Anyone free for a handhold? I’m losing my DM tonight 💔

[morecoffeeee]

4 years I have been her carer, she’s fought through so much but is not strong enough for anymore battles. I’m sat bedside and will stay firmly here for the night - I never knew the end would be so painful to witness. I don’t want to cry because I don’t want her to see, she’s already so distressed. There’s no-one that can sit with me and my heart is smashed into a 1000 pieces 😢

So sorry for your loss @morecoffeeee be kind to yourself & hold your loved ones close. Wishing you peace & space for the happier memories to rise to the surface💞💗sending hugs xx

@morecoffeeee I'm sorry for the pain your feeling right now. Be proud that you were there until the end. The following days will be a roller coaster of emotions, or you may feel quite numb. Take care of yourself now xx 💐

Be kind to yourself ❤

So sad to read your post and can feel every emotion you went through. You did your mum proud. I’m thinking of you right now and hope you find a little peace, however small, tonight 🤍

So sorry for your loss OP. I know it's hard but try to take comfort in knowing you were with her to the end and she passed knowing how loved she was and what a wonderful daughter she has raised.

Take care, sending lots of love and strength x

I'm so sorry for your loss OP. You take lots of care

I am so sorry you lost your lovely mum. She sounds amazing. 💔

I have been thinking of you OP and your lovely mum with her sparkly blue eyes. I hope in time you can play Luther Vandross and dance around your kitchen. But for now sending you love and peaceful thoughts lovely girl x

You've gone full circle from mum and tiny baby entering the world to tall daughter and tiny mum leaving the world, cuddling her as she did you as a baby and showing her how much you love her. Often it’s not possible to be there at the time of death but you were. Losing your mum is difficult as I know. Take strength in all the good times you shared. x

So sorry for your loss, I lost my mum nearly 8 years ago to the day, think of her nearly every day and still miss her. You have shown such love for her being there xx

I’m so sorry for your loss Op xx

I’m so so sorry OP.
take heart @Middlemarch123 - I’ve had my fair share of death experiences (parents are both vicars and I trained as a nurse) and often people hold on until loved ones aren’t with them. It’s not uncommon and not a reflection on you - sometimes it’s just the way they go. The love is the important bit and that is there if you are or not.

Thank you so much, my DD is an ITU doctor, and has said the same, she’s experienced so many family members sitting by a bed for hours on end, then just popping out for a loo break or to get a drink, and their loved one slips away in that short time. She was sitting with her nan the night before she passed, and said “mum, she’s gone, her spirits gone, she’s with grandpa now”, she could tell by the change in her breathing. But I have kicked myself every day since, that I wasn’t there.

You’ve made me feel better, bless you.

It's really difficult. So sorry for your loss.
Only getting back to normalish three years on.
Kids took it hard which may have made the recovery longer as we had not much support at all practically or emotionally.

Everybody grieves differently. Everybody copes differently. There is no right or wrong way to grieve. Do what is right for you.

your welcome @Middlemarch123 I’m glad I could help a little. Such a funny thing, death. Such a fleeting moment but carries so much weight.

I’m so sorry morecoffeee for the heartbreaking loss of your darling mum💔 sending love to you and your family as you navigate the days ahead. The beautiful memories you shared with us are just a small part of the lifetime of love you had together and that love will give you the strength to face the future without her🙏🏻
Take care of yourself ❤️‍🩹💐

With every comfort I could bring is for you and you and your loss. RIP 💕
Be safe and strong @morecoffeeee xx

With every comfort I could bring is for you and your loss. RIP mum 💕
Be safe and strong @morecoffeeee xx

I'm so sorry OP ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

@morecoffeeee I am so sorry for your loss. You did so well, being her support and anchor as she got more ill, and her body prepared to stop.💔

Right now, the pain is feeling unbearable. In time, you will remember so many fun and loving memories and though while still sad, you being with her at the end will be a loving memory to treasure.

I’m still here - absolutely drowning right now, I didn’t know pain like this even exists. Been sat on my bedroom floor for hours just sobbing, I’m an alien to my poor DCs right now and it’s breaking my heart even more 💔

I am so sorry @morecoffeeee The loss of a beloved parent is an awful, wrenching milestone, which we go through so it won't be the other way round. At least that's what I told myself when I lost my lovely Dad. Many condolences to you and yours.

So sorry for your loss. You've been so brave and given your mum everything you could as she passed. Don't try and hide your grief it only hurts you more. Your family's love will be there to support you too

@morecoffeeee Ive posted a couple of times on this thread, sadly I'm About 10 days ahead of you on this heartbreaking journey (my mum died after a 15 month illness on the 13/8)
So honestly hand on heart, I understand, as does everyone on here what your going through. Take it day by day, hour by hour. Your family (i hope) will still love and support you no matter how much of a mess you are, and being an emotional mess is very much expected.
Pratical questions, are you eating enough? Drinking enough? And sleeping enough?
Thinking of you very much xx

Hi @FunnyCrabDanceThank you for your reply, I was a mess when I wrote earlier but managed to drag myself off from the bedroom floor and wash my hair (first time in 7 days - yikes!)
I’m so sorry to hear about your Mum, sending love across the internet and strength too ❤️
My family are somewhat dysfunctional but are constantly in contact, I’m mostly ignoring everyone apart from the odd reply.
DH isn’t coping being the primary parent, he was fine for a few days but his patience is wearing thin which makes me feel like I need to hurry up with my grieving 😔 I’m sure that’s not the case but I feel like I need to put my big girl pants on and just cope (like I always do). Definitely not eating enough, but plenty of tea and water, sleeping is tough - I wake up with tears down my face so I dread drifting off again.
I’m registering her death tomorrow which just feels surreal, can I gently ask if you did that and how it was? X x x