If someone said they'd arrive between 9:00 and 9:30 - what time would you expect them?

[cuupe]

What time?

I don't really bother because he never actually has a reason and it won't change. He only lives one street away. It's more frustrating when we're meeting him somewhere out of the house, like the other day I called him at 11am and he said he'd be an hour because he just needed to take a shower, he turned up at 2pm and he said he'd been unpacking boxes (which he does need to do because he's just moved house, but not when someone is waiting for him). He's completely time blind and just incapable of prioritising or organising himself I think. He was supposed to be getting a 10am train the other day and ended up asking my DH for a lift at 11:50 to depart from the train station, 10 minutes away, for 12:01. DH explained to him that he did not have time to buy a ticket and needed to buy one on his phone and immediately get to the platform (there's no ticket gates at that station.)

He still tried to buy a ticket at the machine when he got there at 11:59, and then called DH say the train had gone without him, so DH turned around, picked him up and told him he needed to be ready to go at 12:45 or he wasn't taking him!

If I gave someone that time, I'd be aiming for 9, with a buffer for traffic/public transport delays so it depends on how far away and how they were travelling.

Omg I'm stressed out just reading that, and I don't even know any of you 😫

Between 8.55 and 9.45.

Anything outside that time I'd expect a text message.

Ah, but then what if they meant 9:30 and only gave you a window in case you were early?!

I completely get what you mean, but the mental gymnastics and over thought processing involved with ADHD are, frankly mad.

Should I start aiming for 5 minutes into the window instead then? But then why did I get a window? See, it's all too hard for me!

I'm always ready on time if someone is picking me up, but I often vomit 2-3 times half an hour before from the stress. So it's really not that easy.

So I try to balance my reaction with theirs. If you see what I mean.

Most people are normal?

Why would he change his behaviour, when your dh totally enables it?

Well this was the first time I remember DH giving him a lift anywhere, so enabling him is not a regular thing. At the end of the day, he's 55 years old. I highly doubt anything my DH does or doesn't do is going to have a big influence on his time management skills. We're not invested in being unpaid life coaches for him.

@cuupe are you going to say why you asked?

200+ replies and nothing from you.

I wondered what the general consensus was

Me no later than 9.10 my DP no earlier than 10.10 when we go anywhere it's a nightmare 🤣

Oh, OK.

Thats why i dont agree with early times lol.

So what time did yours turn up?

The general consensus is that it's situation dependent, I know you don't really owe us anything but it's frustrating that you're not going to elaborate on the actual situation at hand.

Agreed.

If this was a telly programme it would be called Pointless.

OP why won’t you say what time they turned up?!

Is he ADHD?

It would be far better and more sensible @cuupe if you'd started a thread saying 'AIBU to be annoyed that my guest arrived 45 minutes late' (or whatever) .
And then most people would say yes, unless there was a valid and unavoidable reason for the delay.

The way you've not responded is very strange.

It's more strange that people are getting genuinely annoyed with me over a mumsnet thread.

You're me!

So you're still reading but not actually saying what happened.

Do you find it hard to understand why your thread is frustrating?

For all we know, your guest may have arrived at 9.31 and you could be a stickler for punctuality.

Or they could have been an hour late.

The best thing to do is use your own judgement, rather than ask half a question.

Makes me wonder if posting in Telly Addicts is not an accident 🤔 Just to confuse us all more....

Depends who I am always, early so would probably be parked up outside before 9 but not go and knock till 9 or just after but most of my friends know that I hate being late . My dad would be 830-845 My sil sometime around 11 or 12. Most normal people between 9 and 930.