Reception Home Visit - felt so awkward😂

[Cheekychiq]

Omg just wanted to quickly vent - just had my child’s teacher/TA round for their reception home visit. I had been extremely nervous about this because although I had consented to it, I was really not keen on having it because I just feel like it’s a massive invasion of privacy - don't get me wrong, I know that them doing home visits serves a fantastic purpose and they get to see your child in a more comfortable and familiar setting and can definitely be a great opportunity for some parents to raise concerns that they might not get the chance to do on the school premises but still - I feel like if I had not consented then you automatically get labelled as that uncooperative parent and it might look like you’ve got something to hide 😳

the visit went well and my child was very pleased to see them and super enthusiastic 😂 but it just felt soooo unnatural to me and I just felt soooo uncomfortable throughout. It’s the first time I’ve had a teacher at my home so maybe that’s why and they were very lovely but still 😂😂😭😭 just curious, has anyone ever declined a school home visit (if it was ever offered at your child/ren’s school?) if yes, did you feel like there was any backlash? Or not? Arrrgh feel like I need to really unwind and destress after this because I noticed the TA checking out the house (she didn’t know I could see her) and her eyes were darting left, right and centre) 🥲

ARRRRRGHHHHH😂 I’m sure I’ll recover …vent complete

I got one home visit out of 4 children all of whom attended the same primary, so it was obviously something they tried out at one point!

My son made his new teacher a "cup of tea" in his toy kitchen, proudly brought it over to her, and then wet his pants!

He's doing A levels this year and is predicted A* grades so weeing on the floor at his first contact with a teacher didn't hold him back!

I was offered one for youngest and declined it, this was 16 years ago. I just had the meeting at school instead.

I assumed the OP thought but after your comment, realised she may have taken recorded to mean visually 🤣🤣🤣 @Cheekychiq All the teachers sitting round next inset day, doing a Through the Keyhole style quiz "which child lives in a house like this" 😂

Beware of teachers who claim to have cycled round to yours and are still wearing a helmet cam!

Very defensive reply and inaccurate interpretation of my opinion!
Absolutely nothing in my post suggesting I am foul or abusive and I am not questioning the individual motives of the teachers/ TA s. It is obviously a school/ authority policy. Have looked at thread now and I am definitely not in the minority ,including teachers who think it is a pointless exercise 🤷‍♀️

I ignored the letter but they booked us in for a home visit tomorrow. Feels like a massive invasion of privacy.

I vote for more of a speed dating vibe in a neutral environment like a cafe where everyone can get to know each other better over cake. Either that or reciprocal home visits with parents and DC dropping in on teachers just to be friendly (and to check up on the suitability of home decor choices).

You don't have to be home.

They did what 😳

😂😂

Yes I think this is very good

Hmmm. Because teachers, being human like the rest of us, aren't judgey at all.

I still don't see why you need to visit a house to check it's the genuine home. if both parents are registered as living there, where else in the vast majority of cases is the child going to be living?

If the child is being looked after elsewhere I assume there are other rules which come into play anyway.

I've often wondered. When do these visits actually take place? During the working day, evenings or weekends?

No just make sure you have gone out. You might GASP be working!

I see schools still haven't got up to speed with the fact that mothers work.

You mean because the child goes to school and tells teacher mummy (or daddy) was drinking wine last night?

Oh well.

Kids are very observant aren’t they 🥲

My husband told his teacher his mum did drug runs for a living. She was a delivery driver for a pharmacy.

I dont buy its partly to check it's the real home address. If that's the case why no home visits for high school?

I can't see how anyone could get over stressed about this unless their living situation isn't suitable for a child, and they know that. Just tidy up a little! No one is actually judging mess as such. It does give a really good insight as to how the child might be in school

it really doesn't. Someone might employ a cleaner so you walk into a nice clean house. You'll look around approvingly and think the child (especially if a girl) will be compliant and well behaved.

it tells you nothing

I don't think the teacher keeps a spreadsheet of all the kids' gossip about their parents' wine-drinking

claps fervently this is exactly what I was thinking.

It’s tricky isn’t it because for most people school hours and work hours overlap, and short of putting things on out of school hours (and teachers usually have things to do eg lesson planning and marking in the evening) then naturally school events and work schedules will clash. I’m not really sure of the way around it tbh - it’s not really an attack on working mums but just thrown into sharper focus now there’s less SAHM but the problem isn’t one that can be easily solved short of putting things on out of school hours which isn’t feasible for a variety of reasons

DC1 visit was slap bang in the middle of my working day on a wednesday so I had to take it as a holiday. I asked if they could change it to Friday early afternoon so I only had to use half a day hol and could do something with the rest of the afternoon and was told no because the teachers wanted an early finish 🙄

The family having a cleaner tells you the girl will be compliant?! What a leap. What would it tell you if the child was a boy?

@nosmartphone

You can tell the parents that are on board with their child's school/teacher/journey and the ones that simply don't want to put any extra effort in. It's actually heartbreaking. They're the first ones in to complain though.

How dare you suggest that declining a home visit means I am not interested in putting any effort in. That's the judgement I don't need. I put my absolute heart and soul into getting my children through school. I'm still supporting them as bloody adults ffs - having a home visit would be no indicator of willingness to engage on my part. Merely a way to keep my children's space safe. I had an absolutely fantastic relationship with the schools my DC attended and there was a lot of extra Input needed all round. I would hate to think you would have judged me at the start based on the home visit being declined. I went through over 15 years of total struggles with my DC going through school and I absolutely out that extra effort in. I have it everything I had. It actual resulted in a total breakdown of my own mental health on the final years.

If you think the only parents who are interested are those who accept a home visit you are very much mistaken.