Reception Home Visit - felt so awkward😂

[Cheekychiq]

Omg just wanted to quickly vent - just had my child’s teacher/TA round for their reception home visit. I had been extremely nervous about this because although I had consented to it, I was really not keen on having it because I just feel like it’s a massive invasion of privacy - don't get me wrong, I know that them doing home visits serves a fantastic purpose and they get to see your child in a more comfortable and familiar setting and can definitely be a great opportunity for some parents to raise concerns that they might not get the chance to do on the school premises but still - I feel like if I had not consented then you automatically get labelled as that uncooperative parent and it might look like you’ve got something to hide 😳

the visit went well and my child was very pleased to see them and super enthusiastic 😂 but it just felt soooo unnatural to me and I just felt soooo uncomfortable throughout. It’s the first time I’ve had a teacher at my home so maybe that’s why and they were very lovely but still 😂😂😭😭 just curious, has anyone ever declined a school home visit (if it was ever offered at your child/ren’s school?) if yes, did you feel like there was any backlash? Or not? Arrrgh feel like I need to really unwind and destress after this because I noticed the TA checking out the house (she didn’t know I could see her) and her eyes were darting left, right and centre) 🥲

ARRRRRGHHHHH😂 I’m sure I’ll recover …vent complete

It's safeguarding

HNRTFT but as a Mum of late 20 year olds I cannot understand the logic of home visits. Surely teachers and TAs have enough to keep themselves busy without these pointless visits! A quick snapshot of a child’s home doesn’t tell them anything about the child!

A seven year partnership in which the school thinks taking a day’s annual leave to cover a 30 minute meeting is a reasonable expectation?

That makes me weep for the parents.

Quite standard for a lot of schools when your dc start reception. You get a lot of good information that you don't get in admission forms etc that help the reception teacher know your child better.

Words actually fail me.
Please don't come to my school.

Teacher here and I do home visits. I promise we are not judging. We find them awkward too. We just come to chat to the child in their safe space. It can help with transition- particularly with those children who are feeling anxious. I'm sure the TA wasn't purposefully nosing. Sometimes your eyes wander. We never talk about a house when we leave. Just move onto the next one.

Oh I see
That is a bit crap. Even a 'Mrs x can't be here, but thjs js Mrs y your teacher' would have been better wouldn't it.

God, we were also mid-renovation (in fact one kitchen was open to the garden, apart from a layer of plastic, and there was no floor anywhere downstairs), but it didn’t occur to me to feel ‘judged’. It’s not as though teachers magically acquire houses that don’t need renovating! DS’s two teachers had to wobble along a plank over unset cement through the house, and sit in the garden.

If you did read the whole thread, you will have seen many different professionals (teachers) explaining why it's not a 'pointless visit' and how a 'quick snapshot of a child's home' can indeed tell them lots about the child. But hey, why listen to professionals when you can rely on your experience of having kids at primary school two decades ago....

It's a funny old job being a teacher, as on the whole we do the job of educating other people's children to the very best of our abilities, but unlike say doctors, lawyers, civil servants, it's perfectly acceptable to routinely question our motives and ability- and at times just be foul and abusive. I mean everyone's been to school, and teaching looks really easy right? I mean, how hard could it be to just turn up at 9.00 and read a powerpoint...

Your alternative approach sounds so much more sensible @SussexLass87 !

So a question to the teachers - how do you remember which child comes from which home in a class of say 30 pupils based on a 10 minute visit.

Is each visit is documented with your observations and kept with the child's records? If yes, is this available to parents to read?

My kids Primary did this for DD, my first? But j don't remember it being suggested/required for DS. They say it is so your child can meet the teacher prior to arrival so it's not a new face? And to give you the chance to ask questions? But I definitely got the feeling they are doong a quick reccy to see f there are potential problems at home. I didn't have a problem with it.

In my opinion, I think a child’s behaviour at school will probably speak more volumes and give a bit of an insight into what home life could potentially be like than a teacher coming to do a home visit for 15-20 mins…

Yes, they are recorded, and yes if you wanted to access the record you could. Hopefully you wouldn't waste the school's time and resources just to make a point about disagreeing with the visit, because that would be petty.

They’re recorded 😳

Except that this approach misses the main point of safeguarding, which is putting the child's interest first, and not that of the adult.

So what type of information are you recording?

And why would it be petty of me to ask to see what your 10 minute visit has concluded about my child and their home circumstances?

Yes. My DS went to a pre- school that the Head ruled with a rod of iron (it transpired)
A kindly group leader came to visit him at home.
She was lovely, but yeah it was awkward..
I spent all the time worrying about my grubby skirting boards and such like 😂
24ish years ago..

His primary did no such nonsense

I went to a school that did this and I complied. Because we’re well off and could afford for me to be a SAHP to attend all the meetings; pull a costume together with one day’s notice; come in once a week to read with the kids; raise money with the PTA; help supervise on library and swimming trips; come to every open assembly, play and carol service; etc. It was no problem to provide money for trips or class supplies, to help the school meet its curriculum obligations or to donate towards enriching extras like having an animal specialist come in.

But I grew up in poverty and felt its effects. And my career was in the third sector, mainly for charities serving the less well off. So I’m very aware of the stresses that a huge number of families experience trying to meet ill thought out (and often unlawful) requests from schools.

The vast majority of the teachers at my kids’ school have been fantastic, but it does generally seem that it’s never occurred to most of them that the things they ask of parents don’t come out of a magic bag. That days off will mean a lost wage for some families and that might mean less food, no after school clubs, no trip at the weekend, an argument, anxiety, etc.

How blinkered and dramatic

Trust me, your child's teacher will know EVERYTHING about your life - if you think the home visit was an invasion of privacy, you ain't seen nothing yet...

I think PP means notes rather than actual recordings!

Do you think none of them have families themselves or any understanding of the pressures on families? Of course they do. But it's an important part of a school's work to foster relationships with parents - both have a large influence on children and there should be partnerships with the families. We invite parents in and hold events in order to involve them in school life and to understand how and what their children learn at school. We know not everyone can do / attend everything - but we offer it to those who can and want to. And the children want their parents to know about what they do at school and to support them. Our focus is the CHILD'S needs. It's sad that many posters can't see that as presumably they care about their child.

The visits are FOR THE CHILD to support their transition into school. They are not to check if you've cleaned your floor recently. However, if they were obvious safeguarding concerns, those would have to be reported on. It's not the aim of a visit though.

Also I guess you judge the staff / school as much as you think they are judging you.

The same way as you have to remember so many other things about every child. I wouldn't/don't find that difficult at all.

I think it's deluded in the extreme to insist that all home visit teachers don't judge.