Christmas has become very expensive.

[Flutterbycustard]

Just sat here planning Christmas and how much we will spend on kids (older teens) and family.
Have had a few requests and been to look the products up. When did hoodies, polo shirts and aftershave get so expensive?!

Usually we budget about £500 each on our children, and we’ve always considered them very, very fortunate. We know lots of people have a lot less to spend. But looking at the prices this year, £500 isn’t going to go far on adult kids.

Aftershave alone is nearly £100. The desired hoodie is over £100. They want some cash as well. There definitely won’t be much of a pile. And I know we are the lucky ones. A pack of boxers is over £30 and socks nearly £20 (the ones they like anyway).

I’m feeling like £500 looks really inadequate, yet I know that £500 is a hell of a lot of money and to even consider spending more is ridiculous. Plus, we don’t have more to budget for Christmas anyway.

I know there comes a point when the pile of gifts shrinks and Christmas is less about the presents, but I can’t believe £500pp isn’t going to completely spoil them anymore.

Nieces and Nephews will get cash, but again, £20 - £30 pp is just looking so mean. But we have too many to increase spends as DH has five siblings, each with 2 or 3 children. I also have siblings, but only a couple of nieces on my side.

Is this cost of living kicking in; or has it just always been this way as kids get older. I’m actually dreading how much it’s all looking to cost this year and wishing we’d cut back more gradually starting a few years ago.

https://www.rexlondon.com/blog/five-gift-rule-for-Christmas#:~:text=In%20the%20five%20gift%20rule,you%20can%20really%20have%20fun.

Do they know and understand the prices of these? Because it’s also great parenting to ensure that they do and are prepared.

I work with some teens who absolutely know money and some who really really don’t but should; they should be in for a nasty shock when they start uni or work but I suspect they’ll be subsidised well into their early careers.

i’m not talking poverty levels as clearly you’re nowhere near that but they should be encouraged to see wish lists as something to select from not a shopping list of ‘demands’

Maybe the cost of these new clothes means we need to start looking at second hand more. Just started from Vinted as you have mentioned. Most clothes I have bought have been decent.

Hmm, my Christmas budget is £40 or less per person and only one present per person. This year I am considering cutting it down furher - so the only presents will be my neice and nephew, god daughter and step son. My brother and his wife, my dad and Mr Monkey will get a card and perhaps a small token gift.

Money isn't tight but the whole rigmarole around Christmas - piles of presents, massive expense on things (often bought on a rush or reluctantly) has always made me feel rather queasy.

For nieces and nephews we stop buying the Christmas after their 21st birthday
For our adult children we do a stocking each (if they are here for Christmas morning)with consumables and the odd products that are a level up to what they normally buy.
As gifts we spend around £250 each but this year I'm massively cutting down as it's ridiculous.
Dd3 who's at uni will get more and some cash in her bank.
we have spent more than £1000 each some years and are luckily able to afford it but I really don't see the need anymore.

We give teens £300 they each want perfume, a Pandora bracelet, one wants a riding helmet the other trainers. That's the money gone.

Even as teens mine understood the really expensive stuff (bikes/games consoles/laptops) had to wait for their birthday when we were buying just for them. In general the piles get smaller as they age. My budget is £200 for teen DS and still-dependent student daughter, £50 for adult daughter and her partner, they have asked for domestic stuff.
Younger daughter will get warm clothes and some nice toiletries/cooking ingredients she wouldn’t buy herself intended to help her survive.
They are old enough to understand the value of money and the economic climate.

If they are adult/older teens and you are getting specific things they've asked for its not going to be disappointing, they'll know how much the items are.

I think little kids might look at volume rather than value of presents.

Just because they want it doesn't mean they get it.

The price of aftershave/cologne is insane. My son really likes a particular one but it’s £150 for an average sized bottle. He knows I can’t get it (so is fine having a free spray of the tester if passing by).

You’re right though each item is incredibly expensive and soon mounts up. It’s going to be a challenge this year but my two (young adult) thankfully don’t really want anything in particular so it’ll be just a couple of (modest) things each.

Spend what you can afford and want to spend. Not an arbitrary figure.

Surely you can see that £50 is generous to some? Op can obviously afford it. I couldn't but to some £1,000 is pocket money.

Was this back in 1957?

