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Original poster

Today, I man-spread on the train.

181 replies

Trainarmrestfairy · 18/02/2025 17:08

When a man sat next to me on the train and tried to manoeuvre my arm out the way, off the middle arm rest, so he could rest his there, I pushed back.

I’ve never ever put my arm on the middle arm rest between seats on a train before - I just take the one on the edge (either by the aisle or window).

But, today I fought back. Today I won. Ten years (excluding Covid) of men shoving their arm into my body and their legs onto my floor space, and today I fought back.

Incredibly petty, I know. But God it felt good. Not sure if that’s because of the surprised gasp the man gave or because of the power. Who knows? A victory to all women who have ever been squashed against the window of a train because a man felt it necessary to take up 1.5 seats!

OP posts:
crankytoes · 22/02/2025 07:37

ErrolTheDragon · 21/02/2025 14:57

** If someone doesn't fit a standard seat then they should pay for a larger one - the extra legroom seats or business class or more than one seat. Or use an airline which has bigger seats. Yes, it will cost them more but obviously it's completely unacceptable for them to steal the space a stranger has paid for.

Nope as this would be considered discrimination

Put your anger where it should be. At the transport provider.

MrsMoastyToasty · 22/02/2025 08:03

Years ago I went to the local independent cinema with my friend and sat down in our allocated seats. The 4 "yoofs" in the row behind us were an absolute nightmare starting with draping their jackets over our seats, then they moved onto leaning forward and resting their elbows on the edge of our seats. When I got up and went off to the toilet one of them put his feet through gap between the back of my chair and the flip down bit. I asked nicely if he would move. When he wouldn't I pushed the flip down bit down and quickly sat down, both bending his feet and putting my entire weight on them. The aggro we got from them was the last straw so my friend got up and asked the usherette ( who happened to be the parent of one of our schoolmates) for help. She and the manager got them removed before the trailers had even finished, so they never saw the film!

Brefugee · 22/02/2025 08:08

crankytoes · 21/02/2025 14:25

@Brefugee

If they didn't slouch they'd find it easier
The man in the normal seated position isn't slouching at all

and why do you think the normal position is the one i'm talking about? he is pretty much "in his space" and i have less problem with that.

The other one? not so much

ETA on second look the 2nd chap is still a bit encroachy, i would have zero problem asking him, or if he declined, pushing his leg back with my bag.

rivalsbinge · 22/02/2025 08:13

rumblegrumble · 18/02/2025 18:15

Had a very surprised bloke finding himself leaping out of my way onto the wet grass earlier 😁 I don't know why as there was plenty of room next to me on the pavement, presumably he was so shocked that I didn't move over that he got confused!

Also had great pleasure getting some horrid man evicted from the neighbouring seat on a plane last year, a bulkhead aisle seat where the occupant hadn't turned up. His actual seat was in the middle of a four so he decided he preferred to move next to me - where he took up the entire armrest and kept letting his knee sprawl into my space. I get shoving him over, then told him to stop it - and when he totally ignored me I took enormous pleasure informing the stewardess that he was in the wrong seat and she moved him back. For the remainder of the ten hour flight. I am still enormously enjoying the memory, the lady behind me even told me well done and I do feel rather proud of myself!

Love this! Well done you.

ErrolTheDragon · 22/02/2025 09:19

Nope as this would be considered discrimination

Put your anger where it should be. At the transport provider.

I'm not 'angry', just saying what people can do faced with the reality of seats which don't fit them. Assuming you can just encroach on other peoples space isn't an acceptable solution - apart from being unfair, it won't work if your neighbours also don't fit. One of the solutions is 'Or use an airline which has bigger seats.' - that's the best one really as it penalises rather than rewards the shitty ones.

CassandraWebb · 22/02/2025 09:21

ErrolTheDragon · 21/02/2025 13:19

But the second man still needs to be within his own space if there’s a stranger next to him.

He'd manage it if another man was sitting next to him, wouldn't he.

Exactly.

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