Page 5 | Condoms in husband’s work suit

PyongyangKipperbang · 22/05/2025 00:14

Boreded · 22/05/2025 00:07

But by that logic if he had an empty place to go to then why would he bother taking them out with him 🤷‍♀️

Show quote history

thats my point.

If he was planning on sex with someone in that apartment, he wouldnt have taken them. But he did, so he wasnt.

Occams Razor really does apply here.

PyongyangKipperbang · 22/05/2025 00:15

"Be your age" is a lighthearted thing my father says to me when I say something daft. It wasnt meant to be offensive.

PyongyangKipperbang · 22/05/2025 00:18

Boreded · 22/05/2025 00:13

Be less rude!

but I’m not saying I disagree that he is cheating, he may well be, but OP hasn’t asked for an explanation so that is step one, not asking ‘how do I leave’

Show quote history

I agree that she needs to talk to him, but lets face it we all know that cheaters lie and lie and lie. All she knows the condoms where there and they shouldnt have been. He is very unlikely to 'fess up. So having a plan in advance isnt a bad idea. Her deciding what she will and wont accept will put her in a better place before starting the conversation, rather than being on the backfoot.

Boreded · 22/05/2025 00:20

PyongyangKipperbang · 22/05/2025 00:15

"Be your age" is a lighthearted thing my father says to me when I say something daft. It wasnt meant to be offensive.

Ah my apologies- I thought you were being a jerk.

Original poster

ForTealSwan · 22/05/2025 00:20

Boreded · 22/05/2025 00:04

Why would you leave? Or do we live in a world where someone can’t pick condoms up in their own house and put them in their own pocket?

they could have fallen out of a drawer when he was getting ready for work or coming home to get changed and he just picked them up.

if you are worried just ask him outright.

Show quote history

He said he doesn’t remember, I have already had a chat with him.

he also said that admittedly, if he had found them in my pocket he’d have been furious and thought I was cheating and maybe even left me.

I just don’t know. He’s not going to give me any explanation.

this isn’t the first time he can’t explain himself. He’s used “I don’t know” and “I can’t remember” many times before.

His ex worked next to his office. There was one time where he were planning on going out, him, myself, his ex, and his three other friends. I even picked the restaurant and everyone agreed.

he then told me the plan was cancelled and he was just going out with his two guy friends as a guys night so I didn’t need to come anymore, he also said they weren’t going to that restaurant but to a random place next to his workplace, turned out he lied to me and wanted to be with his ex and his friends alone.

he also has a severe porn and sex addiction and we have had countless arguments over him going to webcam girls.

OP posts:

PyongyangKipperbang · 22/05/2025 00:21

Boreded · 22/05/2025 00:20

Ah my apologies- I thought you were being a jerk.

Show quote history

I often am a jerk....so fair enough.

I apologise too.

Boreded · 22/05/2025 00:22

ForTealSwan · 22/05/2025 00:20

He said he doesn’t remember, I have already had a chat with him.

he also said that admittedly, if he had found them in my pocket he’d have been furious and thought I was cheating and maybe even left me.

I just don’t know. He’s not going to give me any explanation.

this isn’t the first time he can’t explain himself. He’s used “I don’t know” and “I can’t remember” many times before.

His ex worked next to his office. There was one time where he were planning on going out, him, myself, his ex, and his three other friends. I even picked the restaurant and everyone agreed.

he then told me the plan was cancelled and he was just going out with his two guy friends as a guys night so I didn’t need to come anymore, he also said they weren’t going to that restaurant but to a random place next to his workplace, turned out he lied to me and wanted to be with his ex and his friends alone.

he also has a severe porn and sex addiction and we have had countless arguments over him going to webcam girls.

Show quote history

Well this became quite the drip feed. I wouldn’t bother talking to him. Pack his bag and tell him to leave

Boreded · 22/05/2025 00:23

PyongyangKipperbang · 22/05/2025 00:21

I often am a jerk....so fair enough.

I apologise too.

Show quote history

Ha ha me too 🫣

PyongyangKipperbang · 22/05/2025 00:24

ForTealSwan · 22/05/2025 00:20

He said he doesn’t remember, I have already had a chat with him.

he also said that admittedly, if he had found them in my pocket he’d have been furious and thought I was cheating and maybe even left me.

I just don’t know. He’s not going to give me any explanation.

this isn’t the first time he can’t explain himself. He’s used “I don’t know” and “I can’t remember” many times before.

