Would you find this rude/be hurt by this? (Halloween party)

[itsahalloweenone]

A halloween party with over 20 people invited.

Couple are hosting it but they didn't invite the man's parents who live less than an hour drive away but invited his brothers and cousins as well as friends.

The reason given is that the couple want to be with people their own age (between 25 and 28 years old). Their parents are relatively young (both just turned 50 years old) and tend to mingle with their son's friends fine.

Would you find this rude? Why or why not? How would you address it on both sides?

Thank you

Oh god, can you imagine being 25 and hosting a house party with your similar aged friends, siblings and cousins and your mum insists on turning up to 'help'

So actually, you don't like your MIL and you don't like your DIL, either.............. and you don't sound terribly enamoured with your DH, reading between the lines.

I would hope you do the same for the party if you are not invited

bully my DIL?

You're only 50 @itsahalloweenone you can't be relying on your children to provide you with a social life! Carve out a life for yourself that you're excited about.

Also, when I went on holiday with my sister earlier this year, he was totally fine, kept the cats alive, possibly lived entirely off spam, but who knows, we are adults.

Do you think we'll get a straight answer to that though?

You seem to be getting bullied a bit here OP. How about doing your own thing at Halloween, perhaps invite some friends for pizza and scary movies, have some bags of goodies for treat or treaters,etc. But... It's not obligatory to celebrate Halloween you know, a lot of us don't bother!

Just how long is the train journey to visit family?
Are we talking the South coast to the far North of Scotland or 3 or 4 hours?

Why does your husband spend so much time with his mother? Is she very old/ill?

In a word ..no.

You see 'golden replies.' All I see is a lot of rude and snarky replies mocking and deriding the OP. Some people have been really unkind. It's been a real pile-on against the OP!

Thankfully the thread is filling up fast so should end soon.

Sorry you have been mocked and derided so Royally @itsahalloweenone

I see you are not going to the party now. Have a lovely Halloween, and hopefully you can find somewhere else to go.

Can't you drive to see some friends?

Bully as in 'I'll sort the catering' , being there acting as host, taking over their party as you think you are the alpha woman in your son's life. He has chosen his partner, you are not it.

5 hour drive.
She is elderly, his brother and himself take turns taking care of her, they all spend a couple of days a week with her, it is however easier for them to do so as they live so close to her

I never said I'd sort the catering, just that I could help
which I won't do now. I won't go to the party

thank you for your kind words

Have a lovely Halloween...op isn't ten .
Quite sure most of us could amuse ourselves for one night.

FOMO, I guess. And a misplaced feeling that she's "one of the gang" rather than a mother and MIL, with the different relationship that implies.

Why are you making this party about you? You need your own life not living through other people

You need to get friends of your own now to keep you company because your husband is looking after himself and has left you sitting there.

i feel sorry for you but please dont burden your children at this young age. You are still young yourself, throw your own Halloween party woman!!!

You're welcome 😃

Yes, you need to get your own friends, your children are not those, and they need to fly by themselves. Now the husband issue does sound something that needs addressing, you don't sound happy with that relationship, which might explain why you fixate on the kids. You don't sound happy, and that needs looking at, and I wish you well with that.

"I wont go/I'll sit it out".

Why am I getting the feeling that you'll not do it with good grace, op?

Oh it's totally coming with a massive side salad of emotional blackmail. One night alone in your own house is a treat for most people, not a punishment.

But she needs to address her marriage and the issues re her MiL, I think.

Can you have your own Halloween party? You have a FREEHOUSE!!!