DS 12 has a lovely little bestie. They have been best friends for around 4 years and hang around a bit either here, in his house or the local park, hes here maybe 2-3 times a week max.
Now they're older they stay out later, so either here, at his or out til about 7pm. If they come here it's usually til around 6pmish then they go out for an hour.
DP and I both work FT. He gets in around 6pm some days.
A few times in the past I'd get a message saying he'll "pre warn" me when he's on his way so I can shoo DS friend home because he's "been working and won't come home to DS pal here" Each time I usually reply with a breezy "don't worry they are both in his bedroom hanging out" and that used to end the madness, but lately his messages are getting more demanding and argumentative. Apparently its not normal for kids to be at each others houses all the time - its 3 times a week at most for a couple of hours? He's also started hinting that I'm acting strange by wanting his friend here all the time (I dont? It's for DS!)
I get it, I like my peace, and his pal is very comfortable here 😬 he'll just wander in to the kitchen and grab an apple or drink without asking but meh, I secretly think it's pretty cool that he's so comfortable here and there's no issues re: the extra food he eats, it's not a lot and he is very polite. But DP says he doesnt want him even if they are upstairs bothering no one.
DC aren't allowed sleepovers etc because DP doesn't like it, he also doesn't like them playing in the garden, so I feel if I let him stop letting them have pals around to chill they won't have much left they can do!
Who's the odd one here? I think it's totally normal for pals to go to each others houses while parents are in, he thinks this isnt usual, I'm the weird one, and the kid should leave at 5pm before he comes home.
If its not me who's being strange how do I handle this? I'm so tempted to just reply with "no" and not engage next time I receive my pre warning message.