Fired due to my personality

[Underyourthumb]

I started a new job 3 weeks ago and I thought all was going well until I got called into a meeting yesterday at 3pm. They told me that while I am pleasant and polite, I’m not very bubbly. This is a receptionist position in a dentist. One of the things that they said was “the girl we saw at the interview… we haven’t seen her since” l was trying not to get upset by this remark because I had no idea they felt this way and I thought all this time I WAS acting the same. I mean of course I’m going to be over the top and chatty and putting my best self out there at the interview because I’m trying to sell myself. But I am ALWAYS so happy and smiley and upbeat when patients come in. I have worked in customer service/hospitality and reception jobs for years and have always received such positive feedback regarding my demeanour and pleasantness so I am just so confused. They are saying they were hoping I would be more out there and bubbly and have a laugh with the patients. But I do try to do this with the ones who actually seem like they want to chat. Most of them don’t want to chat to the receptionist at the dentist… they just want to be checked in and take a seat. I’ve never been to a doctors or dentists where the reception team are the life and soul of the party and have chats with the patients.They have other things to be doing. I may ask them how their day is or if I’ve built a rapport with them already I might say “oh how’s your back now, are you feeling better since last time?” Etc.. I’m not miserable or anti social. But they want MORE. I am so so upset because it feels like such a personal attack on my personality rather than me not being good at the job. They don’t like me because of me and im trying not to let it hurt my feelings but it’s making me now second guess how I act. I’m definitely not bubbly and loud and outgoing, which it’s obviously what they’re after. But I can do the job well, and I am personable and friendly and professional and this is just a massive slap in the face. To lose my job over my personality is devastating!

Has anyone experienced this? How can I pick myself up? I feel like absolute shit about myself.

Very sorry to hear that you got fired. Maybe I can offer a different perspective since we own a dental practice. Our receptionist is a 50+ year old lady so certainly not a bubbly girl. However, each time she answers the phone there is a high level of enthusiasm and good cheer in her voice. This makes the whole practice sound warm and welcoming. Additionally, she is genuinely interested in the patients. Admittedly, our practice is a rural one so there is an increased chance to develop personal relationships and she has been in the practice for 13 years so she knows our patients well. She is also trusted well by the patients so if they have any concerns they share them with her and she then communicates those concerns with us. She is the clinic's first point of defense and the marketing face of the clinic. These are the qualities I would want in a receptionist. It is not about putting on a bubbly front but being genuinely interested in the patients' well being. Hope this helps! And before anybody asks she is highly valued by us and the patients and well-compensated.

Exactly what I was thinking. 'Bubbly' is a very gendered expectation. I have never heard anyone talk about a bubbly man.

Your employers sound like arseholes OP.

I have heard many times of people being ‘let go’ due to cultural fit, and this for me is just that. Albeit it ridiculous!

It is absolutely NOT about your personality, so don’t even think that for a second! They clearly want someone out there and life and soul type stuff (god knows why, it’s a dentist, that would put me off immediately!) BUT, and this is the really big but, they failed to tell you their vision at interview stage. If they did, you’d have most likely passed on the job right? Because it’s not you, based on what you said, you’re professional, friendly and polite (again, what we all massively want from a dentist receptionist) but for some reason they want life and soul as they (most likely mistakenly) believe it will drive loyalty in customers.

Please DO NOT blame yourself here, they weren’t clear on what they wanted at interview. My advice would be learn from it and move on, add to your interview questions armoury things like ‘what sort of personality fits with your brand’ or ‘what’s your vision for the practice’. And in the meantime, keep being you, as that dentist will soon learn no one wants to talk about their weekend when they’re about to have a root canal!

You're probably better off. Nobody likes to go out that way, but if they'd fire you for such a stupid reason, you're probably better off working somewhere else.

That was my first thought too. That someone they really wanted had suddenly become available.

I did ask the OP if the job has been readvertised but I'm not sure she saw my question in amongst all the posts.

How bloody rude of them. I would be asking to see my job description, specifically the part where it says you must be "bubbly".

It wasn’t your personality at all it was (sensibly) saying no to the tiktoks! I hope you quickly find something that you enjoy more x

Hi op,

Oh dear, they let you go because you arennt chatting with patients 😵‍💫

well. You are professional, you did a great job and you were just TOO GOOD for them. Good you arent there anymore it would have been horrible for you to have to consider their crazy expectations.

You will find another job. Do exactly the same. Everything will be fine. You are great. You just need to find other great people to be around.

Good luck 🌺

Three weeks, they can let her go any time. And have.

They didn't even give you a fair shot. Don't beat yourself up over this. It sounds like you were doing a great job . It's their loss . The word "bubbly" to me describes an "airhead".

Even if they had to readvertise for legal reasons they could still take whoever they wanted.

You don't have to ve over the top bubbly to ve a dental receptionist, it's not a holiday rep! You sound perfect in your role. All customers want is politeness and a smile, not hi de hi!

Oh find yourself somewhere that deserves you, they sound fickle & a bit weird

Bubbly people drive me up the wall, too.

Its like how at school they said i wasn't suited for childcare because i was not social enough. Yeah exactly what i needed to hear,i was born with brain damage i struggle to understand other people social cues and emotions.It really sucks because i like people but cant express it.So people just think i am a bitch.

I had to learn a lot of mimicry at work to work in a social setting .Unfortunately some jobs will just find a excuse to fire iregardless of your skill or personality .Personally i think it was them and not you ,people are strange and hard to understand

Dental practices can be the most toxic places! And most dentists are driven by money and forget they are humans like the rest of us. There are good ones but I’ve also seen some of the worst. Sounds like they did you a favour in the long run. They probably would have kept your pay as low as possible and worked you like a dog. You would never be praised if you did anything good as they’d be scared you ask for something in return.

That's useless company. Better off without

Bubbly is a complete turn off. And lack of such not a reason to be sacked. Xx

God this has annoyed me so much, what a ridiculous pair they are. You are definitely better off for not working there OP.

As an aside, as others have mentioned it, I think a lot of dental surgeries are becoming completely out of touch with this move towards prioritising cosmetic dentistry, if only for the image they are desperate to curate in the process.

I went for a scale and polish at a new place when I couldn't get an appointment at my own dentist and it was like walking in to an episode of TOWIE.

Everybody was so young and in full glam makeup. OTT on the pleasantries. There was a "selfie wall" with neon signs stuck to it, like you see in nightclubs.

I'm only 30 myself but I felt like an old frump and so out of place sitting there in the waiting room with my hair tied back, no makeup on and waiting to have my very imperfect teeth cleaned.

It's not the environment that the average person wants is it?

If that's how I felt then god knows what much older people would feel like. My DM would have hated it.

Wow they’ve done you a favour op. Unprofessional arseholes.

It would -iss me off if she /he was bubbly especially a bubbly man?
eww

get a better job where you will be appreciated for yourself
sounds like unfair dismissal but perhaps only if you’d been there longer and had a contract …

I’m reminded of ages ago when a dd had a temp job in an employment agency and there was a request for a ‘female, bubbly under 25 with long legs.’ Even then it was illegal wording - she told the manager ‘They can’t say this!’

Manager just shrugged, ‘If I send anyone who doesn’t fit their criteria, they’ll just turn her down.’

Well, it IS about your personality. No blame involved on your part. But what has been described is clearly a personality mismatch.

Okay fine if that’s your view, but how to make
OP feel worse!