Well I've just lost my daughter due to the Supreme Court ruling. s

[Lucelady]

So as not to drip feed she's a Ftm trans person and a universty student.
I've just been called a TERF, JKR supporter and transphobic. We've had four years of peace and understanding with her not wanting any surgery or hormones. She listened to the ruling last week and we chatted it through. The last few days she's been glued to the Internet and her phone. Now it's all changed and her 'friends' have called for action. What that action is I've no idea.
She's stormed out.

Have I got the terminology wrong? I was referring to males wishing to be females & opting for breast implants & genital reconstruction to make them feel more authentic. This is another reason I find it all very confusing. I have always assumed a man who felt like a woman hated having male genitals. Of course this also includes females to males in the same respect. I could be wrong but it makes it more difficult to comprehend if not.🤔

OP stated fairly clearly - her DD considers herself FTM, having socially transitioned at university. However, she has a male bisexual BF and wants to have DC so, having been denied surgery by the OP overseas, she is on some level accepting of her biologically female body.

The person who is confused is the OP’s DC.

Absolutely this. I can only assume that the posters on this thread who say they are 'confused' and questioning the OP dont have a lot of contact with people, women, who say they are trans. They say one thing and do and act another thing They say they are, for example. A straight male, but are in fact a gay female, they say theyre male, but are quite happy to be female etc etc. This is not uncommon and part of why the whole thing is complete nonsense (not that it would be any different any other way)

The issue is that there is no 'being male' without buying into rigid and regressive sex stereotypes. Theres no such thing as 'living as a male or female'. It means nothing.

Most of the young people struggling with this are usually on the spectrum, if not diagnosed and part of the inherent confusion about life (not restricted to ND we all feel this) is transferred onto and into their views about their bodies and the narrative around them, either friends, school, uni, social media etc, will tell them that this is because they are trans. Its not, its because they are human and dont have the skills to manage the feelings about how we feel odd sometimes about ourselves. It doesnt need a name. But what it needed was for young people to be supported with this dysphoria and disconnect that they feel about themselves rather than be told this.

Ive had posts removed before for comparing this to if a young girl says she is fat, but she isnt and she wants to cut calories or take medication for weight loss, do we tell her she is suffering with her MH or do we all agree that this is what she feels and therefore this is what she must be and we must agree and 'support' her in needing to lose weight?

Activists pushing Self ID are to blame.
Things are actually worse for trans people because of them.
Worst. Activists. Ever.
The ruling clarifies what was always meant. Can we now go back to the tacit unspoken agreement of allowing trans women who integrate, pass and don't cause a fuss to use the women's? The ruling stops the fetish freaks from using 'trans' as cover. I think that's a good thing.

Agreed. It's hard to penetrate their changed mindset. My friend's son is a conspiracy theorist, it's frightening how violent and abusive he can get trying to put his points across, which he does daily. Try to stay away from the topic if you can.

I agree. Like I've said I know trans people who transitioned before all the "activists" used it as a way to push self id etc. They've all been accepted no one has harassed them or been bothered about which toilets they've used or do use. They didn't have any rights taken away or felt threatened. There's been conversations about it over the years with no arguments. TBF no one was really bothered as it was their business. I worked with one person, and friends with 2 others, I also know of a relative of a friend. None of these are activists or go on marches or protests. They are quite ' boring' in that respect. I don't know why there's all this drama about it now. I don't want men with a sexual fetish to wear women's clothing or pretend they are women anywhere I will be removing my clothes . As for genuine trans women who are genuinely transitioning or have already I don't care but I know women who are genuinely upset about it and these women should be able to feel safe. The trans community should sort out the members of their community who threaten and attack biological women who don't want them in safe spaces or who put videos online of them masturbating in womens toilets whilst dressed as women or who put videos threatening to kill biological women. These trans women who do things like that make biological women feel unsafe and force the issue. If all people are seeing are these activists kicking off and making threats it's not doing their cause any good.

Of course not, but you're not comparing like with like.

Speak for yourself. I've never done that. (And before you ask, yes I am a woman, no I don't mean transwoman.)

as I understand it in my limited understanding this is 'just' a ruling on biology. It does not affect how someone identifies. The Equality Act still protects trans individuals and anyone who identifies with a gender other than that assigned at birth. It odes not infringe your adult childs rights. How it affects single gender spaces we will have to see after the equality and human rights office issue their new guidance. University will have counselling and support services open to your child to seek support there, Stay strong - they lash out on those they feel safest with x

You mean single sex spaces?
(Single gender doesn't exist).

And yet here you and @DeskJotter are,
Putting your view forward with no threats of violence against you and people happy to debate your side of the discussion.

So, I am not convinced that you understand what an echo chamber is.

I read these threads and I feel eternally and profoundly grateful that both my teens seem singularly disinterested in all this, and instead much more focussed on… just being a teenager ie studying, sport, friends, socialising, eating!

The same with all the friends.

Blessed relief

I’m sure you didn’t mean it this way, but your post essentially crows that your children are ‘normal’ - neurotypical and not disabled. Because as we know 70-90% of those referred to the Tavistock (my child included) have been extablished to have been on the autistic spectrum. Ie vulnerable, confused, isolated and trying fucking hard to understand the world at a time when SM has exploded without control, when they were over-exposed to it during lockdown/home schooling, when they missed essential developmental windows that were even more crucial for ASD/ADHD young people but the wisdom of governments around the world was to close the schools and force them on line to learn and socialise.

So please, go ahead and crow. Crow that your children’s peers were not also massively influenced by this movement, crow that your children were not as massively influenced by this as a result of being younger at the time this was going on, crow that you are somehow parent of the year because your kids ‘were just being a teenager, studying, sport, socialising’. Mine were doing ice skating/ice hockey/tennis and also studying but clearly not so ‘blessed’ to have you in their life to crow about their relative advantaged.

Actually, please take your smug, ableism and utter lack of understanding of what parents of these vulnerable children have had to battle in a affirmative model, pre-Cass NHS care system… and please shove it.

My son has ADHD

For which I receive DLA

But my post still applies to him

Doesn’t matter - your post is still ableist, gloating and insensitive.

I agree with this. I was talking about to a friend yesterday and we were saying we remember being in the toilets in nightclubs etc and occasionally a clearly trans woman would come in. There might be a bit of a raised eyebrow or a smile amongst the women as everyone knew. The whole problem has been that the activists have wanted to push all the other stuff that comes with saying TWAW.

Impossible

This is posted in Chat

and?

So someone posting that they’re glad their teens aren’t talking about this or even seemingly thinking about this…. Is just “chat” ting

whereas if Special Needs or Mental Health… inappropriate

The DD did speak to me last night. Nothing about the SC ruling or the Prime Minister. We had a discussion on her homemade dough balls!

She's back at uni next week but only for a few weeks before recess.

Don’t bring it up again

if she does, smile and nod

It’s going to blow over. She clearly likes being at home.

She went from… your OP to this?

Quite the turnaround!