Safe place for those who don't enjoy christmas (for whatever reason).

[ueberlin2030]

A safe space to express how you feel this festive season, without judgement, whether you feel this way every year or are just struggling/having a hard time this year.
If you do enjoy christmas then feel free to comment as long as it's kind and not telling us why we should enjoy christmas too.
I'm not 100% sure why I don't enjoy it, and haven't for a while, though I do have some thoughts which I'm trying to work through logically. 🙃

Oh @FrolickingTowardsTheFestivities I'm so very sorry xxx

I really empathise with this; Christmas can be really difficult for autistic people (my eldest is autistic and the change in routine is very upsetting, even if it's a nice change in routine like staying up late or getting new things). My eldest likes autumn best out of the seasons and I don't like how Xmas is encroaching on it for this reason, along with many others.

@Houseplanter that sounds so exhausting 😔😔 My gran was the same when she was alive. Right up until the end she sort of organised everything and I wish now that I'd encouraged her to let herself take a back seat; she used to get genuinely anxious / upset about making it nice for about 20 people, worrying about stuff that seemed trivial to others such as matching serviettes and stuff. I can think of a few other relatives and friends (all female!) who spend so much time making it nice for everyone else that they don't really get to have much fun themselves ☹ I know some people actually enjoy hosting but for some it's just kind of expected or foisted upon them. It's not fair.

My dad died after a short illness just after midnight into boxing day in 2019. I wasn't there as I was trying to give my very young children a nice Christmas.

My mum died suddenly in 2022 and nothing has been the same since. I feel untethered, rudderless and I'm also in a relationship with my children's dad that feels empty.

I cry every day in December, I just feel SO SAD and I don't understand how I could ever be ok. There are pockets of magic and joy, I don't mope around and I'm not depressed, just sad. But jesus, everything is so magnified when the onus is on family and joy. It's exhausting.

@FrolickingTowardsTheFestivities I'm so sorry. It must be unbearable for you to have to hold it together. X

Sending you all strength for today, whatever it might bring. Thank you all for sharing your personal stories and words of encouragement to others. You all deserve a little joy, even if fleeting.❤️

Solidarity everyone, thinking of you all! 💪🏻💪🏻💓💓

Deep breaths everyone, remember it's just one day and tomorrow it will be behind you xx

@FrolickingTowardsTheFestivities thinking of you today. I cannot begin to imagine your pain x

Thank you, OP. Just the thread for me. Can't stand the forced jollity and happiness. I agree with a PP, when people want to force it, I just want to say bugger off and I will be happy when it suits me.

It all makes me miss people in the family that are no longer with us. I am glad the day is here now and it's just about over.

I don't host at Christmas, but stay at home with nuclear family. DH, and four DC. That's about all I can cope with.

Roll on 2025!

Sending gf you hugs. Next year can be different. Little steps, but plan to be in a different place this time next year, whatever it takes. Xxx

Thank you everyone for sharing.

Tough time of year for me too.

Really started to struggle with it in my teens. It became more about guilt - made to feel guilty for not wanting to participate, and not appreciating gifts.

Tried to make it magical for my child but not sure if it worked. They are cynical like me though so have tried to embrace this now they’re older.

Aiming for a pyjama day plus snacks x

Today is so crap. Oldest DC is still in bed and won't be roused.
Youngest DC spoke to their dad and I had to hear his voice which was horrible.

Had enough of it now and we haven’t even had lunch yet.

I always plan on doing loads of festive things then I just end up doing the same things I do every day.....just with nicer food!😅

I’m just placemarking to come back later. I’m falling apart a bit atm. It’s always tough but thanks to thoughtless DP I’ve been tipped over the edge this year.
Sorry for everyone finding today hard.

May I invite you to try the Christmas Puzzle
Let me know how you get on.

2.30pm in the UK atm, so I have made it through a good portion of the day. Not too long to go. Solidarity to all those, like me, whose only Christmas wish is to make it into bed tonight without any upsetting drama. Roll on tomorrow. X

I'm always glad once it's xmas evening because it means the day is finally almost over and we can get back to normal life again. I'm more so annoyed that our bin day is postponed because of this sodding xmas hols!

I've never celebrated Christmas as it's not my religion. I'm currently in NYC where they have so many Hanukah decorations alongside Christmas ones. It's so great.

I would so love to be away somewhere hot and sunny for Christmas, total bliss.

Today is even shittier than usual. One of my cats went out at 8am and hasn't been seen since. She's a limpet normally, so this is very unusual and I'm so anxious. I'm supposed to cook and eat a roast dinner with this knot in my stomach. I just want her home, to know she's safe. She has an occasional long day out, once a year or so, and has always come home safe and fine. I can't help imagining the worst. Been out looking but no sign. She had to fucking pick today.

'Why is it all so twee?'

Yes! Twee, sentimental, naff, inane shite - that's Christmas 🤦🏻‍♂️

Im actually having a nice day! It's the build up (from 1 Nov) that does me in