So so so shit

[NooNakedJacuzziness]

Waiting for my Dad to die and I can't do this. Pancreatic cancer spread to liver, he's so uncomfortable and they can't do anything to help him now. This is beyond distressing - you would put an animal to sleep. Just wanted to vent - he doesn't deserve it.

I’m so sorry op, it’s bloody godawful. I’ve been there will a relative with pancreatic cancer and it’s a cruel disease. I hope the nurses show up soon with all the meds he needs. Sending a very unmumsnetty hug and a hand hold xx

He was only diagnosed 3 weeks ago - I've never seen anything as aggressive as this. A few weeks ago he was living a normal life. Thanks for the handholds - looks like it's gonna be a long night

So sorry you and your dad are going through this. There are no words but care and hugs to you both. 🌈

My dad was on a driver at the end (at home). He still got twitchy and restless on his last or next to last night before he died. I know it might sound creepy, but I just got into bed with him (both clothed) and held him. It calmed him down. He wouldn’t have liked it if he’d been lucid though.

The same happened to my mum. I had no idea she wouldn't talk again, i wish so much that i'd have known.

Sending love

Sending love to you @NooNakedJacuzziness

I can’t offer advice that’s different from anyone else, I just wanted to offer my support.

loosing a parent is soo hard. Just be there with him

and feel free to vent on here when ever you need 💐

I'm so sorry. My mother-in-law died from pancreatic cancer and it was horrific. I hope you can get support from Marie Curie nurses or similar. Sending hugs to you and your family.

I'm so sorry you are going through this nightmare. Your poor father's situation, and those suffering similar end of life 'care', are the reason I support and donate to Dignity in Dying. The thought that my DC will one day face this hideous situation with me or my husband is simply unacceptable to me. There has to be a more dignified and humane way.

Out lovely old dog is 16 and in final stage kidney failure. She still has a pretty decent quality of life on meds, and still enjoys a leisurely walk, but when I can see that she's suffering and the meds aren't helping I will be calling the vet to come out and give her a peaceful sendoff at home, surrounded with love. I won't see my dog suffer but we are forced to watch much loved family members die in the most undignified, inhumane ways. It makes no sense to me.

Thanks all so much for your support this evening. A lovely nursing team have just gone. As soon as they injected him the hiccups stopped and now he's sleeping. Hopefully we might all sleep as well.

Thank you all so much, you're all so kind to try and help.

Big big handhold and hugs. You're doing amazingly. Your Dad will be appreciating your presence so much more than you realise.

Pancreatic cancer is absolutely miserable for all involved. Well done for being an advocate for your Dad tonight and asking for the nurses to revisit. He and anyone in the end of life deserve a dignified and peaceful death, so call them out as many times as he needs.

Thank goodness you’ve all got a bit of relief for now. Hope you manage to get some sleep OP 💐

That's awful, you haven't even had a chance to get your head around it all yet. Horrible, evil disease.

I'm glad he's feeling more comfortable now.

I’m so glad they’ve made him comfortable. Don’t hesitate to call them back again if you need to. Sending you love and a handhold.

Hospice nurses will come any time, day or night. Call them as often as you need to, that's what they are there for, to ease the patient's suffering. Sending love

One of the nurses said we should adopt a zero tolerance approach from now on as regards his hiccups, etc and get them back as soon as there's any discomfort, he was so reassuring. to you all, thanks again

So so sorry 💐

@NooNakedJacuzziness
Just reading and thinking of you and your dad. What a hard situation. Really hope he's more comfortable now. I'm sure it's a comfort to him that you're there.

So sorry your all going through this. I also agree that it's not right we have to watch our loved ones suffer. I hope you can all have a peaceful night.

Sending love to you OP, my Mum died from pancreatic cancer 8 years ago now. Awful awful disease. Glad he's a bit more comfortable now, hope you can get some rest too. 💐x

The bloody hiccups are back but think he's sleeping through them as they gave him a sedative too.

Sending a virtual hug and handhold xx

So sorry you are going through this.
They can give midazolam in a syringe driver that automatically administers it every now and again so you’re not reliant on the being available to visit. It will make him sleepy though and you won’t get much time with him awake.

Palliative care at home.
They can put a sedative in with the morphine and increase both doses.. ( l know we can't have euthanasia but actually this is more or less the same).. to make him more comfortable.. and this also helps him on his way to a peaceful death..
Sending hugs and healing thoughts.