His ex worked next to his office. There was one time where he were planning on going out, him, myself, his ex, and his three other friends. I even picked the restaurant and everyone agreed.

he then told me the plan was cancelled and he was just going out with his two guy friends as a guys night so I didn’t need to come anymore, he also said they weren’t going to that restaurant but to a random place next to his workplace, turned out he lied to me and wanted to be with his ex and his friends alone.

he also has a severe porn and sex addiction and we have had countless arguments over him going to webcam girls.

Show quote history

Oh mate....

To answer your earlier question "Do I just leave?", based on this, yes you fucking well do.

Have you been looking for a reason to leave? Sounds like you have. And you should. He is a manky, lying piece of crap.

Pryceosh1987 · 22/05/2025 00:24

ForTealSwan · 21/05/2025 01:54

Trying to think rationally and not jump to conclusion.

Today my husband wore his work suit, that he hasn’t worn for a year. He asked me if I could check his back pockets as there was something there he couldn’t get out, and I pulled out condoms.

He giggled at the sight of them and when I asked, he said he didn’t know why they were there.

Could there any innocent explanation?

It’s the same brand that we use, so it couldn’t have been handed at an event or whatever.

Thank you

I would of had many questions to ask.

MferMonsterSearchingForRedemption · 22/05/2025 00:24

ForTealSwan · 22/05/2025 00:20

He said he doesn’t remember, I have already had a chat with him.

he also said that admittedly, if he had found them in my pocket he’d have been furious and thought I was cheating and maybe even left me.

I just don’t know. He’s not going to give me any explanation.

this isn’t the first time he can’t explain himself. He’s used “I don’t know” and “I can’t remember” many times before.

His ex worked next to his office. There was one time where he were planning on going out, him, myself, his ex, and his three other friends. I even picked the restaurant and everyone agreed.

he then told me the plan was cancelled and he was just going out with his two guy friends as a guys night so I didn’t need to come anymore, he also said they weren’t going to that restaurant but to a random place next to his workplace, turned out he lied to me and wanted to be with his ex and his friends alone.

he also has a severe porn and sex addiction and we have had countless arguments over him going to webcam girls.

Show quote history

It may have been helpful if you had said that he has a 'sex addiction' and he uses webcams at the start of the thread.

Look, you know the answer. He has cheated on you, or he was hoping/ planning to. I would hope the severe porn addiction and using webcams would have been enough for you to leave this man. You can do so much better, OP. You are worth more than this shit.

Dunnop · 22/05/2025 00:24

ForTealSwan · 22/05/2025 00:20

He said he doesn’t remember, I have already had a chat with him.

he also said that admittedly, if he had found them in my pocket he’d have been furious and thought I was cheating and maybe even left me.

I just don’t know. He’s not going to give me any explanation.

this isn’t the first time he can’t explain himself. He’s used “I don’t know” and “I can’t remember” many times before.

His ex worked next to his office. There was one time where he were planning on going out, him, myself, his ex, and his three other friends. I even picked the restaurant and everyone agreed.

he then told me the plan was cancelled and he was just going out with his two guy friends as a guys night so I didn’t need to come anymore, he also said they weren’t going to that restaurant but to a random place next to his workplace, turned out he lied to me and wanted to be with his ex and his friends alone.

he also has a severe porn and sex addiction and we have had countless arguments over him going to webcam girls.

Show quote history

he also has a severe porn and sex addiction and we have had countless arguments over him going to webcam girls.

LTB. You are worth more than putting up with this shite. Life is too short to live with this behaviour, he sounds utterly dreadful.

Objectrelations · 22/05/2025 00:28

Dump his sorry arse

TracyBeakerSoYeah · 22/05/2025 00:30

Oh dear it gets worse.
Before you do kick him out ask to see his phone.
If he refuses then unfortunately there's your answer that he's definitely been up to something dodgy!

WalkingaroundJardine · 22/05/2025 01:05

I agree with this. As soon as I saw the sentence about porn addiction and web cam girls, bang, there we have it. He has most likely visited prostitutes.

@ForTealSwan you probably won’t ever get the truth out of him but in your heart, you must know it’s not looking good.
I would at least go and get yourself checked for STIs.

BeJollyEagle · 22/05/2025 01:20

Giggled? 🤢 why did you just accept his answer of not knowing they were there? Why did you not press the matter?

WayneEyre · 22/05/2025 01:25

Severe porn, sex and web cam addiction and hanging around his ex? Not sure in conjunction with what exactly but it sounds like he asked you to check because he wanted you to catch him, then giggled.

