What fairly normal things do you not let your DC do?

[Mayflyoff]

I won't let my DC have candles, my 14 yo is not impressed. I also don't let them go on fairground rides, though I'm OK with permanent rides at theme parks. Are there things you don't let your DC do, that their friends seem to do?

Some of these have to be wind ups!

No Tvs in bedrooms. They do have their laptops in their rooms now - but they're 18 and 21!

Some of these are insane. No pierced ears till 18? No play dates? These are not remotely in the same ballpark as common sense ones like no phones till secondary school, limiting fizzy drinks, etc. Seriously, those parents are going to have some epically resentful kids in a few years’ time!

What's wrong with playdates and sleepovers?

We have a kids/parents friendship group where most parents have just one child, so playdates are saving our lives.

And we've done a couple of sleepovers too which went really well and were great fun for the kids (6 year old).

Genuinely curious !!!

No cycling on the road - my bff was killed cycling home from school when we were ten. RIP Lauren. My dc wanted to cycle to school with their friends but it was a hard no from me. I just couldn’t bear it.

No phones until high school,
No sleepovers until they were 10.
No ‘boyfriends’ unti A levels. Lads as mates yes but no intense relationships.
No cordial (squash is a sport).
No dossing about until share of the housework done. Holiday jobs from 14.
Both alive with degrees no fillings and still talking to us.

Eldest is only 2 but I'm pretty laid back. He's had squash, chocolate, McDonalds, watches screens etc and I have no plans to ban sleepovers or trampolines.

DS1 is 18 now so there's not much left to ban! I didn't allow any underage drinking until he is was 17, he was going to 18th birthday parties by then so it seemed harsh to say he couldn't. He's never been terribly interested in drinking though. He was keen to drive, and there's no way we'd have let him be insured on my car if he was into getting shit faced. But his mates are gamers, not really drinkers.

No speeding in the car and if any of his mates are sick in it or spill a drink they pay to have it cleaned!

DS2 (15) does climbing and I don't allow him to go out on the rocks with his mates without adult supervision. He has ADHD and forgets things, which you just can't do when safety is at stake.

DC never had anything but milk and water until around 5 ish when they’d have the occasional fruit shoot or squash at parties. DD who is 2 has never had any sugary drinks yet there’s just no need at this age

Oh yes I’m a bit unhinged about grapes. I always cut them and if DD1 ever takes an uncut one I am right there snapping ‘BITE INTO IT BEFORE IT GOES IN YOUR MOUTH’ and watching her through beady eyes.

A little boy died choking on a grape at a party near us a few years ago. I was involved with the emergency response and have never forgotten it. Mostly I just won’t have them in the house.

Omg yes same!! The last few bday parties (15 and 16) the parents have allowed drinking.. when it was my turn to host i said hell no. Apparently I'm so over board and ridiculous... and that's just what the other parents said about me 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

No trampolines and def no candles - fire safety briefs at work by firebrigade scared the pants off me

Candles no way (I caused havoc with candles as a teenager - very outing if I described what happened !!!)

no slushies - recent news reports have vindicated me on this one

no trampolines - new orthopaedic surgeon friend has backed me up on this one too!

if I had dd it would be no ear piercing until 15 (and ds for that matter but he’s not shown any interest)

no squash - water with meals, fresh fruit juice as a treat, fizzy drinks on holiday only

tattoos no way but they have to be 18 don’t they so I can’t stop that. I’m eternally grateful I didn’t get a tattoo in my 20s as what I wanted would not have aged well! I’d internalised my parents’ dislike of them and it was a close call otherwise I’d be lasering it off now like my friends who I was going to get it with….

Yep no alcohol for our 16 year old

Mine weren't allowed smartphones until age 14, no social media until 16. In fact, DS2 is currently on a phone ban because he signed up to Instagram without our knowledge and tried to hide it, the wee fool!

No TV in bedrooms
No pierced ears until she's old enough to do the aftercare herself
No road cycling- the infrastructure here is shite and I don't trust it. I've cycled a few times in the city and between the buses, pot holes, random signage in the street, insane pedestrians and angry drivers I think it's a miracle any cyclist has made it out alive (plus it's raining most the time....Edinburgh in case you hadn't guessed it)

I understand no sleepovers with unfamiliar parents but surely it's up to parents to get to know each other well enough to trust each other with kids for playdates at least? Some of my best childhood memories were sleepovers!

No toy guns (inc no water pistols) in the house at all. Though they do use at friends houses.
No food or screens upstairs.

Absolutely no food out of the kitchen and always eaten at the table. Totally non negotiable and they’re 15-22. Agree with no candles too, that’s a rule.

You're absolutely right on the temporary fairground rides OP. My daughter was injured on one last summer (whiplash and scratches) but two people who went on the same ride just after that were seriously injured. Never again.

None of my kids are allowed coca cola (the oldest is 11); they might get another soft drink like a 7Up or a Fanta on holiday but that's it. Also no MacDonald's or KFC - they know what they are but don't ask for it. I wouldn't stop them if they wanted to go with friends once they're in secondary school.

My DC are now older but never allowed TV's in their rooms...we watched programmes together then downtime and books etc in their rooms

I don't like ds 18 to get into a car driven by a friend who has just passed their driving test.

I completely agree with you there. My dentist said children that age should only have water or milk.

Me too. He's perfectly happy with water or milk so haven't felt the need. He has stolen my cup and taken a sip a few times but unfortunately for him, I drink lemon squash and take it quite strong so it was an unpleasant surprise and he quickly handed it back!

No play dates.
No free access to TV.
No console.
No online gaming.
No smartphones.

All things in moderation, the surest way to make sure they do something is to tell them they can’t.

DD is 7 and every now and then I say to her ‘do you want your ears pierced’ and she says ‘no, it might hurt!’ 🤣 all her little friends have them done.

I have heard of one kid getting hurt on a trampoline but it’s was a bit of a freak accident, I just make them watch the safety video before we go to the trampoline park.