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CF allotment thief thread no 4 - Babs’s dodgy solicitor and TV producers looking to cast for the role of Penfold?

990 replies

YaMuvva · 09/05/2024 15:24

New thread! Last one was here
www.mumsnet.com/talk/_chat/5049200-cf-allotment-thief-part-3-the-plot-thickens-and-auditions-begin-for-the-west-end-musical?page=38&reply=135136744

So a quick update.

DH dropped me off for my surgery this morning then dropped the kids at school before heading to the allotment. Babs was there gardening as were some other people on their own plots. All her crap was still there

DH went up and reminded her that she needs to be off the plot by the 20th. She said that she is awaiting advice from her solicitor to see if she can challenge us. She also said if the solicitor says she has to be off, she will be gone by the 20th but isn’t giving it up without checking if she has rights first. She did a fair bit of guilt tripping to DH about how she has spent 10 years being part of a community and having a hobby and she now has to give it all up but he held strong and told her, unless she comes back with a legitimate legal claim her property will be off the allotment by the 21st - wether it’s removed by her or by him.

However - enter Penfold stage right

Penfold is what we are calling the allotment neighbour who marched over from the other side of the plots (because that’s who he looks like). He started shouting at DH saying “You’re a bully! Fancy picking on an old lady and taking her allotment off her after all her years of hard work”. He pointed out it’s his allotment now and Penfold said that “just because your name is on a piece of paper it doesn’t give you the right to steal it off it’s rightful owner”. He then start saying “What do you know about gardening pretty boy? These allotments should be for real gardeners not pretty boys like you”

When DH told me this I laughed so hard I thought my stitches may burst 😂 DH IS very pretty but he’s also mid-40’s and hasn’t been called pretty in many many years. We are in semi-rural Yorkshire though and a man wearing a top that isn’t either blue black or white is considered a feminine.

When DH stated he does actually know about gardening, Penfold was all “Yeah right yeah right all you know about is putting your make up on” 🤣🤣 and said how these allotment owners have been around for decades he can’t just barge in and kick people out. DH said he was half expecting Penfold to say “this is a local allotment for local people”.

Then it was BABS of all people who told Penfold to STFU. Not quite those words but she said “oh do calm down Nigel”. The other plot owners just kept their heads down apparently. DH took off in the end but he is considering buying a Danger Mouse t-shirt to wear when he gardens. I’ve told him I can help him apply his make up 😂.

Anyway Babs’s words don’t exactly fill me with confidence but it’s better than flat out refusing to leave I suppose. I’m absolutely confident that legally she hasn’t a leg to stand on, but that doesn’t mean some dodgy solicitor won’t claim otherwise for a bit of easy money off her. Either way unless there is a claim that has legs (highly unlikely) DH will be round on the 21st to set up his stuff. PP were right about insane allotment owners - but we are just gonna have to lump it and not let Penfold ruin our time there.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
17
MissMoan · 26/05/2024 23:46

Maybe Garage Thief was storing a Deloreon that he only used from time to time...
Maybe Babs really did 'beet' it...
Maybe people are plucking Pampas grass from other people's gardens for their own personal use...
They say it takes a village, but I believe this one deserves a Vineyard!

MissMoan · 27/05/2024 00:33

YaMuvva · 26/05/2024 14:37

This has just popped up on my news feed - I am feeling very inspired 🤣

Inside the illegal 'village' built on a London allotment

https://mol.im/a/13456269

You've got to love DM reporting:
''According to Enfield Council, who own the site, tenants are only allowed one small tool shed measuring up to 2.75cm in length and 2.10metres in width"

2.75cm? Surely that's not wide enough for a trowel? 😂

BiddyPop · 27/05/2024 07:48

If you won't have energy for much summer growing, can you get some Brussels sprouts, broccoli and/or cabbage plants, and some winter squash (butternut etc) that need a log growing season but won't need much work and that you'll appreciate when feeling better.

Harrysmummy246 · 27/05/2024 08:02

SmudgeButt · 26/05/2024 18:08

Have to put this in here.....if there's beetroot growing don't forget that the green leafy tops are excellent. Like spinach. Marvellous. I hate it when someone has removed them and are just selling the root part.

That's essentially chard, which you van buy separate seed for too. Rainbow chard is stunning

LlynTegid · 27/05/2024 08:31

YaMuvva · 26/05/2024 21:47

Brenda Blethyn!

Good choice!