BeJollyEagle · 22/05/2025 01:25

ForTealSwan · 21/05/2025 14:30

Thank you all for your replies.

it was a “silly me!” Giggle if that makes sense.

There’s 3 of them

weve never been on a date where he wore them and he’s never carried condoms with him, except in his bag when we go to his family’s house, but he’s never worn his suit in those occasions.

I want to believe he’s simply misplaced them but I don’t know.

There is history of him being a bit dodgy about things. He used to work very late frequently during those times, but he would FaceTime me and I could see he was at work. So I have no clue.

the giggle did seem genuine, so it makes me think it might maybe be innocent, but he does forget quite a lot of things too.

Edited

But if you use condoms, they would be kept in your bedroom? Or in a bag if you’re going to a family members house? There is no reason as to why they are in his work suit! I wouldn’t be putting condoms in my work suit. You’re making excuses for him. He’s cheating.

WayneEyre · 22/05/2025 01:25

You don't need proof

Anotherparkingthread · 22/05/2025 02:05

I was about to suggest it could have been a very clumsy attempt at flirting/initiating sex ..like oh no something is stuck in my back pocket come squeeze my bum find out what it is, oh look it's condoms giggle .. thinking this would cause you to spontaneously ovulate and tear his suit off. Then when it didn't he was too embarrassed to explain he set it up.

But then I read your update about him being a liar who ditched you at home to hang out in a restaurant you chose, with his ex. And that he's a raging porn addict. Fucks sake just tell him it's over and you're done. That alone would be enough, without the fact he's also probably a cheat. Pack his bags.

Devonshirerexx · 22/05/2025 03:15

ForTealSwan · 22/05/2025 00:20

He said he doesn’t remember, I have already had a chat with him.

he also said that admittedly, if he had found them in my pocket he’d have been furious and thought I was cheating and maybe even left me.

I just don’t know. He’s not going to give me any explanation.

this isn’t the first time he can’t explain himself. He’s used “I don’t know” and “I can’t remember” many times before.

His ex worked next to his office. There was one time where he were planning on going out, him, myself, his ex, and his three other friends. I even picked the restaurant and everyone agreed.

he then told me the plan was cancelled and he was just going out with his two guy friends as a guys night so I didn’t need to come anymore, he also said they weren’t going to that restaurant but to a random place next to his workplace, turned out he lied to me and wanted to be with his ex and his friends alone.

he also has a severe porn and sex addiction and we have had countless arguments over him going to webcam girls.

Show quote history

Web cam girls 🥺 he's obviously giggled out of being caught out , maybe he didn't get to use the condom but it was in his pocket for a reason. I hope you ended up enjoying your birthday, try not to be too disheartened by your sons autism diagnosis, I have two perfectly functional children with autism.

LurkyMcLurkinson · 22/05/2025 05:22

Given everything else you’ve mentioned about his behaviour in the past I think you have to accept that he’s likely had the condoms with the intent of cheating. I also think it’s highly unlikely you’ll get any truth from him.

Geeboo1 · 22/05/2025 05:31

My husband and I got married last year and I realised afterwards that a married lady with 2kids he told me they were family were having an affair until a year before we got married. After I found out he agreed to cut ties with her. I am 6months pregnant and we had a minor disagreement recently, I found out he has resumed contacting her again and she wants to move to the city we live in. I’m not sure how to go about the situation

ChocolateGanache · 22/05/2025 06:38

Go and see a solicitor op. Sorry.

Renabrook · 22/05/2025 06:45

ForTealSwan · 22/05/2025 00:20

He said he doesn’t remember, I have already had a chat with him.

he also said that admittedly, if he had found them in my pocket he’d have been furious and thought I was cheating and maybe even left me.

I just don’t know. He’s not going to give me any explanation.

this isn’t the first time he can’t explain himself. He’s used “I don’t know” and “I can’t remember” many times before.

His ex worked next to his office. There was one time where he were planning on going out, him, myself, his ex, and his three other friends. I even picked the restaurant and everyone agreed.

he then told me the plan was cancelled and he was just going out with his two guy friends as a guys night so I didn’t need to come anymore, he also said they weren’t going to that restaurant but to a random place next to his workplace, turned out he lied to me and wanted to be with his ex and his friends alone.

he also has a severe porn and sex addiction and we have had countless arguments over him going to webcam girls.

Show quote history

Ok so please list all his good points, and why on earth you care condoms or not