No one knows why she reported him. Asian parents tend to sweep things under the carpet, not involve police.

It’s not even known they were Sikh. I haven’t seen any credible news media mention their race. Where’s your proof?

Schoolchoicesucks · 04/10/2025 19:27

Functioningdisaster · 04/10/2025 19:04

Because what happened to him in Dubai was due to the mother of the daughter hated the fact a person of colour had sex with her daughter and as such waited till she left the country and then phoned the police. The actions here were racist and as such damaged a boy that hadn't been in trouble previously.

He wasn't the one driving . He was a passenger.

If he wasn't black I suspect neither situation would have happened to him.

Your comments are so ignorant.

This. His poor family.

AliceMcK · 04/10/2025 19:30

HRchatter · 04/10/2025 14:43

I drove a golf GTI convertible when I was 19 proper boy race the car that I absolutely couldn’t afford in the eyes of most police officers or anybody else for that matter.
Never stopped once, And you’ve got no idea what colour I am.

These cars were extremely popular with the Asian grooming gangs in my home town, the police never bothered stopping them either.

NamelessNancy · 04/10/2025 19:34

This thread is so upsetting. Imagine trying to come up with reasons that the death of a teenager is anything other than tragic. His poor, poor family.

TwistyTales · 04/10/2025 19:36

NamelessNancy · 04/10/2025 19:34

This thread is so upsetting. Imagine trying to come up with reasons that the death of a teenager is anything other than tragic. His poor, poor family.

On a site aimed at parents, no less. It is pretty low.

BlondeFool · 04/10/2025 19:37

NamelessNancy · 04/10/2025 19:34

This thread is so upsetting. Imagine trying to come up with reasons that the death of a teenager is anything other than tragic. His poor, poor family.

His poor family. Some of the posts are disgraceful. I’ve reported a few.

Functioningdisaster · 04/10/2025 19:39

nomas · 04/10/2025 19:22

Because what happened to him in Dubai was due to the mother of the daughter hated the fact a person of colour had sex with her daughter and as such waited till she left the country and then phoned the police. The actions here were racist and as such damaged a boy that hadn't been in trouble previously.

This is an assumption and totally made up. No one knows why she reported him. Asian parents tend to sweep things under the carpet, not involve police.

It’s not even known they were Sikh. I haven’t seen any credible news media mention their race. Where’s your proof?

I have never mentioned the girl parents race, nor even the fact they are Asian or even Sikh. You have mentioned it in your post.

It is well documented that the mother of the daughter returned to England before reporting him for sleeping with her daughter. This is fact.

Lampzade · 04/10/2025 19:46

Mumsnet has become a cesspit
Racism, anti semitism is rife

nomas · 04/10/2025 19:51

Functioningdisaster · 04/10/2025 19:39

I have never mentioned the girl parents race, nor even the fact they are Asian or even Sikh. You have mentioned it in your post.

It is well documented that the mother of the daughter returned to England before reporting him for sleeping with her daughter. This is fact.

The point is the girl and mum could be black as well for all we know.

So why do you assume she was racist?

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