Can you get me some Euthanasia tablets?

[OdeToTheNorthWestWind]

Just seen a slightly rattled friend, whose 88 year old mother made the request. After a bit of gentle questioning, she promised to buy her mum some Echinacea tablets to fend off winter bugs, the next time she is in town. 😄

What strange requests have you had?

Though you could argue that she was right!

My grandma in her 80's asked the shop assistant in Tesco where the condoms were. The young lad pointed her to the pharmacy. 'No no' she said, 'the ones you eat for breakfast with jam on'. She meant croissants.

Her Christmas present that year from my sister was a pack of croissants with a pack of durex stuck to the front.

LOL!!!!

Brilliant!

We were confused when our young son kept impatiently asking when we were going to shower as we all had already washed. Actually he wanted to know when we were leaving to visit the city Bath

My mum said she was telling the lady next door she’d come for a lovely visit and never seen so many cockroaches.

Woodlice, mum.

In the 90s my (very religious and very straight-laced) boss was the editor of the company newsletter, which was a lavish production, printed on paper.

When they arrived from the printer, he distributed them to all the staff and made up several parcels to be sent to out numerous foreign outposts:

Several people emailed him, pointing out that he had forgotten the 'L' in the word 'public' in a story about a government department. He had to bin the 1000s of newsletters he had received and get them corrected and reprinted at vast expense. He must have been absolutely mortified.

Great aunt was offered Communion by a CofE hospital chaplain but she belonged to a different denomination so she said ‘yes, but I’ve not been circumcised’.
Realised later she meant ‘confirmed’.

A patient told me she preferred houmous from the local Lesbianese deli to that from M&S.

Oh I seeee. Awkward!

I went into our local baker's shop and asked for "4 busty cruns"

Rather like my husband trying to ask in his best French for the baker's recommendation when trying to buy a pastry and actually asking for 'the house tart'.

They don't sound the same to me.

Someone created a thread recently on here about their partner and she was complaining about him, she meant to say he is like Jekyll and Hyde, except she called it Jacqueline Hyde:

Im actually not enjoying this .. I’m confused with the behavior it’s like jacqueline high? I just wanted some clarification and opinions.
Go to post
8/08/2025 04:43
· 18/08/2025 04:37
Who is Jaqueline High?
It’s a saying, when someone act one way to you, then the next act different.

Another poster went on to create a username JacquelineHyde in honour of their confusion.
https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5393839-why-does-he-remember-everything-i-post?page=1

I went to talk on English idioms and their origins. The 'expert' speaker told us that the saying, 'to pass the book', was a corruption of 'to pass the buck'. The whole audience were scratching their heads - none of us had heard anyone say or write about passing 'the book'.

Ooo error missus

😂 i wish he had

😂

😂That's not something you see every day

Son told me a few weeks ago that his friend had told him, via text message, that he was on holiday in Dumb Fries. Where the hell is that, I asked. 'Somewhere in Scotland' - Dumfries, I finally established.

When DD was three, her friends included Mr Tilda (Matilda) and Waitress (Beatrice).

My kids are great for mishearing and then doing these....
Memory is awful but one from this week -

10 yeah old - 'What car did she drive? Was it a vulva?'

My son had a friend called Book (Brooke) and a girlfriend called Coleman (Carmen). 🤣

My niece asked me how to get to my place from Saint pancreas station

"They've said he's got cardboard tunnel syndrome"
"The instructor had one of those George-control cars"

and my personal favourite:

"My dad had Arthur-itis" 😂