Things I haven’t said out loud this week. Christmas edition

[YorkieTheRabbit]

We know you’re dropping hints and not very subtle ones either. No we haven’t seen you for sometime, I’m sure you do enjoy coming for a meal.
No we aren’t planning on inviting you over Christmas, if we can do a quick present swap, fine but no more.
I’m sick of catering for your family, coming to us for a meal doesn’t mean you don’t need to eat all day before you get here.
You all turn up, absolutely starving, the last time you came it was beyond ridiculous

You could always TRY INVITING US for once, even for a takeaway.

It is rude to tell us we are 'Welcome to come for Christmas, but you'll have to bring something for yourselves to eat' when we changed our whole wedding menu to meet your very long list of food you won't eat. You think you are a great host but you really aren't.

Thanks OP, that felt good to say!

@Hillrunning You’re welcome

A trivial one.

No, I don’t want those fucking hideous gloves for Christmas!

(I do need to actually say this out loud but in a more tactful way)

No, I don't care about seeing the Christmas lights.

I read the heading wrong because this is something I did say.

Please for once use your brain to think of presents for your grandchildren who you see every week and know well.

And if I do give you suggestion don't pick it apart asking whether it's actually good value and/or worrying about one review you found on Amazon. Do your own research, use all that time on your hands as a retired person rather than expecting me, a working person with young children, to do it for you.

I have no filter, it just comes out. 😬 I applaud you all for your self control.

I feel like this deserves it's own thread! care to elaborate?

For me, it's I am going to do it my way this year, and you can make your peace with that. or not. I don't care.

No I don’t want to host the in laws and all of their extended family who we have barely seen all year for a huge extravagant Christmas breakfast when I have an 8 month old baby and a nice Christmas dinner planned!

I would love to just say it out loud and stand my ground, but it’s not worth the hassle😂

I don't care about your weight loss attempts, your diet or your bowel habits, so stop telling me 50 times a week especially as each time you tell me you embellish it more and more. No you are not doing keto, cos those 'carb free' snacks you munch on every second of the day do in fact have carbs in them...a lot of carbs. No, you are not the best at doing that particular job and no, it doesn't look the great. I can see through your boasting and over exaggerations. You talk constantly and your constant interruptions and calling me away from my desk every 5 minutes are affecting my work.
Just shut up.

Just realised it's not christmassy, sorry 😳

"No I do not know what my kids want"
Then will you take 5 minutes please to just F*ing ask them?

I have been providing vegetarian food for you every single time I’ve hosted you for the last 40 years.

So please don’t announce as you go to put a plate of pasta in front of me at your house “ Oh dear I forgot you were gluten free , I don’t know what I can give you” while you look around helplessly.

Especially as I sent you a text weeks before saying “ Just to remind you I can’t eat gluten , would you like to bring a Gf dish for everyone or just something for myself “.

Weren’t you embarrassed last Christmas when one of my teenaged kids had to go to the corner shop and buy GF wraps and salad because you claimed to have NOTHINg GF in your household ?

That would be no fruit or veg , no meat, fish or dairy, no pulses and no grains, no rice or potatoes.

I do not want to be pressured into making plans inviting large numbers of people to Christmas in June. I’m sure it is nicer for you to plan ahead for me to do everything but it isn’t nice for me at all.

Stop fucking making me buy the kids presents, if you want to them presents then you do it don't just send me money. Ffs.

Ah this!

Mine:

When you say you are struggling to think of things to get people for Christmas, do you actually mean you cannot be bothered thinking or looking and that I should actually do it for you and that would save you bothering?

And if you won’t do that, just give them the gift vouchers or money that I’ve already told they (being tweens/teens) would actually prefer, instead of wailing “but I waaaaaant to get them a proper present!” at me.

Especially you don’t even then wrap the fecking things, but send it straight to me so I can wrap them for you.

I said "We're really looking forward to a low key Christmas this year and chilling out."

I really meant "Do not fucking invite yourself round."

No I won’t be seeing any of you fuckers even though it’s Christmas because for some reason you think you can ignore me all year then summon me because really you want help looking after our nasty mother who treated me like crap and thinks you are both perfect.

I also don’t care at all that it could be her last Christmas. Telling me that I only get one mother and that I’ll regret seeing her doesn’t affect me at all because I’ve already grieved for the mother she wasn’t.

It’s your choice to leave the country for a month so I don’t feel like we need to spend every spare second we have free seeing you and please spare me the fucking tears.

Good God yes this - it's the thought that counts so PUT SOME FUCKING THOUGT INTO IT

I love them dearly and they're so generous but managing the wish lists feels like a full time job at the moment and my peri brain CANNOT TAKE IT ANY MORE

I always buy the food and cook the food. This year I wanted to go out for lunch. You, on your pension that’s more than my monthly wage, say it’s too expensive. You’re right and selfish.

^tight

Your idea of presents for our young relatives is beyond ridiculous. No, they will NOT want second-hand tat however much you obsess about it and dress them up as 'collectables', and I don't care how much you paid for the things, you are being totally infuriating, and their parents will think we are cheapskates.

No, I haven't told the kids you're coming for Christmas and I'm not planning to, because you always change your mind last minute.

Whilst we're on the subject, can you please buy them things they'd actually like and not what you think they should like?

It's not my fault you can't cook, that's not enough reason to come here every year for Christmas dinner.

It's also important for ME to enjoy Christmas, I'm not just here to facilitate you having a lovely time.

Just for once I would like someone else to invite ME for Christmas dinner.