DH wants to wear shorts to birthday meal

[Lins77]

I've arranged a big family lunch at a very smart hotel to celebrate DH's Significant Birthday. He's worn shorts every day over the summer (he doesn't work). I said he should wear long trousers but he doesn't see why he should. What do you think?

Most wealthy people we know are complete scruffs. In many very expensive hotels, anything goes.

Why are trousers “better”? It’s not a garden party with the queen it’s a lunch in a hotel!!

Omg we have the same family. My uncle too. Except he's 70 😂

Maybe check the dress code with the hotel first.If very smart then it may not be possible anyway. Everyone seems very casual these days . long smart shorts or chinos may be acceptable .

Seriously? It’s his birthday and he’s his own person. Let him wear what he wants. Smart shorts exist you know?

Depends on the shorts. Are we talking Benidorm vibes or tailored shorts? His body shape would probably influence this too, overweight guys probably wouldn’t look smart in shorts but guys that are in shape could definitely pull off smart shorts.

Me too.

I think a lot of men look smarter and better in shorts than in trousers.

I would be very annoyed if I wanted to wear trousers to a dinner and my DH said I should wear a skirt or vice versa.

Is he likely to feel that though? My dad would want to wear shorts but he wouldn't remotely care if everyone else was in black tie when he got there.

It's summer, chino shorts are smart. Baggy jogger shorts not to much. So it depends what type of shorts he is planning on wearing

Has it been said that they’re smart chino shorts and a collard shirt ? Could be cargo shorts and a tee shirt. Could be a vest!!!!!

I think actually what’s going on with the top half may be more significant than the shorts once you’re sat down at the table. I wouldn’t have said shorts were appropriate unless you’re at the beach and it’s a shame that he can’t make a tiny effort for a nice occasion. But hey… he’s a grown up. I’d be disappointed in the OPs position.

What’s wrong with cargo shorts and a tee shirt?
Presumably the people are turning up because they want to celebrate his birthday with him? I couldn’t give a flying flamingo what my retired loved one was wearing.

I'd make him ring thd hotel and find out the dress code. Why is he being so weird about it?

So many odd, old fashioned attitudes on this thread. Very Hyacinth Bucket.

Maybe because it’s his birthday and it should be about what he wants/feels comfortable wearing?

Nothing weird about that.

And of course he can dictate to the OP what she wears, yes?

We had a couple of men in Church this morning in shorts and they looked smarter than some other men in casual trousers!

We often go to a naice 4 star seaside hotel,olde worlde,lots of brass and mahogany, afternoon tea recently, lots of the men wore smart Chino type shorts, short sleeve shirts, including DH who is 68 with perfectly good tanned legs.

Surely that should read 'I will suggest he rings the hotel' rather than 'I'd make him ring the hotel', one adult doesn't 'make' someone do something unless they want to bear the consequences. So many women are very controlling in their relationships.

If i wanted to wear something inappropriate to a nice dinner, I'd expect my husband to raise an eyebrow and advise me to change, yes

this.

because its HIS birthday

Well not if it's a very smart hotel, no. I imagine they might have a no shorts policy. It's worth the OP finding out.

Does he know where you've booked, is it a surprise. If so I'd put some trousers in the car incase he feels out of place but otherwise he can wear what he thinks fit.

Nothing inappropriate about shorts if hotel is fine with them.
It’s lunch, btw, not dinner. Not that that would make a difference.
If someone had arranged a “smart lunch” for my birthday, possibly without asking whether I actually wanted to go (may have missed if OP has replied to that question) then told me what I could or couldn’t wear, I’d say no thanks, tbh. Not wearing anything other than what I’m comfortable in for anyone.

But it's not necessarily inappropriate. In OP's opinion it is but that's only an opinion. It's not fact.

Well they’re not as smart as the alternative and it’s a smart restaurant ( and he has previous for getting it wrong).