Would you find this rude/be hurt by this? (Halloween party)

[itsahalloweenone]

A halloween party with over 20 people invited.

Couple are hosting it but they didn't invite the man's parents who live less than an hour drive away but invited his brothers and cousins as well as friends.

The reason given is that the couple want to be with people their own age (between 25 and 28 years old). Their parents are relatively young (both just turned 50 years old) and tend to mingle with their son's friends fine.

Would you find this rude? Why or why not? How would you address it on both sides?

Thank you

You aren’t going to… are you?

Sorry but if this post about you then you sound like the parents who think their cool? Id say my parents early 50s are cool but Istill would not go clubbing with them and if with friends i often talk about things I would not to my parents ie sex so no I think its perfectly normal to not invite my parents to every event i hold.

Generally, depends on the party. If it was a family party, with some food and a couple of films or something, sure maybe I'd expect them to be invited. But it sounds like it's a "proper" house party, loads of people in their twenties dressing up and getting a bit pished? No way I'd invite my parents to that (and no way would they want to come!)

I am in my 50s with a married DD in her 20s. Gatecrashing a party they hosted for their friends is my worst nightmare.

Yes, we're close. I'm even close with my SIL but my goodness, I'm sure that closeness remains because we all respect each other's boundaries.

We have young adult DC and socialise with them a lot, meals out, weekends away etc but I wouldn’t care if we didn’t get an invite to a Halloween party that their sibs and friends were invited to. Let them enjoy themselves….we’d probably be taxi tbh.

all resolved
I called them to let them know I wasn't going

Do not even think about it…..

Why would you do that when you were never invited?

Dear God, why??

Why would you need to do that when you weren't invited?

But you were never invited. Why would you call to tell the hosts you aren’t coming to a party they didn’t invite you to? Had you already kicked up a fuss? Were you hoping they’d catch a hint that you’re hurt?

Well I know why, you're hoping you'll make them feel bad for poor little you, so they'll invite you. I had a colleague like you, passive aggressive, woe is me, "oh don't mind me, I'll find something to do". 🙄

Are you the parent ? Back off and for any favour don't just turn up!

I have to say at this point, have you read any of the answers and reflected upon the contents?

You called someone to say you weren't going to a party you weren't invited to?!

Haha, I might phone up wimbledon and tell them I'm not coming to the the ladies final.

What a strange thing to have done

This admittedly made me laugh.
I called them so they could get peace of mind

I bet they were gutted. Better to give them plenty of notice though. It's only fair they know exactly who, of all the people they didn't invite, won't be going.

Why would they need peace of mind?

I think this is the mum, asking if the dad can go cause she will be away caring for her elderly parents that day xx

Try and find something nice to do yourself @itsahalloweenone I can understand that it may feel a bit crap to feel like the only one left out.

If you want to keep a good relationship with your son and his wife, do NOT just turn up! Sorry, but you need to accept that on this occasion you are not invited.

I haven't read all 35 pages, but have read all OP's posts.

This is fairly staggering.
I mean, clearly YABVU, and also very needy.

I speak as the parent of dc in their 20s, and no, obviously I wouldn't expect them to invite me to a friends party. Anymore than I would have invited my parents to any party I hosted at that age.

As to why you would 'phone them up to tell them you aren't coming', when you weren't ever invited. That's just bizarre.

Thank you.
I will invite a friend over and have a takeaway. Worse case, I'll get a takeaway, have a nice bubble bath and put a chick flick on