How old were you when you stopped having sex.

[whatisforteamum]

I'm 57 and realised that I barely ever have sex now
Relationship issues and dh has had ED since a heart attack does have Viagra though.
I don't have much drive really tbh.
How old where you when you stopped having sex?

34, 13 years ago. I'm hoping I can re-start once I've escaped my current situation.

Hmmmm my libido disappeared a few years ago, meno related I thought.

However... following my discovery that my wonderful 'D'😆 H had gone outside of our marriage (despite me still putting out for him), without discussing it with me and he was shagging another woman, I decided to go forth and find myself a new chap.

ANYWAY, find one I did and my libido has returned with a vengeance! 🤣

It was obviously resentment for the abusive coercive prick I was married to, wot made my libido do one!!

Am 61
Still have sex with DH a couple of times a week,more if on holiday
Not planning to stop
Must be difficult if married /ltr and 1 of you goes off sex

Is it heroic? Maybe it’s because I’m autistic and very realistic about life, but I think it’s delusional for people to think that sex is normal after menopause without the use of hormones. It’s a bit grim too because things don’t work properly and it’s a reminder that we’re old. I don’t even look old…I look about 42 (I’m 52) but I had an early menopause and without oestrogen things don’t work as they did.

I can understand why women would try to continue if they’re in a marriage but it feels like there’s this weird lie going on where marriages are only surviving because women are either forcing themselves to have sex or they’re using hormones. In my experience, men don’t seem aware that women go off sex after menopause.

I had quite a high sex drive but if I’m very honest, sex was only great with a handful of men and that was because of the chemistry and desire. All the other stuff - the technical stuff is pretty irrelevant without the chemistry. Desire and chemistry are nature’s way of producing babies and that’s that. I wish it wasn’t so because I’ll probably never have another relationship and I’d love to feel that all-consuming lust again, but it’s probably better to be single and not under constant pressure.

Last night (I'm 47) and as always I feel lighter and relieved today. Not from sexual satisfaction but because it won't be expected now for a week or so and hopefully my period will arrive and it will be almost 2 weeks. I celebrate the lack of it. It is a chore and something done out of guilt and for the sake of my marriage. I am looking forward to DH losing interest as he ages. Sometimes it's nice but not worth the effort however understand it's important to keep it up. I had a low libido since my late 20s, I don't know why. It's sad but it is what it is.

Mid 50s. No interest at all and fine with that.

Never had much of a se life. Men just don't find me attractive!

With men I was 42, then divorce. But I met a very nice woman,. . . . . . . . . .
Uncertain as to future.

(Both) mid-seventies, have sex once a week, pretty regularly. (He also quietly masturbates now and then, so he tells me, but less than when he was younger. Me, not any more.) Sometimes afternoons, sometimes mornings. We need a bit of chemical help (him) and lube (me), but we still look forward to it, the foreplay, the orgasms and the cuddly aftermath.

Generally we timetable it into our weekly routine so we're not disturbed by grandchildren or deliveries or anything. Loss of spontaneity seems made up for by the contented feelings and affection generated/reinforced.

I wouldn't say I'm as desperate for sexual pleasure as I once was. I could manage without. I do like it, though; it'd be a shame to stop while we're both still alive and enjoy it.

48, a year before DH died from cancer, no sex drive whatsoever now (54)

66 and twice a week because like another pp said, I love my husband and don't see why he should suffer as a result of my zero libido. I insist on breaks though, as if I was still menstruating because twice a week non stop would be a killer

As we know, it's hard when libidos are mismatched and at 74, his hasn't diminished.

Does your partner share the same libido?

50, when I was diagnosed with cancer, and subsequent treatment.

I'm not interested in having sex with anyone and haven't been for years. I do still DIY though. But that kind of physical intimacy and being all selfless? No thanks.

And I'm 57.

40 and not interested. I don't really see the point of sex and find it a bit gross, really. Used to be very into it though!!

M

Oops posted by accident

@Dreamingofretirement There is a Thread on SEX Topic already, he say he is 24.

I read that post as referring to her partner! 😂

I've been on Mumsnet for nearly 20 years and this is one of the saddest threads I've read.

I hope not too many young women are reading this with dread, about their future sex life.

I don't see this as a sad thread at all

but I think it’s delusional for people to think that sex is normal after menopause without the use of hormones

Speak for yourself. I'm 58 and don't have the libido I once had but still enjoy sex with dh.

Me neither! I think it just indicates that everyone is very different.

55, with DP for 8 years (although not living together yet, which may account for something!) and still have sex as often as possible and hope it will continue.

However, despite having been married twice, he is the first man in my life I have felt actual desire for. He, in turn, is extremely happy with my obvious passion for him, having had a very much less passionate marriage himself. So our libidos are pretty similar so far.

I'm not on HRT or anything, and am technically, apparently, still in perimenopause (periods still, every year or so!)