I am a narcissist

[ohyesido]

I am. But I'm not a horrible person.

I lack empathy but I've learned that it isn't nice to manipulate people.

Yet I still do, only in such a way that no one can ever really accuse me of it. Because I twist my words to indicate that I have everyone's best interests at heart.

Everything I do is calculated to ensure I get my own way while maintaining a facade of good intentions

Can anyone relate?

So you're concerned about him but also he will be fine?

Which is it?

@charmanderflame why not both?

Are you my stepmother?

I work with a narcissist. Well I line manage him.
He likes to charm until he doesn’t get his own way.
He lacks empathy for anyone but will pretend he does.
He lies, is manipulative and is just a horrible person to be around. Gives me the creeps.
Also has an inflated opinion of himself.
im not sure you are as bad as that .

Oh come on this is transparent isn't it. The son doesn't care for his mother either. That's the point of these posts.... narcs beget narcs, who do not care about their parents.

Well you're just contradicting yourself - you posted that you were concerned about him and then seemed offended when someone suggested he doesn't seem like he's OK. You said you were concerned.

You're defensive about people giving any opinions, even though you introduced him/ your worries about him.

For the record he doesn't sound like he's fine to me either.

OP , do you think narcissistic traits are learned or that they are inborn ?

Has anyone figured out you're a narcissist? If so, how do they react?

This post seems to have brought out the passive aggression in some.

Why's it so important to some of you to try and elicit a strong reaction?

I am what I am and if you want to make yourself feel better by saying some things go ahead. I'm here for the duration

Where does this misapprehension come from?

You can be a narcissist without having a PD. PDs are serious mental health conditions impacting relationships, work and general functioning.

@charmanderflame does that make you feel better about yourself? I'm not responsible for how you interpret my words and my DS certainly wouldn't be interested

What do you think made you like this, did something happen in childhood?

@ohyesido Your posts are just lacking clarity and don't particularly make sense. Nothing to do with 'feeling better'. Strange that you are taking things so personally.

I think the op has got a romantic poet picture in her head, perhaps dressed in a silk dressing gown, smoking a cigar and ruminating on just how special she is.

Reality is she’s probably Laura from Stoke who works in accounts

Do you see life as a game? Like you exist existentially to others?

Do you feel happiness and contentment or unfulfilled and disassociated?

Have you taken drugs in the past?

Have you chased highs from risky sports?

How would you describe your childhood?

When I read your posts I can see how narcissism plays a role in your life but your candour also speaks volumes.

True narcissists rarely can see this in themselves.

In a world full of narcissists maybe you are more adept at seeing through them and playing them at their own game.

Personally when anyone refers to significant people in their lives as a narcissist I run a mile because IME the true narcissists are usually those accusing others of being a narcissist.

I believe we are all narcissists to some degree.

Tbh OP you sound like half the posters on MN, although you have an unusual level of self insight and self honesty.

@Matronic6 my DH knows and seems unaffected by it. He will tell me to put a sock in it when I'm lamenting how difficult life is when one is so utterly flawless.

"Did she really say that, or are you just mad that she didn't acknowledge your existence?"is a typical remark. And it's water off a duck's back to me because he gets it

Ever? You don't? You must be the first narcissist to love paying taxes.

I was idling wondering why you feel it's important that people on a chatboard are aware of your self-diagnosed condition. I think it's more sad that you believe people want any sort of reaction from you.

As you say, you are what you. Great. Will you be able to move on now?

I'm off to enjoy the roast dinner my perfect DH has prepared for me simply because he loves me now. Bbl

Test

So why write this post ?

You have read the situation wrong. Your reactions have no significance for them. People are just casually giving you a reality check. They do not care how you react. You are just a random on the internet to them and they are not invested at all.

@ChateauWhistler thanks for the solemn sermon, reverend

I understand. I am .. something. It is challenging at times to hide it but I understand how to perform in the socially acceptable ways and my spouse, children, wider family and friends have no idea that I don't care about any of them. I have created the person I present to the world in order to have my needs met but other people are of no importance to me.

I pretend to care when my children hurt themselves or a family member or friend is hurt or upset but I don't care.

I've lost family members and have performed grief but I don't actually care.

It's not something you can admit to because it wold make things impossible for you from that point on.