Farting etiquette

[ByLoudSeal]

I realise this is kind of funny.
I am very sensitive to smells. My house is a very small bungalow and any bad smell, or even cooking smells goes throughout the house and seems to stay there unless I air the place out. I had a guest on Thursday for over an hour, and there was suddenly a smell and it wasn’t me so it was them. I didn’t say anything and I didn’t make a point of going to open the window because I didn’t want to embarrass them but the smell really bothered me. I know it can be painful to hold one in sometimes but I wish they had excused themselves rather than just try to silently let one go. It felt disrespectful to do that next to me in my house. How do I address this with them? We are due to see each other again next week. Do I not say anything, or do I just try and insist we sit outside? What if it rains? What can I do

I think you grow up and realise it's a normal bodily function.

This. Light a candle if you really can’t bear it.

Don't say anything to them. I'm sure they didn't fart on purpose. Do you never fart?

Better oot than in 🙄

The etiquette is to pretend you didn't notice. We try not to embarrass people. You don't bring it up and don't make a show of sitting outside.

This is what my mother would do

This.

And if you are the person with wind you try to go to the toilet if you can. If you have no warning there is nothing you can do!

How do I address this with them?

Send a text beforehand “Hi Jane, sorry to bring this up but I noticed a smell last time you came round, so can I please ask, if you need to fart could you excuse yourself to the bathroom before you do so?”

Less awkward that way and will ensure you never have to see them again and deal with their arse biscuits.

I think you should change your username to YaWeeFartyBastard. Your text advice made me laugh, clearly do not send this text.

Surely you aren’t serious OP!Now if this person was like my ex and made a massive deal about farting, making them as loud and disgusting as possible, absolutely say something!

This is a non event!

Don't address it with them. It's one thing if someone is doing it on purpose with no thought for others around them. Usually we can hold them in until we have privacy. But sometimes they slip out by accident, or she might have been desperate. I wouldn't want to embarrass someone by making a big deal out of it.

I think it depends who the guest is and the relationship you have with them.

you could have the window open before they get there, and a candle or two going?

you could get a dog and when whoever farts, then go ooh the dogs farts are so stinky aren’t they and open the window 😂

but do people really excuse themselves to go fart!? 😂

At least they didn't lift their leg and yell 'get out and walk' or ask you to pull their finger.

If you choose to say something to them please livestream it.

You can't always help it, op. And tbh you might look weirder running off to parp.

I'd just open the windows before your guest arrives. Or meet outdoors.

Can of air freshener as a centrepiece?

How do I raise it with them? 😂😂🤣

Write them a strongly worded letter, out them on Facebook - with your sofa tagged and everything. Buy a canister of air freshener, if they ever come around tell them to stay outside and talk to them through the window.

If all that sounds a bit OTT then maybe you could grow up.

This. There is no other answer.

I recommend one of those massive floor fans. Switch it on in a performative manner the moment you get the first whiff.

Dramatic gagging next time?
Can of febreze on hand?
Face mask?
Gas mask?
Sit by the open window?
Vicks up your nostrils?