Having a poo in someone else's house - Is there an etiquette for you?

[UniqueFinch]

So this is a question that I never really thought I would be asking on MN. Curiosity has now got the better of me. I had a discussion with my DM recently and she said wouldn't ever have a poo in someone else's house. To be honest, I haven't found myself in a situation where I've been in someone else's house and I've really needed to have one. I usually only go at home or in the workplace toilet. If I was on holiday I would go in the hotel bathroom, or if I was on a plane or train I would use the toilet there. I would basically have one anywhere if I really needed to, as most people presumably would, but there is something about going in someone's house other than my own that makes me not want to.
Is there a certain friendship or relationship threshold that you need to be at with someone to be comfortable with it? For example would you go in a close friend or family member's house, but not someone who is just an acquaintance? I probably wouldn't want to in any of those scenarios.

Yes. It's a toilet brush and that is its purpose.
I've never seen a pristine one other than the day I bought my new one anyway.

On a related subject.. why all loo brushes are white? Brown seems a better colour choice.

I was raised in a different country and until I lived in UK aged 24 I never ever heard of anyone not being able to flush a poo, also bathrooms had extremely efficient ventilation/drawing the air out systems.
Initially couldn't even understand the words like "toilet blocker" and stories connected to it etc. I think it's a problem specifically connected to ineffective flushes and not to some weird massive poos produced by the people of this country. We currently live in a house with such a shit flush (sorry) that my 7 year old managed to "block" the toilet a couple of times. Never happened in all the years in the previous house with very efficient toilet flushes.

And as for the topic of the post, I am one of these people who wouldn't go in other people's houses even if I need to, and cannot go when staying with other people and need a while to be able to do it on holiday. I hate it and wish it was different! Sometimes I ate something and basically don't have a choice but even then it's a problem :( I go a little just to give myself initial relief and then my body shuts down until I can get home or somewhere entirely private

I only have black ones. IKEA and B&M is where I get them from

see this is the crux here - I would absolutely judge them for this behaviour. I suppose my instinct is it’s selfish as it’s unpleasant for those waiting! That’s what people aren’t mentioning is that people do judge and that’s why many people are reluctant to go elsewhere or in work etc because people do see it negatively. I just think it reflects so badly on your colleague that she made everyone wait but also would have left it unpleasant for them. I suppose I’d judge her the same as if she took the last arming space that I’d been waiting for etc that sort of selfish or arrogant streak. Laughable I know!!

If you've got to go you've got to go. Just leave it clean. Put some toilet paper down before you go. Helps muffle any splashing sounds and can keep the bowl streak free.

I don't really think about it or care. It's there to clean skid marks so if I noticed Deirdre had used it at all (v doubtful) I'd be glad she'd cleaned up after herself with it.

I rarely poo anywhere other than my own home. Even on holiday i habe to be absolutely desperate before i can

I just don't want to know that much about other people really. I'm in a walking group. Sometimes some of the group go on weekend trips and stay in youth hostel bunk houses. They'll get one room with 3 bunk beds and 6 men and women all bunk in together. I don't want to know what Geoff ( probably an accountant) or Jenny( part time teacher ) look like in pjs. I don't want to hear them fart or snore and I absolutely don't want to know what their shit smells like. It's a step too far.

My arse used to clamp up at the prospect of going in a work or public loo. Honestly I would feel I needed but not be able to go. I now still have a preference to go in my own loo (who doesn’t) but I have IBS and also am on meds that cause short notice bumsplosions and I have to go or I will shit myself

It was 40 years ago and this thread has reminded me of it so it was obviously a key moment in my life 😄

Friday to Sunday? I’d have to go hungry.

It's more widespread than Mumsnet

I find it weird when some people would actually rather hold it in over just, going… You’re going to walk around with a poo trying get out all day? and then act high and mighty about not going in public? lol

Toilets are there for a reason, and there's no shame in using them for that reason.

If cleaning materials are provided and accessible, i'm happy to use them. It can be a bit awkward if they aren't. If I know what's coming, I'll open the window first.

I had a temporary cleaner for a few weeks. He cleaned the house for nicely and then finished off doing an extremely malodorous crap before leaving every week; which rather took the shine off.

Well lots of people do have health problems - not things that make them have to stay home all the time but that may affect their need to use the toilet. I never used to but now in my 50s I do.

This thread is insane. If I need to poo then I poo, it doesn’t matter where I am.

I poo normally once a day in morning, l hate using public toilets but if l have to l will. I'm not a massive fan off pooing in anyone else's toilet but l will obviously if I'm staying at people's houses for weekend. .

Although, me, I would rather poo at Paul's house.

This. It seems like a particularly lower-middle-class English form of mental anguish.

Wow I had no idea so many people won’t poo outside their own bathroom!