DS just bum shuffled and I could cry

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I desperately don’t want him to be a bum shuffler but I knew it was likely to be on the cards because he has always hated tummy time and was pretty late to roll.

Bum shuffling is linked to all sorts of developmental delay, dyspraxia, dyslexia etc. I’ve just read a study that stated half of bum shufflers went on to be diagnosed with ASD.

I just feel very sad that I can see a tricky future mapped out for him. I will forever ask myself if we could have done more to encourage tummy time but in the early days he just screamed and screamed and in the later days he was just not fussed about it and would roll onto his back.

Crawling is so important for developing visual acuity, handwriting, visual spatial skills etc. I am just absolutely heartbroken for him.

DH bless him doesn’t have a clue about the implications and is sitting there cheering him and proudly videoing it 😔 I’ve had to come out of the room I just feel sick and so gutted.

As I said. Misogynistic.

I'll tell you what'll cause him problems in life.

You, if you don't get a grip.

I read the title and thought you wanted to cry with happiness, not batshittery.

That was my initial thought too when I opened this thread. I was all set to offer congratulations.

To the OP, I have a lot of respect for academic research but motor development progression is not linear for everyone and the researchers probably had a very messy looking scatter plot, especially if dealing with a large population. unless there are other ASD symptoms of concern such as lack of eye contact, I wouldn’t worry too much.

And even if your child has ASD, there is again a very wide range of outcomes. It’s not a death sentence and we are fortunate to be living in a time when there is increased awareness.

No child is perfect and even the healthy ones can be beset with MH difficulties later on. Us older parents have seen this in our kids’ age cohort. I would rather have my somewhat needy ASD son with learning difficulties than deal with the severe MH issues that I have seen in other families.

My son was a bum shuffler and didn’t walk until he was 17 months.

I can’t say we gave it much thought.

He is now 24 and has always been an extremely high achiever. Was talking far sooner than his peers, completely dry both day and night by 2. First class degree, masters with distinction. Was on the ‘gifted and talented’ pathway at school. No ASD traits whatsoever.

OP, get your s* together and as we say where I am from, catch yourself on!

Your post is horrifying, you are heartbroken? See a tricky future mapped out? You feel sick and are so gutted? All because your child is bumshuffling?

If this is genuine you really need some treatment for your Catastrophising and anxiety. You will drive yourself mad reading studies and worrying about every wee thing.

And as an aside I have two ASD children, both very different and both absolute champion crawlers.

It's fucking crazy on here tonight

Where are you getting your stats from. I have a degree in early childhood studies and have NEVER heard this. It sounds ridiculous IMO. My little girl was a bum shuffler (only when no one was watching tho obviously) she crawled by 9 months and took 1st steps week after her 1st birthday. Bum shuffling does not mean your child is doomed its a totally normal developmental milestone

This is stupid my DS hit all his milestones he crawled just before 9months and was walking at 12 months he’s autistic so really I wouldn’t believe everything you read online.

My Mum an early year specialist…me awkward squad declined to read until quite late. Then exams through to grammar school, law, MA the works. Love that beautiful baby, help where needed. That’s it really

Er not to show off (sorry!) but my brother, sister and I all bum shuffled and we all three got into the very best universities in the country. All happily married, no developmental issues ever

don’f write your kid off!

My ASD & ADHD child crawled and walked by 11 months, no speech delays, potty trained aged 2. Stop worrying, you have no idea at this stage. As long as baby is happy and healthy that’s all that matters. My son is neurodiverse and absolutely smashes everything he puts his mind to. X

Get a grip of yourself. This is madness. Plenty of kids bum shuffle, hence the high proportion who go on to have additional needs.

So 58% of bum shufflers are not diagnosed with ASD. Over half of bum shufflers do not have an ASD diagnosis.

You must have seen/heard the research that a small glass of red wine will mean you live longer. Well, they further explored this and discovered alcohol in any quantity is still poison to your body. However, people who drink red wine once a day tend to be more affluent which means they can access better food on the whole, can afford to join a gym, probably aren’t working two jobs and so have the time to exercise, may live in areas with less air pollution, have better access to programmes when they want to quit drinking/smoking, can pay for therapy and tend to have better medical provision. Any number of these things might be the reasons for a longer life expectancy. Likely all of the above. Not the wine. But this is the issue when you focus on one particular issue.

Your son might have Autism/ADHD. If he does, it’s likely that you or your husband have it. No amount of tummy time would have changed the genetics of the situation. There may be other developmental delays (which you haven’t mentioned) and so he may just be a bum shuffler. Kids develop at their own rate, they do their own things. If there are multiple areas that he is behind, you should speak to your HV or GP.

I know you’re upset that you’ve been accused of writing him off but you have. You’ve assumed the worst thing that can happen to him is that he’s autistic (which is hugely insulting and you’ve pissed off a lot of people with that insinuation). It’s not the worst thing. By any stretch of the imagination.

Heartbroken?
op, I say this, along with so many others who have done the same, with kindness: step away from Google.

I bum shuffled, walked around 18 months. Of my 3 DC, only one crawled. One rolled and one bum shuffled. The bum shuffler was last to walk, has an Oxbridge degree and a 6 figure salary. His first child, also a bum shuffler, developing fine. There are no diagnoses of ASD in our family.

What utter nonsense. Poor child.

Why would you forever ask if you’d done enough for tummy time? If he has autism or adhd or dyslexia then it was always already there… it was the cause of the symptom not the other way around. You wouldn’t have been able to tummy time him out of a learning difficulty.

If 50% of bum shufflers go on to have ASD then 50% are perfectly neurotypical. He may just dislike tummy time!

As the mother of a disabled child who does have a tricky path mapped out I find the OPs post very offensive, and quite frankly ridiculous. I've no idea why you would think it's driven by misogyny?

My DD crawled. She has ASD.
She is also wonderful, intelligent, thoughtful and loving and I am incredibly proud of her.

In my sample size of two, my bum shuffler is neurotypical and has sailed through school pretty easily. My commando crawler has multiple complex disabilities and will never live fully independently.

What a horrible post.

I wish I didn't click.

ffs

OP, have you been to your GP/Health visitor?
It’s just that if there is a physical reason for the bum shuffling, such as hypermobility or hip dysplasia, your DC might need to see a paediatrician or physio.

Are you known for overreacting? What tosh!

I think that statement says more about you than OP.