DD is pregnant at 14

[user224422]

Can’t believe I am writing this my DD is pregnant and she’s only 14. I’m shocked I posted on here for some support as I am a single parent and haven’t told anyone. My head is all over the place 😔

Ideology? What are you on about? It’s you who is ignoring reality.

Any and every option will be traumatic. The poor girl has just got to figure out which one will have the least impact on the rest of her life.

Oh OP what a huge shock. I definitely echo what others have said about contacting Marie Stopes/BPAS.

FWIW when I was younger I had a friend who had a late termination, Whilst it was traumatic, forcing her to carry to term would have been worse. She was a child in a controlling relationship with a person a couple of years older than her.

she is now grown up and married to a lovely man and has a lovely life! It doesn’t have to define your daughter.

I hope you and her get all the support you need.

Sending you and your DD lots of love OP. What a difficult time for you all, I am not surprised your head is all over the place.

If your daughter wants a termination call Marie stopes tomorrow and get some advice. Talk her through it with them. It is her choice. Things happen and she has got into trouble, she isn’t the first and she won’t be the last. Support her through it and afterwards a very careful conversation needs to happen, she has already learned consequences so just take good care of her and help her through. Lots of love to both of you. It is an awful situation to find yourself in.

This is achievable...I am so glad for your friendly x

There are going to be some difficult conversations if the child herself is going to try to figure that out, because glossing over the reality of what this will not help her do it. Bear in mind even if they can protect her from some of that now, and I don’t know how much they can, when she is older, she is going to find out more.

II stand corrected! Thank you for the information.

As is carrying to term, going through childbirth, giving up a baby, post partum recovery and then not to mention the future effects on the daughters life if her biological child decides one day to try and find her…

This 100% “Primal Wound” is a the very essence of the feeling for many adopted children, thank you for this wording.
my adoptive parents are my Mum and Dad and couldn’t have wished for better… but there has always been an underlying feeling of rejection from my “Birth Family” (although I understand the reasons from the times.. 18yr old unmarried mum from an Irish catholic family)

Glad she's told you op, I wasn't much older than your DD when I got pregnant but I didn't have nice parents and I didn't tell them until I was 24 weeks - I had no idea how far along I was myself, I just knew that the "problem" wasn't going away by itself and I was scared.
Thankfully she is still in the time frame to be able to terminate if that's what she wants, although it will be awful she still has some choices.
Wishing you and your DD the best 💐

It's the child's body and the child's choice. I am immensely grateful that we live in a country that will allow her to make that decision for herself.

@Inyournewdress

OP’s daughter I.e a child, comes first over the foetus. What is going to be best for her is what needs to happen. it really is that simple.

How old is the dad?

She'll be asleep during the procedure. Please educate yourself.

Your comment is wholly unacceptable and inappropriate.

No 14 year old should be having a baby.

She can have one, see about it tomorrow, get on the phone early.

I am sorry, it must be a shock. She's just a kid.

It's important that she knows she must not become pregnant again.

Thank Heavens she has a great supportive mum - she is going to need it. Get on it right away - time is of the essence.

How do you know that the primal wound won't become fatal? Risk taking behaviour and mental health issues can be responses to trauma, it's still preventable at this stage. Rotten, but preventable.

At least at this point there is the hope of a decent outcome for the mother and daughter that are here now.

Please stop with the moral absolutism, it does no good.

Seriously?

OP’s daughter is a child. If I was OP, this is exactly what I would be doing. My 14 year old’s wellbeing would come before anything else.

Who is the dad? Was it consensual sex? SS may need to be involved

@Thunderpants88

eh?