Vegetarian not catered for

[ParrotsAteThemAll]

Invited to a bbq this afternoon, just had the message they haven’t got any vege burgers/meat alternatives. Of course I could buy my own, but why should I? The meat eaters will be having burgers, sausages, chicken whilst, yet again, I’ll be offered a salad and bun.

This happens all the time and for years I just accepted it, as I was the awkward one. I’ve mostly had to cook my own too, usually in the house as the host ‘doesn’t know how to cook a vege burger’! Surely this day it’s easy to grab something vege from any supermarket, big or small. I’m not even fussy what brand!

I’ve bought a nice bottle of wine for the host and a nice dessert to take, tempted not to take it now. Of course I’ll go enjoy the company, probably eat beforehand,

Any other veges find this frustrating, or should we accept we’re the difficult ones and take our own food?

I’ve been vegetarian for a very long time, since the days of TVP being the option, but I don’t like halloumi or mushrooms so I’d take my own food and just enjoy it as a social occasion. It is disappointing not to be asked what you’d like, though. Being vegetarian is pretty mainstream these days.

They sounds extremely weird!

I wouldn't go, sorry but if someone is not able to cater for me than I wouldn't go.

We have vegetarian friends and when we offer food, BBQ or not, we always cater for them, I learned lots of really nice veggie pasta dishes or roast tray meals by now.

For a BBQ, we checked and they are fine with food on the same grill but DH cleans it properly first and arranges it in a way that the food doesn't touch, otherwise we would have bought a disposable one as an extra.
There are plenty of dishes other than meat as well.

That's really rude and very bad hosting!

I do think a good host caters for their guests. however, your food requests are a preference, not a requirement. Hosts need to make sure that allergies and medical diets are covered, but catering for every preference can get ridiculous. Just because other people share your preference doesn’t make it special.

These sound too yummy I bet the meat eaters pinch them!

I’m a meat eater and would have done sides anyway even if no veggies there

green salad, cous cous, maybe a mozzarella one
roasted veg
halloumi
crisps and dip
Various breads
i always have stuff like pesto, sun dried tomatoes etc in the fridge so you could make a nice sandwich as well or I would offer whatever you fancied

The cheesecake sounds amazing, I don't think you need to bring wine in these circumstances. I would probably ask if I can bring my own veggie burgers to grill.

i had a friend who was asked to take her own veggie burger to someone’s WEDDING! They were having a bbq dinner and didn’t want to provide a single veggie burger for her! Absolutely shocking.

This! I have a veggie cousin and wouldn't dream of not getting something for her. Plus I make an effort with the sides, so it's not just a few bits of lettuce but potato salad, couscous, rice salad, coleslaw, hummus, dips, crudités, nice bread etc. Ridiculous not to cater for you.

I'd be quite happy with salad and a bun and I am not even a vegetarian. What do you want instead - some processed yucky alternative?

I might like something like halloumi but you could easily buy that and take it with you.

The rest of the food will be undercooked and burnt, so I wouldn't worry too much that the others are getting better food. They'll all be ill tomorrow ;)

I suspect all this will be on offer though - or at least some of it.

Even though I eat chicken I'd be a bit unimpressed if all I got was chicken in a bun. I'd definitely want some decent salad and buffet staples.

If none of the things you mentioned were on offer I'd only stay an hour and I'd find the nearest place serving (fish and) chips! Meat eaters want more than just meat and bread too.

None of our friends are veggie. Only 1 relative and 2 of her dcs. I know they are late converts after years of eating meat but I would get veggie in snd have done so.

It’s rude of them. As you say it’s not difficult to pick up a box of veggie burgers or some veggie alternative these days, there’s usually an entire fridge section to choose from now.

I have a veggie friend and their kids are mostly veggie except the odd ham sandwich because all their friends are having one 🤦‍♀️. I always make sure I’ve got something that I can offer them if they’re coming round even though they usually say they will bring something with them. My friend had a period of being vegan due to breastfeeding a Dailey allergy baby and I’d always make sure I had something to offer then too, even nipping to the shop for some oat milk so I could still offer her a cup of tea when they came round. It’s just not that difficult these days to get hold of alternative products.

I’m vegan. When I’m invited to something involving food I always ask when I rsvp if I can take anything savoury, sweet or both.
If that offer is declined, I check again nearer the time.
i genuinely don’t mind taking something to share with everyone.
I do really dislike bbq though as the smell of cooking dead animals is awful 😥 The very rare occasion I go to a bbq I would much prefer vegan burger etc to be cooked in the kitchen far away from meat or vegetarian products.

I think it is a bit mean considering they know you and how easy and available veggie burgers are. I am not vegetarian but love them, spicy bean burgers particularly. However you've been told. I'm sure they will have plenty of salad, rolls, cheese, fruit and the like.

did you go OP?

you said the message said ‘no veggie burgers or meat alternatives on the BBQ’ … but did that mean they had no catering for vegetarian's?

I wouldn’t put veggie food on a bbq with the meat. But would cater for non meat eaters in other ways.

Who sent you the message? Was it the hosts or a friend who was already there?

I am a very picky eater, it’s part of my autism unfortunately. When invited to a bbq or any kind of event I either eat before, or take along what I can eat. Everyone knows in a difficult eater, I never expect anyone to provide alternatives for me. I’m more when happy to take my own so I can have a nice time with everyone else without missing out.

i think accommodating for allergies is different as in, making sure there isn’t nuts there if someone is allergic etc

Haloumi Cheese,
Veg Burgers,
Sweet Corn
Aubergine
At the last BBQ, I ate the veg<
at BBQ of my DS, I took my own veg burgers (but then I did not mind them being cooked on the same BBQ).

I couldn't imagine inviting someone to a bbq and not catering for them. It isn't exactly difficult to pop a couple veggie/spicy bean burgers and a couple of quorn sausages in the oven and do a variety of salad/pasta salad/potato salad/coleslaw/couscous.

I second that @Hoppinggreen i want an invite too!!

Just rude to not cater for you if they know and invited you. If I was doing a bbq and wasn’t sure if people were vege, I’d always buy a packet of vege burgers, or do some vege skewers, or halloumi just in case…

They’ve obviously got a bee in their bonnet about vegetarians. I know a few like this (very rural agricultural area). I’d not go. Or go but eat beforehand and don’t take a bottle.

Veggie since 1980 and I can say I have never been to a bbq that didn’t offer veggie food too

In the early days of the 80s those Linda sausages were a revelation
Now we have so much stuff in The shops I’d be surprised if I went to a bbq and found no alternatives to meat
The only faff is making sure they are on a different or separated bbq

So yes OP I’m surprised by your experience

I’m sending this to all those who cater for all their friends