Escentual.com regularly has 25% off site wide for perfumes etc

Lookfantastic.com also has deals occasionally

Black Friday can be useful

T k maxx can be very good for perfumes but it's hit and miss

We spend £500 until they reach 18 (DC), then it's £20 in an card, a lynx set, some socks. I also get them an aftershave as a little something extra to open. However, still having 1 under 18 this year and I am going to struggle with £500, he has only asked for 1 thing and I am just going to shop around and try and get it cheaper. We do parents, but do not do nieces and nephews as there are too many

If a hoodie is £100 then what are you spending the other £400 on? That's enough to get shitloads of other presents.

There's really no need to encourage your kids to be so greedy.

If they're older teens they don't have a "pile" do they?

We will spend about £150 on each of our DC (15&13).

One main present of around £100 (hoody/trainers or headphones etc) then £50 for smaller things - bit of makeup, pyjamas, face wash, stationery, book.

They have two sets of living grandparents and five sets of uncles/aunts and ten cousins plus four godparents each - so they are never short of gifts 🤣

She obviously can't afford it, hence this post.

It's not illegal to save for the future, people! You don't have to spend every penny accessible to you on a brand new SUV you can't really afford, £100 hoodies, new iPhones and Alexas or whatever...

This is a big spend each child surely? My own DC like good perfume, and AS but I have never spent this much! I think to say "look guys ,things are getting a bit tight now, and we can get as much as we can for you .but it might not be as much as last year" This is good practice for them.Christmas shouldnt be about just gifts anyway.I also like E bay and CS .Usually start my Christmas shop around September and spread it out . Buy food for Xmas October .This year I am running behind schedule due to Cancer treatment(thankfully all clear now)

They're older teens, they understand the cost of things and it feels a bit greedy to be honest. I get when they're younger feeling pressure to buy them toys on their lists before they comprehend the price of things/still believe in the magic of Christmas (not saying anyone should but can comprehend that); but for older teens? Give them a budget, just buy a few bits. For relatives a token gift card is fine, we always get people a £10 gift card and some chocolates- doesn't have to be expensive.

I’m the same OP - grappling with the fact the big Santa sacks which were filed with enormous boxes of Lego/sylvanian/barbie now being tiny stockings where the 2x2cm blusher is the same price as the Barbie dream house!

the first years it feels awkward especially if there’s an age gap where some are getting tiny expensive stockings and others are getting sacks but now mine are all old enough to understand that huge piles are a thing of the past.

All my DC are in FTE so even the adults need plenty of stuff - i get some real treats but I do “stock up” for them too.

I worry that my dc won’t understand money and have high expectations so I try and ground them a little so would never spend this. Maybe I’m mean though?!

Ok I'm not sure if this is helpful because mine haven't reached the age of wanting expensive things but I think you just decide a budget and stick to it.
With mine I focus on the month of December as a whole - I'm not saying I succeed but I try to make the focus a month of family time/treats rather than a day of presents so my budget is spread out over the month rather than one day together. So we go to a shitty local panto every year, make the Christmas cake together every Saturday night is Christmas movie night and we take turns choosing. Weirdly I wanted to show mine that December is for thinking of others not ourselves so one year we went and did a food bank shop and this has turned into a Christmas tradition that mine love the most. It's not 100% in the spirit of things as they end up fighting competing over who got the nicest treat to put in but the idea is there.

Anyway this might not be relevant at all for the age your kids are but I've definitely found that focusing on the month not the day takes the pressure of making it an amazing and magical day.

They will know if they have a budget that their expectations need to match it. It’s a good lesson for their future. I don’t remember feeling disappointed as a child, we had a much smaller amount although I appreciate inflation has occurred it was not enough to get most of the things we wanted.

Is this cost of living kicking in; or has it just always been this way as kids get older.

I associate 'cost of living kicking in' more with people with a monthly budget of less than what you're planning on spending on one child and struggling to put food on the table at the end of the month.

£100 for aftershave or a hoodie, boxers at £30 and socks for £20 isn't cost of living, you just have children with high expectations and expensive tastes.

Obviously nothing wrong with spending the money if you have it. It does get more expensive as they get older for smaller and fewer gifts for sure. But they are old enough to understand that wanting such expensive items will mean fewer presents in their pile.

An inexpensive way of bulking out their pile is to make a little hamper of their favourite snacks / drinks etc