YaMuvva · 27/05/2024 10:53

MissMoan · 27/05/2024 00:33

You've got to love DM reporting:
''According to Enfield Council, who own the site, tenants are only allowed one small tool shed measuring up to 2.75cm in length and 2.10metres in width"

2.75cm? Surely that's not wide enough for a trowel? 😂

😂 my toothbrush holder is wider than that

OP posts:
Ohnobackagain · 27/05/2024 11:12

YaMuvva · 27/05/2024 10:53

😂 my toothbrush holder is wider than that

They’re not wrong though - it’s a shed for a very small tool according to their description 😬

Dogeatdog · 27/05/2024 11:14

Ohnobackagain · 27/05/2024 11:12

They’re not wrong though - it’s a shed for a very small tool according to their description 😬

Perfect for Penfold then 🤣🤪

Ohnobackagain · 27/05/2024 11:16

@Dogeatdog 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

CountingCrones · 27/05/2024 11:25

Dogeatdog · 27/05/2024 11:14

Perfect for Penfold then 🤣🤪

ooh, you cheeky minx! 😂

Daftapath · 27/05/2024 11:31

Pluviophile1 · 26/05/2024 22:16

When I was a child. The neighbours opposite used to have "intimate gatherings" with another couple...until the wife of one couple and the husband of the other ran off with each other. No pampas grass at the neighbours', as I recall.

Was this in Hampshire? I recall similar happened with our school secretary!

Dogeatdog · 27/05/2024 11:39

CountingCrones · 27/05/2024 11:25

ooh, you cheeky minx! 😂

danger mouse lol GIF by CBBC

Love this description - may use ‘cheekyminx’ as my next user name - watch this space 😝

CountingCrones · 27/05/2024 11:49

Daftapath · 27/05/2024 11:31

Was this in Hampshire? I recall similar happened with our school secretary!

Our school headmistress ran off with the married vicar. It felt like living in a soap opera for a month.

Glad to amuse you, @Dogeatdog - I look forward to the new username

quantumbutterfly · 27/05/2024 11:52

Dogeatdog · 27/05/2024 11:14

Perfect for Penfold then 🤣🤪

Arf

Pluviophile1 · 27/05/2024 13:15

Daftapath · 27/05/2024 11:31

Was this in Hampshire? I recall similar happened with our school secretary!

It wasn't. I felt sorry for the deserted wife, not least because she suggested to the deserted husband that they should shack up, but he turned her down flat (I didn't know this at the time, but my mum told me the details as an adult).

Pluviophile1 · 27/05/2024 13:16

CountingCrones · 27/05/2024 11:49

Our school headmistress ran off with the married vicar. It felt like living in a soap opera for a month.

Glad to amuse you, @Dogeatdog - I look forward to the new username

Did the wronged wife move to Oxford? Years ago I was friends with a girl who's vicar father did this.

Callipygion · 27/05/2024 13:51

Dogeatdog · 27/05/2024 11:14

Perfect for Penfold then 🤣🤪

He might very well have a small tool, but he seems to think a lot of himself so he probably wouldn’t get his big head in there.

CaptainMyCaptain · 27/05/2024 14:25

Pluviophile1 · 27/05/2024 13:16

Did the wronged wife move to Oxford? Years ago I was friends with a girl who's vicar father did this.

I had a girl in my class whose vicar Dad went off with a parishioner. It was very embarassing for his wife left to be an object of pity all around and she left the area not long after unsurprisingly . It's perhaps not as unusual as you might think.

YaMuvva · 27/05/2024 14:26

These men of the cloth ey, it’s all that self flagellating guilt about having a wank, it was never gonna end well.

OP posts:
CottonCandyLand · 27/05/2024 15:50

Oblomov24 · 26/05/2024 22:23

Sorry op but the update is a bit lacking. Let's hope babs and penfold do something exciting eg sabotage new shed.

Not sure wishing damage on OP’s property is really the way to go 🤔

MarkWithaC · 27/05/2024 16:47

So Babs was all mouth and trousers then. ‘Consulting a solicitor’ indeed. If she did talk to one I presume they laughed her off the phone.

MrsDanversGlidesAgain · 27/05/2024 17:10

Babs probably thought that 'I'll have the law on you, I will, and you'll be hearing from my solicitor' would be enough to intimidate OP into backing down - forgetting that the law is there for both sides in a dispute. And that as OP can prove ownership, Babs was not in what one might call a very strong position legally.

Callipygion · 27/05/2024 17:35

helibirdcomp · 27/05/2024 17:25

https://www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/beetroot-chocolate-cake
Don't notice the beetroot at all. (Beetroot very good for blood production.)

Do you not get chunks of beetroot in that cake? It says “roughly chopped” 😳

MargaretThursday · 27/05/2024 18:03

YaMuvva · 27/05/2024 10:53

😂 my toothbrush holder is wider than that

One local restaurant used to advertise children's meals for any child "under 1.5cm".