Feeling a bit sad - ‘friend’ blocked and deleted me from fb.

[GirlPolo]

And I have no idea why! She was one of my very closest friends, we were having discussions about days out over the summer hols and I went to message her only to see that she’s blocked and deleted me. I just cannot understand it. There were no disagreements, it was all good when we saw each other. I genuinely thought we were best friends. Or at least very, very close friends. Even if she unblocks me the friendship is done, I can’t get past this 😔
Anyone had anything similar happen to them?

Tbh I always find it a bit difficult to sympathise with these people who know someone has form for treating people badly and then seem upset when they do the same to them. It was surely a matter of time. And tbh I find it somewhat arrogant that someone in that situation would feel that they’re somehow special and above that kind of treatment.

Personally I find the actual blocking of people utterly pathetic behaviour with the exception of actual abuse. It’s one thing to unfriend someone from social media, people do it for all sorts of reasons, but to actually block someone sends a very deliberate message and tells you everything about the kind of person they are.

But if as you say she has form then this shouldn’t have come as a surprise.

I’ve just blocked & ghosted someone in the past. I found out she was saying unpleasant things about me behind my back whilst supposedly being my friend. Trouble never seemed far when she was around either. I decided that she didn’t deserve or need an explanation - I just cancelled her from my life entirely. Worse than that, when I saw her a couple of years later, I smiled, said hello and kept walking as if nothing had happened.
I just wasn’t willing to put any energy into explaining it because there was no coming back from it.

I hate Facebook for this reason and others. My account was hacked last year (despite 2 factor authentication) and I made an initial attempt to get it back and failed. I gave up on it completely and don’t miss any of this kind of nonsense at all. Unfriending someone like this is a horrible thing to do and can can have a real adverse impact on friendships and relationships, leaving the poor person struggling with ‘well, what did I do to deserve this?’.

OP, she might have meant to block the person above or below you in her friend list. I would reach out to her, in case it was an error.

She won’t have done this on a whim

So why are you surprised? She's got form.

Is your life going particularly well and it might be a bit painful for her? I had a close friend drop out of my life when I was pregnant with my third. She had been trying unsuccessfully to get pregnant for years, since I had my first. There are no hard feelings from me.

Exactly

A bunch of silly childish adults no doubt, all obsessed with SM and all see friendship status on Facebook as a way of either conveying whether you have a beef with them. All so very silly

I agree this is very possible. I've seen that lots of times and thought that I have been unfriended!

Exactly the same thing happened to me. We'd been close for many years, but then she just stopped replying to my messages although she might very occasionally like one of my posts.

The most hurtful part was the stuff, non-commital messages i got back when I told her my brother had died, then no further response despite my reply.

She does live in a different country now, but years ago I also lived abroad for a time and I stayed in touch.

This is painful and hard.

You won’t ever find out why.

As hard as it is, I would just leave it and try to move on.

It is lame behaviour and even if she did unblock you and you became friendly again, you’d be on eggshells wondering when she’d do it again.

Yes, I mean, they were the people I thought would be there for support. Then I realised they hadn't bothered to just ask, "Hey, how are you going?" at any point, like a friend should. So about 14 months after the event, I cleared them out of my life. No room for fake friends. These sorts of things have a way of showing who your true friends are.

😂😂😂

Do you honestly really want to be friends with someone who has form for doing this?

With people like this it is only a matter of time before they do it to you.

@DarklingIlisten - I disagree. Treating other people kindly and respectfully should be a given. I think generally there’s more entitlement around these days - a ‘I don’t wanna do that, so I won’t’. I see it in the workplace too.

I have distanced myself a little from friendships in the past, or lost touch with people and not been sad about it - that’s life - but it’s never been a cut contact/ghosting thing. To do that to someone you once called a friend is pretty vile, and it doesn’t make the person left wondering on the other side some sort of psycho. Tbh I think if you think people ‘should’ be so relaxed about it, maybe your friendships are really casual in the first place?

Also - if you truly want to cut contact rather than let a friendship politely drift, why not just explain yourself? I had one friend who basically ended our friendship because I was pg with my third and she was struggling with fertility issues and in a bad relationship. She explained why she didn’t want to continue to hang out with me - sad, but she had the decency to explain. She then moved out of the city I’m in and that was that. I don’t have any hard feelings there.

I am going against the grain here but I’m really struggling to believe that someone would block you for absolutely no reason when you are the best of friends. If you are as upset as you say, you need to think of all your interactions with her and whether you’re being completely honest about your own behaviour. If you are unreliable or flaky, maybe she got sick of this over time, even if she didn’t say so, and just decided it was best to cut off contact. all of the advice on here about going to see her or calling her is aggressive and a bad idea. She has set a boundary and made it clear that she does not want contact with you and you need to respect that. Maybe she is ‘nutsy’ and done it before — so what. I find it odd people are just assuming that must be it. She can do that though, she isn’t obliged to explain anything to you. I’m sorry as I know as what it’s like to lose a friend and you can feel hurt and sad, but you need to accept that’s what she wants and not be creepy about trying to get in touch with her.

How long were you friends for op?
That is odd/shitty behaviour from her

If you read the OP’s updates she has form for this so may be entirely on a whim.

Hahaha

Do you not have her phone number or something?

you are adults, call her and ask what’s going on?

100% this

She will LOVE the fact you have got someone else involved and are trying to contact her.

Take your dignity, tell the other person not to contact her on your behalf, and leave her to her games